Chasing Imperfection (Chasing 2) - Page 55/63

“I know….doll. But come on! Anyhow, get your cute bum here before I decide to come and get you and end up getting lost around here. Gawd, you never said London had some totally cute men! Okay—the guys are hollering me to finish. Kyle’s taking us out—see you soon doll and be quick!” Jen immediately ended the call before I had the chance to say a word.

I grunted in frustration. I’m a little pissed at Kyle for not mentioning Jen and now I’m antsy about telling Blake that I’m about to head out and meet my friends, Kyle included.

“Sienna?” Blake strode in but instantly stopped when he saw me in my almost naked state. He swallowed, his eyes darkened and roved boldly over my body.

Yeah, buster! You’ve missed out on this for awhile, haven’t you? I thought provokingly. I didn’t even bother putting on a robe. What’s the point?

Since I felt a little naughty and his reaction gave me enough boost to confidently taunt him. HA! “Did you want something, Blake?” my voice, throaty and seductive. Inviting.

His eyes lingered at my br**sts a tad longer before his eyes landed on mine. My, my, he’s certainly having a hard time concentrating. His arousal was obvious against his black Armani slacks. “I, uh—came to tell you that,” he cleared his throat, “I’m going away for three weeks to America, New York and Texas specifically then Brazil. I’ll join everyone in France before Christmas.”

Three weeks? That long…without him? Shit.

He cleared his throat again. Was he nervous or something? “That is if you’re joining us in France. Are you going to?”

Toby did text me this morning but I haven’t decided yet. I know Chad and Luke are going with them. Luce? I had no clue yet—most probably not, given the obvious situation.

Three weeks. HUH. “I haven’t thought about it. Toby sent me an invite but I haven’t responded.” I bit my lip, my brows furrowed.

This is so weird. Is it going to be like this between Blake and me from now on? Just plain….weird?

“I see. Right.”

“When are you leaving?” my voice squeaked.

“In a few hours, I actually came back to pack.”

I simply nodded. “I’m just going to change and I’ll be out. I know your closet is on the other side—but you know—in case you need space or something.” Blake placed his hands inside his pockets and leaned on the mirrored wall.

“Off to somewhere? Mind if I ask your destination?”

Ick. I turned around and pretended to go through my clothes. “I’m off to see my friends from back home who are visiting. They’re all staying at Kyle’s. So…..yup.”

‘So…..yup?’ Seriously, Sienna? Fudge.

Blake was behind me in an instant. His heat radiated off me. He was so close but yet so far. I closed my eyes and tried to calm my jumbled thoughts. Things are harder when it’s the guy who decided to stop touching you. When it’s the other way around, men can easily seduce the woman into submission. I mean, I could try seducing him—but I’m nearly naked now and still he doesn’t touch me. My confidence just took a nosedive along with my ego.

“Are you going to be staying there, with him?” His tone was very low, but the underlying threat and anger was evident.

“No. I’ll be back to sleep here, if that makes you….comfortable?” I was going to say happy, but I’m not too sure anymore. Nothing with Blake made sense any more.

“Make sure that you do. There will be a car and a driver waiting for you downstairs once you’re done. Use that while I’m not here. I don’t want to hear any more incidents, Sienna. Do I make myself clear?”

Crystal. Incidents meaning Kyle Matthews. Why doesn’t he take my word for it? He and I weren’t even together! Yet he acts like we were together, married or something when I did it. I know it’s not an excuse….but what was I supposed to do? FML!

“Whatever, Blake, Are you about done? I need to hurry up and get dressed. I don’t want to keep Kyle waiting!” I snapped back at him and tried to move away but he caged me before I got away.

He growled like an animal next to my ear. His hot body pressed against mine, hard. His arousal pressured against the back of my hips. My body primitively melted at the feel of his burning hot groin. “Don’t play games with me. I’m not to be trifled with, Sienna!”

I swallowed, a bit unsettled. “I was merely joking, Blake,” I whispered.

“Well, I bloody wasn’t joking. Choose wisely, if you must! Pay heed my beautiful one because there will be no next time.” I did choose him. I did, didn’t I? Then why was he acting like a brute?

I turned around and faced Blake. “Why are you being so difficult?” If looks could kill, I would’ve been six feet into the ground in a second.

“Because I do not f**king TRUST you!” he thundered, eyes almost dark as the night.

“I know. Don’t you think I don’t know that? These last few days proved that. If you don’t want to be with me—then say so! Don’t keep me hanging like this. I agreed to be with you because I didn’t think it’d be like this. I don’t want to be with you if you’re going to treat me like dirt!!!

“I love you, but….I can’t degrade myself anymore than I have already. I’m worth more than that. I am more than that! So, let me go. Let’s just walk away before we ruin ourselves more.” My eyes stared at his dress shirt button. I couldn’t look at him or I might just fall apart and be back in his blinding spell.

My throat constricted. “Let me go, Blake,” I whispered.

This has to end. This madness has to stop. We’re hurting each other more as time goes on.

“I….can’t. No. I cannot let you go.” His voice shook against my forehead. “My actions for the last few days have been loathsome to say the least—but you must understand the strain and the type of wretchedness I’m under. Every night, I come to bed angry and frustrated as hell. I want you—I yearn to touch you but it’s hard for me to do so.”

“Then touch me—I need to feel you, just something….to be close to you.”

“I can’t,” he said, hollowed and pained.

I guess there’s nothing more to say is there? I thought as I nodded and fled the closet. I locked myself in the darkened bathroom and cried silently. This is the worst kind of rejection to endure. Why the hell was I holding on to something that’s not there anymore? Scolding and berating myself at the same time. My desperation and my addiction to be with him won against common sense. Am I that pathetic? If he didn’t want me, then why the heck does he want me around? He probably wants a lap dog or an adoring fan that thought the world of him. I fitted and checked on all counts moronic.