I started to say something to recant my use of the word 'crazy', but she cut me off.
"Get some sleep. It will be many hours before we get where we are going." And with that said she turned over and faced away from me.
I felt rotten and I didn't even know why.
I was the one who'd been sensually bushwhacked and then taken advantage of!
The right was on my side!
I lay there for a moment gritting my teeth, but eventually I lost the battle. Nine years of lovingly committed marriage wouldn't let me just lay there and let a wrong go by when I had the power to correct it.
"Keturah?"
No response.
I reached out and grasped her shoulder and pulled her over flat onto her back. She looked a little surprised and guarded all at the same moment.
I glanced down at the netting as eye contact right now was too much, "Of the two of us Keturah I'm the crazy one. I was crazy to come to this place and I'm crazy to attempt to free the slaves on the mainland and no doubt they'll be something else that I do which will be crazy. Anyway what I'm trying to say is, I don't mind being labeled as crazy, but apparently you do. I'm sorry that I evidently hurt you. It was my intention to hurt you and for that I'm doubly sorry. My wife died seven years ago and since then I have been a man full of bitterness and anger and somebody simply not pleasant to be around. You've stated in bold fashion that you want to be my mate. It's an unanticipated occurrence on my part and I don't think you quite understand the ramifications of it, but if it happens I genuinely hope the best for you because you're not getting much in return. I think you should seriously reevaluate whatever decision-making process that has led you to this point and find yourself a younger man that is not so jaded and has more life left in him than I do."
I looked up to see what impact if any my words had on her. The smile was back both in her face and in her eyes and that meant I had failed to dissuade her from seeing me as a poor catch.
"Thank you for apologizing, but I'm not reconsidering my choice of having you for a mate. I'm yours when you want me."
I sighed heavily and glanced away and upwards towards the shifting clouds overhead.
Was God setting me up with this girl or was she just a distraction to be powered through and ultimately ignored?