Bones in London - Page 33/130

The door of the private office opened and after a moment closed. It

was, in fact, the private door of the private office, reserved

exclusively for the use of the Managing Director of Schemes Limited.

Nevertheless, a certain person had been granted the privilege of

ingress and egress through that sacred portal, and Mr. Tibbetts, yclept

Bones, crouching over his desk, the ferocity of his countenance

intensified by the monocle which was screwed into his eye, and the

terrific importance of his correspondence revealed by his disordered

hair and the red tongue that followed the movements of his pen, did not

look up.

"Put it down, put it down, young miss," he murmured, "on the table, on

the floor, anywhere."

There was no answer, and suddenly Bones paused and scowled at the

half-written sheet before him.

"That doesn't look right." He shook his head. "I don't know what's

coming over me. Do you spell 'cynical' with one 'k' or two?"

Bones looked up.

He saw a brown-faced man, with laughing grey eyes, a tall man in a long

overcoat, carrying a grey silk hat in his hand.

"Pardon me, my jolly old intruder," said Bones with dignity, "this is a

private----" Then his jaw dropped and he leant on the desk for

support. "Not my---- Good heavens!" he squeaked, and then leapt

across the room, carrying with him the flex of his table lamp, which

fell crashing to the floor.

"Ham, you poisonous old reptile!" He seized the other's hand in his

bony paw, prancing up and down, muttering incoherently.

"Sit down, my jolly old Captain. Let me take your overcoat. Well!

Well! Well! Give me your hat, dear old thing--dear old Captain, I

mean. This is simply wonderful! This is one of the most amazin'

experiences I've ever had, my dear old sportsman and officer. How long

have you been home? How did you leave the Territory? Good heavens!

We must have a bottle on this!"

"Sit down, you noisy devil," said Hamilton, pushing his erstwhile

subordinate into a chair, and pulling up another to face him.

"So this is your boudoir!" He glanced round admiringly. "It looks

rather like the waiting-room of a couturière."

"My dear old thing," said the shocked Bones, "I beg you, if you please,

remember, remember----" He lowered his voice, and the last word was in

a hoarse whisper, accompanied by many winks, nods, and pointings at and

to a door which led from the inner office apparently to the outer.

"There's a person, dear old man of the world--a young person--well

brought up----"

"What the----" began Hamilton.

"Don't be peeved!" Bones's knowledge of French was of the haziest.

"Remember, dear old thing," he said solemnly, wagging his inky

forefinger, "as an employer of labour, I must protect the young an'

innocent, my jolly old skipper."