“No,” She said softly. “Never.”
The relief was immeasurable. He’d been tossing and turning for weeks about it. She was his and the thought of any other man with her, especially one she saw on a daily basis still, absolutely killed him.
He stared into her big eyes and he couldn’t hold back anymore. He leaned over and kissed her gently, and she let him, even parted her lips inviting his tongue in. He pushed her back softly until they were both lying down. It had been so long since she’d been underneath him. “Valerie,” he whispered in between kisses.
“hmm?”
“Come home with me tonight.”
He felt her stiffen, and he stopped to look at her uneasy eyes. “What’s wrong?”
She didn’t answer immediately then finally said, “I’m afraid.”
Alex felt his jaw tighten. “About Bruce? Don’t worry, I’ll-”
“No, Alex.” She sat up. “About getting hurt again.”
Alex was up caressing her back in an instant.
“I need more than just sexual relationship.” Her eyes glistened. “I can’t do that anymore.”
Anger and shame crept up Alex’s spine. She was close to tears because of him. He couldn’t even bear to think of how much he’d made her cry in the past. “Baby, you got it. I was going to wait until later, but I’ll put it out there now. I want you to move in with me.” Then he stunned himself by adding. “I love you, Val. Always have.”
Valerie stared at him her lips slightly parted but said nothing. Alex wasn’t done he was going for it all. With a sudden urge to make up for all the hurt he’d caused her or die trying, he declared, “Or marry me. Either way, I don’t want to be apart from you ever again.”
She finally blinked, but her stunned expression didn’t waiver. “Alex, you can’t be serious.”
“I’ve never been more serious in my life.” He could hardly believe he’d just asked her to marry him, but he meant it. He wanted nothing more than to have her in his life forever so why not? “What do you say?”
Valerie seemed thrown. “Alex, you’re all I’ve thought about since the shower. I’ve dreamt of nothing more than being back with you. But moving in? Marriage? That’s a big leap. We’ve never even been able to work out a steady relationship. How do we know—”
“Trust me, sweetheart. I know.” He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it. “I don’t want to go another day without you. I can’t, Val.”
Up until the moment the words had flown out of his mouth, Alex hadn’t even given marriage a thought. But he’d never been surer of anything in his life. He wanted Valerie to be his in every way. He understood now why Angel had been so anxious to make Sarah his wife. If that’s what made him feel whole, made him the happiest man alive, why not make it official?
Valerie stared at him and then down at her small hand that Alex still held firmly. She bit her lip. “Alex, can’t we just start off slow?” She paused when Alex pressed his lips together. “You have to understand. Just allowing myself to open up my heart to you again is terrifying enough.”
Alex hid the incredible disappointment. But he had to admit she had a point. He’d have to prove himself first, and he would to do whatever it took. At least she was willing to give him a chance. That was far more than he expected coming here tonight.
He pulled her too him and hugged her. Feeling her in his arms again was overwhelming. He squeezed her tight and whispered in her ear. “Whatever it takes.”
His hands caressed her back. And he leaned in to kiss her. She let him. When he felt her tongue slip in his mouth, it was all he could do to control himself. Every inch of his body yearned for her, his muscles taut with anticipation. He’d felt lust for her before, but this was entirely different.
Alex would just have to be patient. The last thing he wanted to do was push and have her think he was only anxious for one reason. Although that part of his anxiety had reached the frantic stages. He buried his face in her hair.
The urgency had changed. Strangely, the thought of consummating the relationship as it never had been before, in an exclusive, no qualms, everything out on the table relationship was more overwhelming than anything. It occurred to him he’d never actually had one of those relationships. She’d been the closest he’d ever gotten. All those years he’d managed to screw things up every time things were beginning to really get serious, all because of his stupid pride. He was determined now to show her that all he wanted was her and her alone. She was all he’d thought about since the shower, and he wasn’t going to blow it now.
“We’ll take it as slow as you want, Val. I just hope you believe me when I say that nothing would make me happier than to know you’ll be mine, forever. I’m just sorry it took me this long to figure that out.” The thought of making her his wife and sealing his future with her for good was beginning to sound better and better. It amazed him now that he hadn’t thought about it sooner. But then his hopes for getting her back in his life were frail at best. He pecked her lips. “If I can make you half as crazy as I am about you, I’d be the happiest man in the world.”
She stared at him in disbelief. “Alex I can’t believe all those years you didn’t see that I was. Ever since we first started seeing each other back in high school, you pretty much ruined it for every guy I went out with after that.”