‘Why not I turn a new leaf in my life, ironically on lease by Mehrotra’s ruse?’ he thought at length. ‘What of the course correction then? Would I ever imagine hurting any in any manner whatsoever? But would that do to lead a useful life? Well, it’s constructive care that might help erase the debilitating effects of my negative past. What about lending a helping hand to the abused of the world? Maybe, eventually that might put me on the path of redemption, won’t it? God, give me the chance to live and have the conviction to make that my mission in life. Why let me dangle by the rope that I strangled Shanti in sickness? Why not put my life at stake to save another? Won’t Thou grant me this one favor O Lord?’
Suresh’s new found faith in the will of God made him take the maneuvers of Mehrotra with a pinch of salt.
‘Won’t his twisted means justify my upright ends?’ he tried to probe the rights and wrongs of the expected verdict. ‘Or would it be no more than a hoax? What of justice then? Whose justice is it anyway, but that of the statute. And won’t that vary from state to state! Isn’t it in itself a travesty of justice in our imperfect world? But then, who said that it is a just world? If not, why should nature condemn one species as food for another species? What justice is all that? Is it not absurd to suggest that man had evolved equitable laws while God failed to do so? No denying that, my violations on them would have traumatized many, but was it not my sick mind that was the cause of it all? What was worse, it was Shanti’s ranting that provoked me to resort to the crime. Yet her abuse would have been passé for many. But given my psyche, that touched my raw nerve, didn’t it? Whatever, how agonized I am that I had unfairly caused her death! It’s as if the courts can’t account for the penitence of the accused in meting out the punishment. Now that I’m repenting, am I not entitled for a reprieve?’
‘After all, what should be an equitable punishment to a given crime?’ he thought in the same vein. ‘Well, it’s the question that confronts societies. Didn’t it appear logical for long that the offender is subjected to the same hurt he inflicted upon the victim? But, hasn’t a tooth for a tooth and an eye for an eye become out of tune with the sensibilities of our times? A lost tooth or a blind eye would still keep life going for the victim and the violator alike. Wouldn’t the gallows for the murderer deprive life for them both? How to deal with the crime and punishment within the boundaries of life and death is the moot point. Won’t that depend on the proclivities of the one who comes to dispense justice? How lucky, if my case is heard by him who believes that life behind bars would meet the ends of justice. God forbid what if it’s the conviction of the one in the chair that the cause of justice demands the throat of the culprit! Won’t that make him or her murderer of sorts with the judicial tool of a rope?’