With a hesitant nod, I hand Penny over. Candy coos to her, bouncing her on her hip before disappearing down the hall. I turn to Dusty, swiping the tears that are leaking from my eyes. He pulls me into his arms. “We’re going to get through this, get that man from your life, and start you and your family again.”
“I hate being here. I hate leaving Mom alone.”
“She’s with your dad; he’ll take care of her.”
“I know, but I’m all she’s got, Dusty.”
He lets me go and cups my face in his hands. “He’ll take care of her.”
I nod, swallowing back my tears. “I should unpack.”
He stares down at my tiny bag. “You need anything?”
I shake my head. “I need to get this over with.”
“You want me to come with you when you . . . face him?”
I shake my head again. “No, thank you. I just want to finish this on my own. You stay with Candy, take care of Penny.”
He nods. “We’ll be the best babysitters ever.”
I laugh softly.
I hope so, because God only knows I’m not going to be the best anything after this.
~*~*~*~
“Are you sure?” Candy asks, taking my hands.
“I just need to do this.”
“Call me if you need, any time.”
“Just take care of Penny. I’ve written everything she might need and—”
Candy squeezes my shoulders. “It’s going to be fine. We’ll take good care of her, won’t we, Ford?”
We both turn to Ford, who is sitting on the couch watching a ball game. He grunts, not looking up at us. I lean in close to Candy. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay here?”
She shrugs. “He doesn’t scare me. Besides, Penny and I are going to dress up and get all girly on him.”
Another grunt from Ford.
I smile and hug her. “I love you, Candice.”
“Yeah, yeah,” she croaks. “You too.”
I pull back and stare down at Penny, who is crawling towards Ford. When she reaches him, she pulls herself up and slams her dolly down on his lap. He stares down at her, then gives me a ‘you’ll pay’ glare. There’s something soft in his eyes, though. I think he likes her. She is his niece, after all.
“Be nice to Uncle Ford,” I coo to Penny. She flashes me a killer smile.
Ford shoots me another look, this one slightly confused. Did he think I wouldn’t acknowledge him as her uncle?
“I have to go.”
I lean down, kissing Penny. Then I turn and hug Candy once more. I’m trying to ignore the sick feeling swirling in my stomach. I don’t want to think about seeing Marcus again. I certainly don’t want to see how his life has turned out.
I don’t even know where I’ll find him, but I know where to start.
“Good luck.” Candy smiles as I lift her car keys.
“Thanks for the car,” I say, my voice trembling.
She gives me a sympathetic smile and I turn, heading out the door.
Here goes the worst moment of my life.
The one I’ve been dreading for so long.
CHAPTER FIVE
MARCUS
THEN
“It’s been five fuckin’ months,” I bellow, launching my glass across the wall. It smashes hard and shatters.
“Dude, calm the fuck down,” Mack mutters, pacing the room, arms crossed.
“Calm down? I fucked her up, she’s gone, she’s closed all her accounts, changed everything. She has no money. They have no money. She’s struggling somewhere and I can’t fuckin’ help.”
Mack looks up at me. “Look, bud, I get the guilt you’re feelin’, but your business is slipping farther and farther into the dirt with every second you waste. She’s gone. You fucked up. Now you have to fix it before you lose anything more.”
I glare at the floor. “It ain’t worth shit without her, Mack.”
“Maybe not, but it’s all you got right now. Walter is movin’ in, you got lawyers on your ass. You gotta end this.”
I lift my head. “End him?”
Mack’s eyes flash. “Is he standing in the way of what you want?”
I jerk my head, a nod.
“Then yeah, we fuckin’ end him. That bastard is the reason Katia found out the way she did; the least you can do for her is make him pay for that.”
“She’s not going to know, so what does it matter?” I grunt.
He shrugs and drops his arms to his side. “No, but you’re still goin’ to do it.”
“If I don’t find her,” I say, my voice low and deep. “If I don’t explain . . .”
“Marcus, you gotta let this shit go.”
“I fucked her up. I destroyed her.”
“Yeah.” He sighs. “You did. You’re livin’ with it. Right now, that’s all you can do.”
Fucker is right.
That’s all I’ve got left.
~*~*~*~
KATIA
The drive towards where Marcus used to live is awful. It’s slow. It’s painful, and I pull over four times dry-retching because I’m sure I’m going to vomit. I don’t, but my stomach coils so tightly the feeling never quite disappears. When I reach the long driveway, I struggle to catch my breath. I’m sure he doesn’t live here anymore, since he lost his business, but I’m hoping whoever does live here will know where I can find him.