“Doing it for your mom, huh?”
“Yeah, let’s just stick with that story for now. I’m not used to this relationship bullshit.”
“Thanks, man,” I say as I pat him on the arm.
“Congratulations,” he says, and I can tell his mind has wandered off to somewhere else; probably worries about the baby.
I can’t even imagine how nervous he must be about having a baby with Senia, having to meet all her family and try to be good enough. I’m nervous as shit about Claire being pregnant and I don’t have anyone to impress except for her.
“Hey, Claire is pregnant. Don’t tell anyone. I’m going to tell everyone at the reception.”
He smiles as he slowly nods his head. “You just had to outdo me, didn’t you? Now what? I’m gonna have to get married on a fucking tightrope?”
“I’ll be there to cut the rope.”
The wedding planner storms into the tent, her black hair flying behind her and a frenzied look on her face. “What are you guys doing? The song has been playing for ten minutes!”
I try not to laugh as I follow her and Tristan out to the other tent. Tristan walks in ahead of me and I smile and nod at all the people I recognize. Most of these people are here for Rachel and Jake. I didn’t want to invite a bunch of people. Didn’t want to risk the location leaking to reporters. I think we did well.
I take my place on the altar and, of course, Joel is not standing there. The music stops and a hush falls over the crowd. The anticipation builds with every passing second, until a new song begins to play. I picked this song especially for Claire and made extravagant promises to Rachel to get her to record the piano and vocals: “In Your Eyes.” The first song I ever played for Claire.
Joel enters first and waits as Claire enters behind him. The smile on her face as she slips her arm through his arm just about does me in.
She bites her lips as she walks down the aisle with Joel. She’s nervous. Every step she takes feels like an hour. I just want to get married and get on with our lives together.
She finally makes it to the altar and Joel kisses her on the cheek before he takes his place atop the altar. I glance at the front row of guests to see my mom’s reaction and she’s a blubbering mess. I take Claire’s hand to help her up the two steps onto the altar and she alternates between smiling and chewing on her bottom lip.
Joel launches into his opening, but I have no idea what he’s saying. All I can hear is the thrumming of my heartbeat in my ears. All I see is Claire as our eyes are locked on each other. A moment later, Joel taps my arm and nods his head.
Jake’s nephew, Grayson, steps forward and hands us our rings. Claire shakes her head as I hand her the ring I picked for myself. The ring I pulled out of a Capri-Sun box a few days ago has been turned back into a wedding ring with the words “My Everything” engraved on the inside. We each slide the rings onto each other’s fingers, both of our hands shaking with nerves.
Joel nods at me again. It’s my turn. I take a deep breath as I prepare to bare my soul to Claire in front of a hundred people.
“I’ve been waiting for this moment for a long time,” I begin. “Writing and rewriting these vows until my fingers were numb.”
Claire squeezes my fingers and I block out everything and everyone else except for her.
“I can’t believe we’re here. I spent so many months thinking this would never happen. So many nights afraid that I had lost you forever. But I think that deep down I always knew this would happen for us.
“The day you walked into our house almost six years ago was the day my world changed. Since that day, I have come to know every piece of you and I’ve loved every inch of you. I’ve counted the stars with you and I’ve counted the days, hours, and seconds I was away from you. And after everything we’ve been through, I have no doubt that I will love you, every bit of you, until the day I die. When the skies collapse and the Earth ceases to exist, I will still love you.”
I bring her hand to my lips and she smiles. “To love is to destroy pain. I love your heart.”
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Claire
Listen
My entire body begins to tremble with nervous energy. Chris rubs his thumbs over the tops of my hands and I close my eyes as I take a few deep, calming breaths. When I open my eyes, the air in the tent is completely still and quiet. Chris mouths, “I love you,” and I begin.
“Well, I did not expect this.” A few chuckles from the crowd don’t distract me as I continue. “So, obviously, I don’t have any vows prepared.” I squeeze Chris’s hands and look him in the eye. “But the more I think of it, the more I know that there is only one thing I want to say to you right now, and that is… thank you.
“Thank you for giving me a home. Thank you for being so patient with me. Thank you for loving me when I didn’t think I deserved it. Thank you for being my friend, my love, my home, and my hope.”
I swallow the lump in my throat and try to blink away the tears.
“There is actually only one line I’ve had prepared for this day. I’ve had it tucked away in the back of my mind for a couple of years. But you can’t make fun of me, ‘cause it’s in French.”
Chris chuckles and the sound of his laughter sends a chill over my skin. I love that sound. I let go of his hand and bring my hands up to gently cradle his face.
“Au milieu de l’hiver, j’ai découvert en moi un invincible été…. In the depths of winter, I discovered in me an invincible summer. That’s you. Thank you for being my invincible summer.”
I kiss him as if nobody is watching, slowly and tenderly. And the way he kisses me back makes me wonder if Chris invented the kiss. When we pull away from each other, I finally hear the applause and the cheering as Chris rests his forehead against mine.
“Forever,” he whispers, then he lays a soft kiss on the tip of my nose and I can hear cameras flashing all around us.
