“Why would you do that?”
I stare at her for a moment, hoping she’ll figure it out so I don’t have to say it. It takes her a moment before her mouth drops open.
“You… you got it for—”
“Please don’t say his name.” I let out a long sigh. “I didn’t want you to stop coming over to visit my mom just because I was gone and you had a new boyfriend. And I sure as hell didn’t want you two sleeping in my bed. And now that I think about it, I can’t even believe I did this. Now I want to burn this fucking bed.”
She looks puzzled for a moment before she starts laughing.
“There is nothing funny about this.”
She moves toward the bed and I reach for her hand. She looks over her shoulder at me.
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to laugh. This is actually really sweet of you.”
“Can we go to my room?”
She tilts her head as she looks at me. She reaches up and brushes her thumb over my eyebrow.
“Thank you for thinking of me,” she whispers.
I turn my face and kiss the delicate skin on the inside of her wrist. She looks at me and I see her breathing quicken.
“I was serious when I said I would do whatever it took.”
I drop the crutches to the floor and clutch her face as I pull her lips against mine. Her lips are so soft and taste like coffee with a hint of maple syrup. I slide my hand behind her neck as I slip my tongue farther into her mouth. She moans softly as her hands find the bottom of my T-shirt.
“I love you so much, Claire,” I say as I kiss her jaw. “I will always love you. I want you to be mine.”
I bite her neck softly and she gasps. “You shouldn’t be standing like that,” she says as she pulls me toward the bed.
I walk on my cast across the room until we reach the bed. I don’t know if I’m in pain because all I can feel is my need for her. She lies on the bed and pulls me down on top of her.
“I officially claim this bed for you and me,” I whisper in her ear as I settle myself between her legs. I kiss her hard and she grinds her hips into me. “And now I’m going to claim you.”
“Oh, God, Chris,” she whimpers as she pushes my shoulders back and looks me in the eye. “Please don’t hurt me.”
“What? Why would I hurt you?”
“No, not today. I mean, later. Please don’t leave me again.”
I kiss her forehead then look at her for a moment.
“You are so beautiful.” I brush her hair away from her face and kiss her cheekbone. “The first time we had sex I had that song ready to sing to you, but I was so nervous that I was going to mess up.” I kiss her chin and she sucks in a sharp breath. “When I finished singing and you kissed me, I thought I was dreaming. I didn’t think there was any possible way that you could still love me after I fucked up that song so badly.” She smiles and I lay a soft kiss on the corner of her mouth. “That’s how I feel right now. I can’t believe you still love me after I fucked up so hugely. I will never do anything to jeopardize that again. That is my promise to you. If you’re mine, you’re mine forever.”
She shakes her head as she closes her eyes and I brace myself for the rejection. The silence kills me as she leans her head back. A tear rolls down her temple and I quickly wipe it away.
She opens her eyes and my pulse pounds in my ears as I await her response. “I missed you so much.”
I kiss her slowly, savoring the sweetness and movement of her lips, letting my mind take me back to all the moments we lay in this room kissing. This feels, if it’s even possible, better than all those other times. We’ve hurt each other and stumbled over our emotions and our words, but we’ve both grown. We’re still here, together, the way we always imagined it would be.
“I thought I had lost you forever,” I whisper as I move down to kiss her throat. I slip my hand under her shirt and her skin is so soft, I can’t wait to taste her. “Can I take this off?”
She nods and sits up a little so I can pull her shirt off. She lies back and, with her blonde hair fanned out against the pillow and her breasts burgeoning from her white bra, she looks like an angel. I take her breast in my hand and slide my finger between her breast and her bra to expose her nipple. I take her nipple into my mouth while keeping my eyes on her face to watch her reaction. She closes her eyes and lets out a small gasp.
I suck gently as I slide my hand under her back to undo the clasp on her bra. When the clasp is unhooked, I slowly slide her bra straps off her shoulders then toss her bra to the floor.
“Tell me you love me,” I say as I trace my finger lightly over the skin between her breasts and all the way down to the button of her shorts.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Claire
CHRIS HOOKS HIS FINGER UNDER the waistband of my shorts then unbuttons them with one hand as he stares at me, waiting for me to say what he wants to hear. I love Chris. There is no doubt about that. But something feels different.
He slides my zipper down and I place my hand over his to stop him. “Wait.”
He immediately moves his hand up to my waist. “What’s wrong?”
I suddenly feel exposed, lying here with my breasts uncovered in my old bedroom. I grab the front of his shirt and pull him down on top of me, to cover me up, then I wrap my arms around his neck.
“Claire, what’s wrong?”
I squeeze my eyes shut and hold him tight. “I want you. I do, but I don’t know if I can do this.”
He plants a soft kiss on my shoulder then whispers in my ear, “We don’t have to do anything. We can just lay here.” He kisses my jaw then pulls his head back to look me in the eye.
His gaze wanders over my entire face and I allow myself to do the same. He’s definitely the pretty boy in the band, even with all his tattoos and the lip ring. He’s just too beautiful to be scary. He bites his bottom lip, the way he does when he’s turned on, and now I have to have him.
“I love you,” I whisper as I cradle his face in my hands.
