"Jace," I breathed.
His eyes pierced through mine as he took a step toward me, causing my back to press up against the wall. He ran his tongue over his bottom lip and grabbed the back of my neck, wrapping his fingers in my hair. A gasp escaped my parted lips as he yanked my neck to the side, running his fingers over my skin, and grabbed my hip. "Do you want me?" he questioned, breathless.
I stared at him in disbelief. I didn't know what to say and I was at a loss for words. "I don't...what?" I questioned, feeling lost.
He stared me in the eye, walked me backwards, and softly pushed me onto the edge of my bed. He slowly laid down on top of me, spreading my legs, as he rubbed his hand up my right arm.
The feel of him sent a shiver up my spine and caused my legs to shake as he placed his body between my open legs. His jaw clenched as he leaned in, placing his lips back to mine.
His body pressed into me even more, causing us both to moan into each other’s mouths. Then with shaky hands, he reached under my skirt and gripped my thong in his hand. "I want you so bad," he whispered.
I felt a surge of panic kick in, and without a second thought, I pushed Jace away. What does he want from me? The thought of having sex with Jace scared me, as I had never been scared before.
Jace looked down at me breathless and dripping with sweat. "Did I do something? I'm sorry." He instantly removed his hands from my body and gave me a concerned look. "I would never do anything to hurt you or make you feel uncomfortable."
I turned my head away and suddenly my eyes filled with tears. I had been holding so much back and keeping so much from Jace that I could barely even breathe. "I just can't do this," I cried. "I'm sorry, Jace."
He backed away from me and walked over to the wall. He placed his right arm against it and took a deep breath. "Don't be sorry," he whispered into his arm. "You don't have to do anything that you don't want to do."
I slowly sat up and took a deep breath, looking down at my exposed panties. I pulled my skirt back down and then threw my hands over my face. My body jerked violently as the tears spilled out.
Suddenly, I felt Jace's hands around my face as he pulled me into his chest and kissed the top of my head. He had a way with his hands and he always seemed to cup my face in them. It made me feel safe. "Please don't cry," he whispered. "I didn't mean to upset you." He rubbed his thumb over my moist cheek and looked me in the eye. "I don't want you to be scared around me."
I shook his hand away from my face and turned the other way. I hated the thought of Jace seeing me so vulnerable. I had been trying for so long to be strong. "I'm not," I swallowed. "It's not that I'm afraid of you or to be around you. It's that I'm afraid of getting hurt." I instantly blushed at revealing my feelings toward him. Ones that I wasn't even so sure of yet or what they even meant.
Jace grabbed me by the shoulders and looked me in the eye. Then he pursed his lips and gripped a handful of his hair in his hand. "I'm not going to hurt you. I wouldn't," he paused and bit his bottom lip. "I would never hurt you. I promise."
Unable to stay away from Jace any longer, I leaned into him and gripped the back of his neck. I pulled him against me and rested my head on his shoulder. The comfort of his strong arms made me feel safe. "Thank you," I whispered.
Jace smiled and then pulled me down so that we were both lying down on the bed. Then he reached out and pulled the blanket around us. "I'm staying in here with you," he whispered. Then he grabbed my cut hand and held it to his mouth. "Does it hurt?" His warm breath tickled my hand.
My eyes wandered down to my hand and I shook my head. "No," I began. "It doesn't hurt. Not now at least."
Jace smiled sweetly before he pulled my head down to his chest and sighed. "Can I ask you something without you getting upset?" he questioned, hesitantly.
I felt my heart drop to my stomach. I couldn't say no to Jace after all that he had done for me. I owed him some answers. I took a deep breath and pushed my face further into his chest. "Sure," I whispered.
The room was silent for a minute and I could tell that Jace was trying to figure out the best way to ask me. Perhaps he was afraid of me having some kind of meltdown that he wouldn't be able to handle. He shifted a little to the left before he bent down and kissed the top of my head. "Do you ever miss your parents? I mean... have you ever thought about going home?"
My body stiffened in his arms and my heartbeat skyrocketed. "No," I blurted. "I mean no." I paused and gazed up at the ceiling. "My parents hurt me in ways that you will probably never understand."
Jace clenched his jaw and his whole body stiffened. "I understand it more than you think," he said stiffly. "You saw my sister. Her life wasn't always like that." He paused and ran his hands through his messy hair. Then he let out a deep breath and chewed on his lip ring. "The way that my father was..." He swallowed. "That led my sister and me both to make some bad decisions, ones that we can never take back. I can never bring..." He stopped and pressed his hand to his forehead. I could almost see tears glisten in his eyes.
I slowly sat up and looked into his hurt eyes. His eyes were so full of pain and grief that I somehow managed to forget about my own problems for once. I felt so hurt. Not for myself, but for him.
I pulled myself closer to Jace and wrapped my arms around his body. I just wanted to feel him next to me. It gave me a kind of rush that I had never felt before.
Jace pulled me closer to him so that his lips were against my neck, and we both laid there in a comfortable silence.
Chapter 10
I awoke the next morning wrapped tightly in Jace's strong arms. The feel of his skin against mine made me shiver as I rolled over and out of his grip. Again, I somehow managed to sleep through the whole night without a nightmare or even a thought of my parents. It almost seemed as if Jace kept the nightmares away. As crazy as that seemed, I almost believed it to be true.
A small smile crossed my face as I reached over and shook Jace's shoulder. He looked so sexy lying there sleeping and I almost didn't even want to wake him up, but I knew that I didn't have a choice. "Good morning," I whispered.
Jace slowly opened his eyes and stretched, a smile lit up his rugged features. Then he ran his hands over his chest and adjusted his pants. The bulge in his thin pants made me blush unwantedly, as I turned my eyes away. "What time is it?" He yawned.