The Diary Of Pamela D. - Page 81/114

As she gripped the steering wheel, she became conscious of her engagement ring which suddenly felt strange and awkward on her finger, as though it were a large and cumbersome thing that shackled her to commitments and pressures she wasn't up to dealing with. The thought of adding a second and more binding band made her feel increasingly claustrophobic.

And what if Theo soon wanted children? she thought to herself, feeling an ugly thrill of panic in the pit of her belly-

'Careful! Mind your driving; you're wandering too near the shoulder.'

Theo's voice brought her back into the moment, which was the last place she wanted to be, for there lay her fears, her anxieties.

'Here, pull over onto the layby,' he said gently. 'I'd better drive for a while.'

Once again feeling as though she had let him down, as though she were a failure who deserved to fail, she did as he told her, and spent the remainder of the trip staring out the window, wishing she could please him, and that for once in her life she could do something right.