Breathe into Me - Page 28/64

“It’s going to get a little tricky up here. The path is blocked off by a boulder and we have to scoot around it but I will have hold of you at all times so you won’t need to worry.”

I nervously gulped and nodded. It sounded sketchy, but even in the dark; Kane walked this path with a purpose. His footsteps fell strongly, as if he was confident in every step, so I trusted he would be able to navigate us even in the dark.

After walking a short distance, the path became blocked off by a huge rock like he had said it would. I didn’t see how we would get around it. This rock was huge. It was about as wide as an SUV and taller then Kane.

Kane veered to the right and began scooting his way along the edge of the rock. I stood there for a minute, nervous that even if Kane had hold of me, I would still fall to my death and bring him down with me.

“All right, Kelsey, your turn. Just give me your hand and keep as close to the rock as you can, and you will be fine.”

“Um, okay,” I said as I timidly took a step closer and placed my hand in his waiting hand.

“That’s it. Now just scoot your body along the boulder and keep holding my hand. You’re doing just fine.”

I plastered my body against the rock. I could have had five feet behind me for all I knew, but I couldn’t tell in this darkness. Not taking any chances—shirt be damned—I began sliding my body along that rock.

“That’s it. Almost there,” Kane encouraged me. I had reached the curled edge of the boulder with my fingertips, when I was yanked the last few steps around the rock.

Kane pulled me into his arms. His warm embrace had my heart fluttering and I did the only thing I could think to do at that moment. I looked up into his eyes and said ... “Hi.”

He looked down at me and chuckled. “Hey.”

If I could face palm right now without coming off as a complete spaz, I would. Before I could die of any more embarrassment, Kane turned, unwrapped his arms from around me, and took my hand before leading me on down the path.

It didn’t take long before we got to the area Kane had wanted to show me. The view was breathtaking. It overlooked the college and the town. The twinkle of the lights from the cars traveling below and the street lights made the town look almost serene. Like something out of a movie.

“Wow, Kane, this is beautiful,” I said as I slowly made my way to the edge of the rock to take a quick peak down.

Yep, just as I thought. High, we were very high. My stomach flipped from the sight, and I slowly backed away from the edge, yelping when my body connected with something.

“Is this how we are going to spend the rest of our lives? You always bumping into me?” We both smiled and Kane nodded toward a smaller rock off to the side. “You wanna sit for a little while? Take in the view?”

“Sure.”

We both had a seat, and Kane threaded his fingers through mine. I smiled down at our hands. It was like they were made for each other. They fit together like a piece of a puzzle.

“I haven’t been here in months,” Kane said as he looked out over the view. “I don’t know why, and up until this morning I hadn’t really given this place much thought. But then you were the first thing that came to my mind when I woke up this morning and it felt right to bring you here.”

“Thank you for sharing your special place with me and for your honesty back there.” I took a deep breath before I continued. “But since you were so open with me it’s only fair that I do the same.”

“Kelsey, I told you that because I wanted you to know me. The real me. Not the things that you would hear about me around school. You don’t have to tell me anything you’re not ready to. That’s not what this is about.”

I held up my hand to stop him. “I want to tell you, Kane, because honestly there may be times that I might try pulling away from you; and what I am about to tell you might explain why. All I have wanted for the past six years is to get away from my past and start over where no one knew anything about me. But I can’t keep this going with you like we are, and not be honest with you. It wouldn’t be fair for either of us. All my life I grew up watching my father beat my mother. She always tried to keep it hidden from me when I was younger. She would play it off like mommy and daddy were just playing, but as I got older I began to understand what was happening. None of my friend’s moms had bruises on them from playing with their daddies, and as I got older the beatings began to get worse. At first he would only hit or grab her in the places she could hide the marks, but over time he began to get angrier more often and started hitting her anywhere he could land a hand. She was so brave, though. I don’t want you to think she was weak because she never turned him in. My mother was the bravest person I know. She put up with him because of me. She never said it, but I know it’s true. She didn’t want to risk having to share custody with him. So as long as she was taking the beating she stayed.”

My voice began to crack but I kept going. “One night when I was twelve I wanted to go out with Jessi and her family for her brother’s birthday dinner. They had already invited me and my mom said I could go, but when my dad got home he was in a pissed-off mood and began cursing at my mom about how our spotless house was never clean enough and how she was lazy. I couldn’t take it anymore, and I finally snapped and started arguing with him. I began telling him how be better leave my mom alone or I would call the cops and tell them all the things he had been doing to her all these years. My mom was telling me to be quiet and to just go to Jessi’s; but once I got started I couldn’t stop.

All my hatred for him was spilling out of me, and I just kept telling him exactly what I thought of him and how he would end up in jail and we would finally be rid of him. He came at me with his hand drawn back to hit me, and when I cowered away from him, my mom stepped up between us and slapped him straight across the face. It was the loudest crack I had ever heard, and right away my mom knew things were going to get bad. She turned to me and told me to run. To get out of the house and get help and not look back. I didn’t want to leave her, but I didn’t know what else to do. So I ran. When I got to the door, I looked back and saw my dad grab my mom by her hair and yank her head back.” The tears were spilling from my eyes and I didn’t try to stop them. There was no point. “He grabbed her by her neck and began to squeeze. He was shouting but I couldn’t hear any of it. All I could hear was my pounding heart and my mother gasping as she tried to pull air into her lungs. I just stood there and watched as he squeezed her neck so tight and so hard that her face started to turn blue. I just stood there and watched as her body went limp in his arms and her eyes became unfocused. I just stood there and watched as my mother was murdered.”