Disillusioned - Page 2/68

“It’s a pity I don’t know how your mind works, Jakob,” I said sarcastically, my fear dissipating as I stared at him. He wouldn’t hurt me, would he? He hadn’t hurt me on the island. He hadn’t done anything to make me scared of him. I had to believe that he wasn’t looking to hurt me now. But I couldn’t fathom how I’d given myself to this man. I’d made love to him. I’d trusted him. I could feel hysteria bubbling to the surface as I stared at his naked chest, muscular and toned in the moonlight. Laughter erupted, flowing out of me with abandon, sounding manic and crazy in the still night.

“Bianca?” His eyes narrowed and his face looked worried as I continued laughing.

“That’s my name, Jakob,” I said eventually, after my laughter had subsided and all that was left was a dry throat and a heavy heart.

“What is it you think you know?” He leaned over and I stepped back.

“I don’t think I know. I know that I know.” I glared at him, the anger in me giving me the strength to face him. “I heard you speaking to that man. You told him that Steve deviated from the plan. What plan is that, huh? We were on an island with a crazy man that both of us didn’t know. Now I know that’s not the truth. Now I know that we weren’t both kidnapped. You weren’t there as an innocent bystander with me, were you?” My voice caught as the depths of his deviousness hit me fully. “You could have killed me. I don’t even know you. I don’t know what you’re capable of . . . if you could kidnap me and lie to my face, what else could you do?”

“I would never hurt you, Bianca. You have to believe that. That’s not who I am.” His voice was filled with emotion as he gazed at me, a calm look on his face. How could he be so cool, when everything was crumbling around him? All his lies were coming out now.

“Why did you lie to me?” My voice trembled as I stared at the man I’d just spent a week with, believing that he’d been kidnapped as well. “You knew Steve.” I bit my lower lip as the enormity of that statement hit me. “You knew he didn’t just happen to be lost on the same island. You sent him there to be with us. You planned this.”

“You think I planned your kidnapping and my own?” The surprise in the way he said the words made me feel ridiculous, but I knew what I’d heard.

“And I spoke to David and—well, you’re Mattias, aren’t you?” My voice dropped and I looked out at the night sky. I could see the waves of the ocean crashing against the rocks from where I was standing. The blackness of the sky was illuminated by a million radiant white stars. The setting was as romantic as it could be, yet I felt no appreciation for its beauty.

“You think I’m Mattias?” he asked simply.

I looked into his eyes, seeking out an answer in his dark pupils. “Well, aren’t you? Mattias went to such lengths to avoid me when I was dating his brother—obviously you wanted to keep your identity a secret since you were planning to abduct me.”

“You think Mattias is bad?” He took a small step forward on his balcony.

“I think you’re bad, yes.”

His eyes crinkled then and I saw them narrow for a second before he looked away and mumbled something to himself.

“What did you say?” I asked, unable to stop myself.

“You make this so goddamn hard, Bianca,” he growled. I swallowed nervously. I could see his nostrils flaring as the breeze sent another chill down my spine. My eyes involuntarily fell to his crotch, and when I looked back up, a half smile was on his face. “I didn’t say me.”

“What?” I blushed, looking away from him, an inner heat warming me involuntarily. I stared at some palm trees a couple hundred yards away. They were swaying back and forth and I watched as a coconut fell to the ground.

“I said this situation was hard, not me.” His voice was soft and provocative, trying to lure me back to him.

“I never said you were hard.” I looked back at him, my nerve almost failing when I looked into his eyes and saw the gentle, teasing Jakob I had gotten to know on the island.

“But you were hoping I was, weren’t you?” he teased me again and stepped forward. My heart stopped as he grabbed a hold of the railing in front of him.

“Don’t come over here,” I whispered, my voice cracking. “Please.”

“Why are you scared of me, Bianca? You know I would never hurt you.” His eyes looked sad and I wondered at his being such a great actor. It was almost ironic, with me being a movie critic. I’d witnessed the greatest performance live and in person, but I hadn’t even known I was being played.

“How could you make love to me?” My voice dropped and my legs tingled as I thought about the way he had kissed and caressed me just minutes before. My skin felt warm as I remembered the things he had done with his tongue, and I sighed as my body betrayed me. Trust him, it said. Let him hold you and keep you warm. I closed my eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. I needed to focus. I was like Julia Roberts in Sleeping with the Enemy. I needed to be on high alert. I couldn’t allow him to twist the truth and turn me against myself.

“I made love to you because you’re beautiful. I made love to you because I couldn’t not make love to you. In fact, I want to make love to you right now.” He smiled and then looked at my chest suggestively. “Come, dear Bianca, let’s just go back to bed.”

“Just tell me two things.” I spoke confidently and felt a surge of pride running through my veins as I hid my fear. “Did you know Steve before he showed up on the island with us? And were you really kidnapped?” I waited for his answers, the events of the last week flashing through my mind like a movie on fast-forward.