“Happy New Year,” I whisper.
By the time we give hugs and say thanks for all the well wishes, it’s almost one in the morning. Half the wedding party has left, but the other half is alive and enjoying the open bar in the reception area. Chris and I sit on the edge of the stage, off to the far left so we’re not sitting in front of the gigantic speakers. He holds my hand as I remember the moment just ten minutes ago when we danced to “Bring Me Home.”
My fingers are laced through his as I lay my head on his shoulder. Immediately, Chris gently pushes my head off his shoulder.
“Nope. No falling asleep right now. We still have one more piece of news to deliver. Remember?”
“And how are we going to do that?”
“How else? We’re gonna sing.”
I laugh as he gets to his feet and holds his hand out to me as he stands on the edge of the stage. I take his hand and allow him to pull me up.
“I’ll kill you if you make me sing something corny.”
He laughs as he approaches the DJ. I was very glad to see that they didn’t hire a wedding singer or band for the reception, but the collection of instruments on the stage next to the DJ equipment did draw some suspicions. As soon as the DJ fades out the music, Rachel and Jake begin to climb the steps onto the stage.
Chris smiles as he walks back toward me, his coat gone, shirt sleeves pushed up, his guitar slung across his body, and two wireless microphones in his hand. He hands me one of the microphones and my heart feels as if it’s going to explode.
“What the hell is going on?”
“Do you remember the lyrics for ‘Your Song’?”
I think back to the night Chris sang “Your Song” to help me fall asleep. I had never heard the song before and he was so disappointed in my lack of musical culture that he insisted I learn the lyrics to sing along with him.
He flashes me a devilish grin as he hands me the microphone. “You take the first verse.”
“I know.”
“Just making sure,” he says as he tucks his microphone into the stand and adjusts the height.
Rachel winks at me as she positions her fingers over the piano keys and I cover my mouth as I giggle nervously. I look out across the crowd of people staring at us; most of their eyes, and cameras, are fixed on me. Chris is the performer. There’s no chance he’s going to mess this up. They’re all going to watch me so they don’t miss the exact moment my voice cracks or I flub the lyrics.
Chris grabs my hand and looks me in the eye. “Relax. It’s just you and me and the rest of our lives.”
A deep hush settles over everyone before Rachel plays the first notes, a soft and golden tapping, a melody that burrows into my chest.
My voice cracks slightly on the last note of the first line, but no one seems to notice or care. Throughout the entire first verse, my throat constricts painfully as I think of how all the dreams Chris and I had are coming true. He smiles softly as he strums his guitar. He’s gushing with pride as he watches me sing, but it only makes me more nervous.
Chris’s eyes are glossy as he begins the second verse. We harmonize on the beginning of the second chorus, and Rachel pounds the keys to drive us toward the finish. Once the tears begin, I have to stop halfway through the chorus, but Chris continues for both of us.
He lets go of his guitar and slowly kneels before me as he sings the last two lines to my belly. He lays a soft kiss on my belly and looks up at me with a joyful gleam in his eyes.
The sound of sobbing gets our attention and we look out to see Jackie crouched down about ten feet away from the stage, her hands covering her mouth and Joel at her side. He helps her stand up and Chris and I make our way down to the dance floor.
“I knew it,” she says as we approach.
Chris hugs her as he whispers in her ear. “Congratulations, Grandma.”
She smacks his arm and he laughs as he lets her go. “She’s going to call me Grandma.”
“We don’t know if it’s a she yet,” Chris corrects her.
“It’s a girl. I can see it in your face,” she says to me, and I think of all the times people said that to me when I was pregnant with Abby. “And she’s going to be the luckiest girl in the world.”
Jackie wraps her arms around me and, in that moment, I know that everything will be okay.
In that moment, I am home.
Epilogue #1
Adam
Listen
My fingers whisper over the velvety skin on Lindsay’s belly and she smiles as she opens her eyes. I kiss her hipbone and she grabs my hair to pull me on top of her. Her arms curl around my shoulders as she buries her face in my neck. I slide my arms under her back to squeeze her and she wraps her legs around my hips to return the favor.
“Good morning,” she whispers.
“I don’t want to go to the beach,” I reply as I tilt my head back so I can study her face. “Let’s stay in today and I’ll make you breakfast.”
She laughs, a hearty, sexy laugh that never ceases to make my heart race. “I’ll pass.”
“You’ll pass the honey after I make you some tea to go with your delicious breakfast.” I kiss her neck and she rakes her nails softly over my back. “Why are you always wearing panties? I told you to stop wearing panties to bed.”
“If you insist,” she murmurs as she removes her panties. I laugh as she awkwardly uses her feet to push my boxers down. “I guess you’ll have to check on the baby every time she wakes up.”
I slide into her and she moans as she throws her head back. “Fine, you can wear panties every other day.”
I suck on her throat and she whimpers as I thrust deeper with each stroke. She squeezes her thighs tighter around my hips and grinds into me. I lick the hollow of her neck and she smiles as she grabs my ears to pull my mouth against hers.
“How hard do you want it today?” I ask.