"You're not a prisoner." That was the second time I'd had to say that.
Her right hip shot out and her hand landed on her waist. "Then what do you call this?"
"Would you like to come in and talk?"
"What?" she asked with the same pissed off expression that now mixed with what looked like a flash of fear in her eyes.
"Would you like to come in? You slept in here for months, Nina. I promise. You liked it here."
"Do you plan to answer my question if I come in there?"
"Sure."
I opened the door and held my arm out to welcome her to the room where we'd spent hours falling in love. As always, I couldn't stop myself from hoping that she'd remember some shred of our past together.
"Would you like to sit down?" I asked as I dragged the chair away from the desk near the window.
She squinted her eyes at me and appeared to consider my offer of a seat. "I guess it couldn't hurt."
As she sat down in the chair in front of me, I had to fight the urge to slide my hands over her shoulders and lean down to kiss her like every fiber of my being wanted to. I stood for a few seconds wishing so much to touch her until the heaviness in my heart made it hard to breathe and I forced myself to move away. My feet felt like they were wading through wet cement as I came around to sit on the bed in front of her.
"So you were about to tell me how this isn't me being held prisoner," she said sharply as she folded her arms across her chest.
So much for memories of love.
I turned to point at her painting hanging on the wall. "That's yours. You painted that for me, and I loved it so much I had it hung there so I can see it every night before I fall asleep and every morning when I wake."
She looked at the painting and tears welled in her eyes. "I painted that for you?"
Nodding, I smiled. "You did. Do you want to know what you said the colors represented?"
Nina got up from her chair and walked over to stand in front of the painting. She stared at it for a long moment and looked back at me. "Those are your eyes. I've never seen eyes like yours—that color brown. There's no way I would've painted those two brown areas without wanting them to represent your eyes."
"That's right."
Turning back to face the painting, she asked, "What do the blues and reds symbolize?"
"You said they represented the emotions I made you feel."
She looked at me and a look of pain crossed her face. "Like hot and cold?"
"Sort of. I guess I can be difficult to be around sometimes."
Wiping a tear on her cheek, she shook her head and came back to sit in front of me. "I never paint for anyone I'm dating. The only man I've ever painted for was my father. If I painted this for you, I must have..."
She tried to choke back the tears, but she couldn't stop them and as they began to stream down her face, she ran out before I could do anything to make her feel better. I knew how she felt. The frustration. The loss. I didn't know if I should run after her since the doctors had repeatedly told me to give her time, but I couldn't let her sit over in that room alone crying about us when I was feeling as bad as she was at what we'd lost.
When I got to her room, she was sitting on the edge of her bed with her head in her hands, her body heaving from her sobs. Watching her like this broke my heart, and I couldn't stand there and do nothing. Whatever her doctors thought they knew, they didn't understand what it was like to watch the woman you love fall apart.
I sat down next to her and pulled her close to me. She didn't fight me and buried her head in my chest as she continued to cry. Trailing my fingers over her soft hair, I moved my hands to her back and held her to me, never wanting to let her go. She was my Nina.
"I hate this. You don't know what that painting means, Tristan," she sobbed into my shirt. "I never paint for others. I've always been too afraid to. This means I did feel everything Jordan says I did."
Pressing my lips to the top of her head, I kissed her softly and whispered, "Then that's a good thing, isn't it?"
Leaning back away from me, she shook her head. "No, it isn't! We were in love and now it's gone. I can't remember you or anything about this house or what we felt for each other. It's like it's a dark space where so much good is sitting there waiting for me and I can't find it."
"The doctors said it might take a little while."
"I don't want to wait a while! I had a life and now I have nothing. I sit over in this room and feel like I have nobody and nothing to hold on to."
I cupped her chin and smiled down into that beautiful sad face. "You have me. Hold on to me."
"I'm no fool, Tristan. I may not remember things, but I'm not an idiot. I know who you are. I looked it up. You're a bajillionaire. What would you want with someone like me?"
