The only thing that kept her from hating him were the words she’d never forget when she’d questioned even for a moment his faithfulness. He’d been so adamant, and as always his words were so full of sincerity.
I love you and only you. There’s no one else—never will be. Remember that always.
There were times however that she wished she could forget those very words. Like the day of Sal’s dad’s birthday gathering where she’d been forced to speak of her charade of a relationship in front of Lorenzo. He’d looked right at her, his expression so reminiscent of Vincent’s. For a second she’d actually felt guilty. But it was only for a weak moment. Why should she feel guilty? Even if her relationship with Ben were real, Vincent did this—not her. He’d ruined everything over stupid drugs.
“Ms. Zendejas?” Rose looked up at the nurse holding open the door to the doctor’s office. “The doctor will see you now.”
Grabbing her purse and the book she hadn’t read a single page of, Rose stood up and followed the nurse back into the office at the end of the hall. Her heart thumped as the nerves began to mount.
Ben had offered to come with her. He was the only one Rose had told so far. It was at his urgency that she’d made the appointment to see a doctor in the first place. After telling the doctor about the symptoms she’d been having, the dizzy spells, shaky hands, tingling fingers and feet, the doctor ordered blood work. They’d told her it would be at least six business days before they had the results, but it had only been four when they called her to tell her the doctor wanted to go over the results with her. Alarming didn’t even begin to describe the dread she’d felt after getting that phone call.
She’d wanted something to finally take the place of the one thing that always took front and center in her train of thought, but this wasn’t what she’d had in mind.
“Just take a seat and the doctor will be right in to see you.”
Rose smiled and took a seat in front of the doctor’s big mahogany desk. The nurse closed the door leaving Rose clutching her book and taking in all the photos and plaques on the walls. Of course her eyes zeroed in on a photo of a few soldiers posing in their Army fatigues. Was there no end to the things that reminded her of Vincent? Then she saw the other photo. This was a portrait of what appeared to be one of the guys in that same first photo. He was in full dress looking very serious. The frame was lavish and the words carved just beneath the photo read:
Officer James Michaels–Beloved son, brother and our fallen hero. You will never be forgotten.
His date of birth and year he passed were just underneath the engraving. Doing the math quickly in her head, she figured out his age at the time of death, nineteen—Vince’s age. The lump in Rose’s throat was immediate. Dr. Michaels had lost his son in combat. As if things hadn’t been hard enough this past year, Rose had walked in on Grace and Sal a few weeks ago at the restaurant talking about Vincent being deployed to Iraq.
It’d been months since Rose had last asked Sal anything about Vince, so she’d been completely overwhelmed by the news. She’d already lost him once; she didn’t even want to think of something happening to him out there. Seeing Dr. Michael’s son’s photo made that possibility seem all too real now. And to think all of this could’ve been avoided if he just hadn’t weakened and gone back to his evil ways. If Vince truly loved Rose like he claimed, why the hell would he give into what he once called easy money?
Just as she’d begun once again to ponder obsessively about why, why, why like she’d done so many times already, there was a soft knock on the door. It opened, and Dr. Michaels walked in. After greeting her he took the seat behind his desk as Rose studied his somber facial expression closely. Was this bad news or horrible news? Was she dying?
He opened her file but said nothing. Rose took note of every change in his expression, the way his fingers tapped his temple, the eyebrow that lifted ever so slightly, even the way he circled things in her file.
Rose couldn’t help wondering if she’d inadvertently made herself sick like Grace had when she’d broken up with Sal. Though in the end Grace’s dizziness had turned out to have perfectly good reason, the doctors had said her rapid weight loss had most likely been due to stress.
Finally Dr. Michaels looked up, and there it was—the unmistakable look of concern. “Has your low red-blood-cell count ever been brought to your attention?”
Rose shook her head. “No, never.”
“Hmm,” he glanced back down at the file. “It’s very low. Are you a vegetarian?”
“No. I’m Mexican.” The second she realized what she just said, she felt ridiculous, and her face heated instantly. “I mean we eat a lot of meat.” The doctor’s eyes were suddenly full of humor, making her feel even lamer. “I work in a restaurant, so I’m often eating.” God, Rose just shut up!
Determined not to make any more idiotic declarations, Rose focused instead on his question. She did eat meat—lots of it. Though she had to admit her appetite had been at an all-time low ever since Vincent left.
Looking back down at her file, the humor had all but wiped off the doctor’s face. He removed his glasses and focused on her again. “Have you ever had any type of stomach surgery?”
“No.” Rose was getting worried. He still wasn’t telling her much. “Is this really bad?”
“Well, it could be.” He admitted without hesitation. “I’ll give it to you straight because when it’s something this serious, I wanna make sure we’re on the same page. Your body needs Vitamin B12 to produce red blood cells. Normally you get this vitamin from eating foods like meat and poultry, anything with lots of protein and high in Vitamin B12. According to these results your body is severely deficient of the vitamin. If you are, in fact, eating enough meat and protein, this tells me one thing. Your stomach is not absorbing the vitamin.” He sat up a little straighter, and held his hand out. “Let me see your hand.”