It hurts so bad to admit this because I still love Adam, but I can’t deny myself the happiness I know I’ll have with Chris for something that may never happen with Adam. He gave up on me when I needed him. I know Adam thought he was doing it for the right reasons, but I’m not sure I believe those reasons.
Chris kisses my temple then lays a soft trail of kisses along the side of my face until his lips are next to my ear. “You make me so happy,” he whispers before he nips my earlobe. “Let me make you happy.” His fingers skim over my ribs and I shudder. “I want you so bad. Do you want me?”
I nod vigorously. “Yes.”
His hand slides down my waist until he reaches the waistband of my shorts. “I’m going to go slow,” he says as he kisses my neck and gently tugs my shorts down. “Can I take these off?”
I nod again and he smiles as I lift my hips for him to remove my shorts. He leaves my panties on and takes his shirt off, which only gets me hotter with anticipation. I can’t take my eyes off the tattoo on his chest. He takes my hand and kisses my palm before he lays my hand over his heart.
“Hold on tight, babe.”
He positions himself between my legs and slides his hand behind my knee to pull my leg up. He kisses the inside of my knee and I’m breathing so hard I think I might pass out. His fingers brush the inside of my thigh as they travel up and find my panties. He leans down to kiss me as his fingers stroke me through the soft cotton so gently I feel as if I might burst with frustration.
I grab his hand and pull it out from between my legs. “What are you doing? I’m ready.”
He smiles and shakes his head. “I’m going to take my time and you’re going to like it.” He kisses me again, but this time he slides his hand inside my panties and eases two fingers into me. “You’re so wet.”
“You’re killing me.”
He chuckles into my mouth and I can’t help but laugh, until his fingers find my clit. “Can I take your panties off?”
“You don’t have to keep asking. Just do it.”
He slips my panties off and tosses them over his shoulder. “You might want to grab that pillow so you have something to bite down on because I’m about to make you come so hard.”
“Chris?”
“What?”
He’s never spoken to me like this before and it’s both shocking and extremely sexy. Unfortunately, I can’t help but wonder how many other girls have heard this exact line from him. But it’s too late now. I have to do this or it will drive me crazy.
“Don’t stop.”
He smiles as he leans down to kiss me and I wrap my legs around him. His jeans rub against me as he rocks his hips back and forth on top of me. I moan as his kiss becomes hungrier, his mouth seeking that seed of longing deep inside me. His hand roams over my breast and down my waist until he finds my butt. He pulls me into him, his erection like a rock under his jeans, as he kisses my neck. I lean my head back as I draw in a deep breath.
His lips move down my shoulder and over my chest until he reaches the valley between my breasts. He looks up at me as he licks my skin. I hold my breath as he kisses his way down my belly. Finally, his head is between my legs and his mouth is on me, hot and firm, as he takes my clit into his mouth and gently sucks.
“Oh, God,” I cry as my fingers grasp the comforter.
He pulls back and gives me a soft lick before he inserts two fingers inside me. His fingers beckon me, coaxing me further down the path of ecstasy. Then his tongue is on me again. His tongue swirls as his fingers massage me from the inside. He alternates between slow and fast, light and firm, as he lovingly pushes me over the edge.
I snatch the pillow out from underneath my head and cover my face because I know I’m about to scream as if I’m being murdered. Suddenly, he stops and pulls his fingers out of me.
I lift the pillow from my face as he kisses my belly. “What? What’s wrong?”
He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a condom. “I changed my mind. I want you to come with me inside you.”
He carefully shrugs out of his jeans and boxers and I watch in amazement as he slides the condom on. His body is amazing. Even after four weeks in a cast, the ripple of his muscles, the way they flex as he moves, is mesmerizing.
He eases himself into position between my legs and takes my left hand in his right hand. He laces his fingers through mine, as if we’re about to start dancing, and looks into my eyes.
“I’ve been writing a song for you, but it’s not finished yet.”
I smile the kind of smile that penetrates down to my heart and through my bones. He smiles as he kisses the back of my hand.
“But I want to sing to you. Do you mind?”
“Of course not.”
I can tell right away when he starts to sing that it’s not one of his songs. He sings low at first, almost a whisper, then a little louder until I can hear some of the lyrics and I recognize the song: “Bloom” by The Paper Kites. His eyes and voice are full of such tenderness. I can feel each word, each syllable, wrapped in love as he delivers them to me, fills me with them.
When he’s finished, he kisses my forehead. “I love you.”
He keeps a firm grip on my hand and I hold my breath as he guides himself into me.
“Is that okay?” he asks as he watches my reaction.
“Yes, yes, yes,” I whisper as he grinds into me. “It’s very okay.”
He presses his lips to the inside of my wrist before he drapes my hand over the back of his neck and kisses me slowly. His mouth moves in time with his hips. His breath is hot in my mouth as he speeds up, the friction between us lighting me up.
“Oh, babe,” he breathes. “I missed being inside you.”
He slows down again, stretching me gently as he plunges deeper. I’m already sensitive from the attention he paid to me a few minutes ago. I’m getting so close to a bone-shaking climax, but I can tell he’s only just begun.