"Bajillionaire?" I asked, unable to stifle a smile.
"It's a word. It means you have more money than I could ever make in twenty lifetimes and I have no business believing you'd ever want me, a wannabe artist and curator."
"It's not a word, and as for me wanting you, you have every business believing it. People don't fall in love in spite of money, Nina. I can tell you I have absolute proof that money can make people very attractive, even when they aren't."
"You're intentionally twisting my words. You know what I meant."
"So because I have money, I can't fall in love? Is that what you meant?"
Nina wiped her eyes and shot me a look of reproach. "What would you want with someone like me?"
"Yeah. What would I want with a gorgeous woman who makes me crazy every time she's anywhere near me? Who'd want that?"
"Hmmph. Gorgeous. I probably look like a deranged raccoon right now, and even if I didn't, I don't look like any of those women you go to those parties with. I saw them, Tristan. They look like supermodels."
"And they're as boring as that dresser. They think I'm pretty boring too."
"They don't look bored. They look like they adore you."
"Good. At least I know that's money well spent."
She wrinkled her nose at me, letting me know I was going to have to be more convincing. "Nina, I pay those women very nicely to look happy with me. They want to be seen at influential parties and the board of directors of Stone Worldwide thinks a man should have a woman on his arm at all times. So I do. If it means anything, I had basically stopped going to those events before your accident because I didn't want to go with the actresses anymore."
"I don't understand. If you loved me so much, why didn't you take me? Is it because I don't look like those women?" she asked with hurt in her eyes.
Shaking my head, I couldn't help but smile. This was definitely the same old Nina. "I know you don't remember this, but you asked me the same thing once, so I'll tell you again what I told you that night. You're gorgeous, and I'd be happy to be seen anywhere on this Earth with you. But being in the spotlight like that has never been good for relationships. I didn't want that to damage what we had together. In my defense, I did ask you to come with me once and you didn't want to. I had to convince you."
Nina hung her head and sighed. "This is so hard, Tristan. What if I never remember all of that time you remember?"
"Then we make new memories together."
The look she gave me was filled with fear. "Do you still love me? Am I the person you fell in love with?"
I didn't have to think about my answer. I knew it in my heart. "Yes. I love you, even though you don't remember me or feel the same. And it wouldn't matter if you changed. I'd still love you as much as I did the first time I realized I'd found the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with."
Wiping the tears from her cheeks, she smiled. "I think I know why I fell in love with you."
Her shy smile made me want to take her in my arms and never let her go. "Yeah? Let me guess. It's the way I wear a suit."
"No, but now that you mention it, you do look good in your clothes."
"My great house and the stoic butler that comes along with it?" I joked.
"No, but the house is great."
For the first time she touched me intentionally, sending a shot of excitement racing up my arm. Every clever comment left my head and I stared down at her wanting to press my lips to hers in a kiss that would take her breath away.
"I bet I fell in love with you because of the way you say what's in your heart."
Nothing could have been further from the truth. Shaking my head, I looked away, unable to face her. I couldn't handle feeling like a fraud at that moment.
"Tristan, did I say something wrong?"
I turned back to look at her and forced a smile. "No. How about we say you'll start work tomorrow morning? Nine sharp sound good?"
"Aren't you the boss? Shouldn't you be telling me instead of asking me?" she asked with a sexy grin that made me want to throw her down on the bed and show her exactly who was boss.
Standing, I looked down at her. "You're right. Be in my office at nine and be ready to work. If you need anything tonight, you know where I am."
I'd been right after all. Whether she knew it or not, she wanted the man I'd been all along. Starting tomorrow, I'd be that man again.
Chapter Three
Nina
Tristan left me sitting on my bed wishing that I'd had the nerve to lean in and kiss him when he told me he loved me. I may not have remembered being with him, but my body reacted every time he was nearby, every inch of me wanting to feel his touch, and just hearing him profess his love for me had made my body launch into overdrive.