“Scout is a walking cartoon character, because her grandparents are sadists,” I corrected.
“I want a fancy tan.”
I supposed that if I had a third eye in the middle of my forehead she would want one of those too. “You donʼt want a fake orange tan, Munchkin.”
“Yes, I do,” she insisted. “Itʼs pretty.”
Alex was amused. “Oh, I think so too. Very pretty and informative. I have always wondered what the female Oompa-Loompas looked like.”
I kicked his shin under the table. “Donʼt make me whip out my mad ninja skills.” I really didnʼt mind Alex teasing me about my tan gone wrong. It was, after all, the most ridiculous thing anyone had ever seen. Plus, the way he was looking at me at that moment gave me butterflies in my stomach, and I was not one to complain about happy stomach butterflies.
“Youʼre not a ninja anymore.” It had been thirty whole seconds since Alex had paid any attention to Angel, so she had to say something.
“You were a ninja?” Alexʼs eyebrows raised up under his long bangs.
“Yeah, but I had to quit. The whole wearing black from head to toe thing was getting old.” Angel, who had yet to completely understand the concept of sarcasm, felt the need to correct me yet again. “Only your belt was black. Your pajamas were white.”
“Tae Kwan Do?”
“The first couple of years,” I said. “Later we started cross-training. By the time I had to quit we were mostly doing mixed martial arts.”
“So, theoretically you could kick my a...” Alexʼs eyes flicked over to Angel, “butt?”
“Itʼs not so much theory as fact.”
Okay, not really. I was way out of practice, not to mention Alex had some very nice looking muscles peaking out from the sleeves of his faded Abercombie t-shirt and a good three or four inches of height on me.
“Is that an invitation to throw down, Donovan?” Alexʼs smile was positively wicked.
“Name the time and place, Cole.”
His mischievous smile was interrupted by my “Across the Universe” ringtone. I quickly snatched up the phone, petrified Miss Nancy had heard. She had some very strong feelings about cell phones and kicked people out of the library for using them on a regular basis.
“Whatʼs up, Charlie?” I asked quietly, turning around so my back was to the circulation desk and Alex. For some reason I found talking to Charlie in front of Alex unappealing.
“Same as always. You know how this rock star life of mine goes,” Charlie replied.
“Champagne breakfasts every morning and lobster dinners every night. Iʼm actually meeting up with Bono later to cure AIDS, and then weʼre hitting the club scene. I hope the Edge comes along this time. That guy is a seriously awesome wing man.”
“And here I was thinking you would be sitting around in clothes that should have been washed a week ago, eating Ramen noodles, and spending your evenings studying until your eyes bled.”
Charlieʼs laugh seemed to reach every cell of my body. “Damn you and your psychic powers. Although, youʼre a little off. Ramen noodles gross me out. Iʼm on a strict cereal and microwave popcorn diet.”
We bantered back and forth for a few minutes before I managed to steer the conversation to the pragmatic reasons for Charlieʼs unexpected call. Once I told him how to find tangent, relayed the capitals of several South American countries, and explained how most of this information could be found on Wikipedia, I ended the call and turned back around to apologize to Alex for the distraction. I was surprised to find Angel sitting alone, Alex and his stuff gone.
***
The day after Alexʼs disappearing act our Shakespeare class headed down to Nashville to watch Vanderbilt Universityʼs production of The Taming of the Shrew. I was going to ask Alex about what happened and attempt to make up for lost research time on the drive down, but Ashley immediately claimed the spot next to Alex in the back seat. I tried not to think about whether or not it was the first time that they had found themselves in the back seat together as Talley chatted away with Ms. Ryder from our seats in the front.
It was raining by the time we got to the city and, as fate would have it, we had to park more than a mile from the theater. I cursed myself for not wearing my raincoat or bringing an umbrella. I had been out of the van for less than a minute and was soaked. Talley looked ridiculous, but dry, in the odd rain-suit type thing she had packed in her bag.
“Did you not watch the weather this morning?” Alex asked, moving his umbrella so it covered the both of us.
The gesture was appreciated, but I still had an ax to grind. “I was too busy searching for my co-writer. He disappeared while we were supposed to be working on an article yesterday afternoon. I think he must have fallen through a portal to a magical, cell phone free world, since he never called to explain.”
Alex had the good sense to look guilty. “Sorry, it was getting dark, and I didnʼt think you would notice.”
“It was getting dark?” I snickered. “Are you afraid of the Boogey Man?” He scowled. “Iʼm not afraid of anything. I am the Boogey Man.” I was laughing so hard I almost didnʼt hear Ms. Ryder as she doled out tickets and instructions, begging us to act like mature, cultured individuals.
We had to wait for the ushers, who were an even bigger embarrassment to society than my classmates, to finish their flashlight enabled lightsaber duel to actually go into the theater.
When Darth Vader finally found the time to lead us to our seats I was pleased to find myself sitting between Talley and Alex.
“Now, remember ladies, weʼre here to watch a theatrical performance, not to socialize. I do not expect to hear any chit-chat between you two after the lights go down,” Alex said in what would have been a perfect imitation of Ms. Ryder if it hadnʼt had been for a giant yawn at the end.
“And we donʼt expect to hear any snoring from you, Mr. Cole,” Talley chided.
“I donʼt know if I can promise that,” he said. I thought that he was probably telling the truth.
He looked like he hadnʼt slept at all. What was it with guys and insomnia? Jase seemed to be operating on little to no sleep half the time.
Once the house lights went down and curtain came up, it didnʼt take long to understand why Vanderbilt was known for its medical program and not its drama department. By the third act I was in as much danger of falling asleep as Alex was. When I looked over to see if he had nodded off yet I was surprised to find him looking at me.