Chapter Twenty-three
Rock stars weren’t expected to have control. They were trained by the world to behave as recklessly and wildly as they wanted to. Ford wasn’t the worst of the bunch, but he’d never been an angel, either.
How was he going to get into the shower with Mia without making love to her?
How was he going to put his hands all over her luscious curves and stop there?
And how the hell was he going to listen to the breathless little sounds she made as her arousal spiked higher and higher and not allow himself to take her all the way up to the peak?
But even though he didn’t have one single answer to his desperate questions, he couldn’t have stopped himself from bringing her into the shower for anything.
They were both still partly dressed when he turned on the faucet and warm water sprayed out over them. He loved having her in his arms, but he needed to put her down at least long enough to strip away her bra and panties. Yes, he knew it would be a hell of a lot wiser to keep her at least partially covered, but he was almost certain he’d die if he didn’t get to see her na**d inside of the next thirty seconds.
He bent to kiss her again as he reached around her back for the clasp of her bra. He was fumbling for the elusive pieces of metal when he felt her laugh against him.
“Not there, rock star.” Her eyes were bright with arousal and humor as she reached around for his hands and brought them to the tiny clasp at the center front. “Here.”
He could feel the tumbling beat of her heart against his hand as she held him there, and he repeated, “Here,” but he wasn’t talking about her bra. And by the way her eyes darkened and her smile fell away, he knew she felt it, too. A connection that neither of them had ever had—or would ever have—with anyone else.
He inhaled once, then twice, to try to get his head on straight. But it was no use, because the moment that he flicked open the clasp and Mia’s incredible br**sts fell into his waiting hands was one he knew he’d never recover from.
He couldn’t speak, couldn’t think, couldn’t do anything but stare in wonder at her gorgeous pale skin, her ni**les a dusky rose that made his mouth water. Palming both of her breasts, he slowly stroked both thumbs over their taut peaks. His hands were shaking, but she was trembling, too, as she stared down with what looked like wonder at his large, tanned hands on her.
“Again.” Her breath was ragged, the word barely understandable as it fell from her lips. “I need y—”
But he was already giving her more with his mouth, covering one perfect nipple with his lips, laving it first with his tongue, and then using his teeth for a heady moment before licking the small bite all better. She gripped his wet hair with both hands and held him to her as she arched deeper into his mouth. He laved every inch of her breast with his tongue before he moved to take her other breast into his mouth.
They’d done this five years ago, and yet as he lifted his head to kiss her, he was amazed to realize that those memories he’d never shaken free of were suddenly receding as they discovered each other all over again.
He was wearing his jeans still, but she’d shimmied fully out of her panties, and as they kissed, the urge to back her up into the tiles and spread her thighs wide, to step between them, and press his denim-covered erection against her sex—was unstoppable.
On a moan of deep pleasure, she rocked into him with her hips, once, twice, and as her body was beginning to tremble and tighten around his, the very last thing he expected her to do was tear her mouth from his.
“Just kissing you won’t be enough tonight,” she told him as the water streamed over her hair, then down over her curves. Her needy body arched and curved into his even as she said, “Not even close to enough, but—”
“But I made you a promise, Mia.” He’d seen her with her family, with her employees. He knew that a promise was as good as gold to her, and he needed her to know that it was the same for him. “And I need to keep it, even if every second of not having all of you is ripping me apart.”
She reached out and placed her hands on either side of his face. “I’ve never wanted anyone or anything the way I want you, but it wouldn’t be fair to either of us if I made you break your promise to me.” She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before saying, “Put me down and hand me the shampoo so I can wash your hair.”
Lord, it was nearly impossible to step away from her, to know that she’d been less than a heartbeat away from coming twice tonight, and then not do whatever he could to take the ache away.
When he did finally move away from her, she looked down at him in surprise. “You still have your pants on.”
“It’s better that way,” he told her.
“No, it isn’t. If I can’t touch you tonight, then I’m definitely going to look.”
She reached for the button of his jeans, but just the slightest brush of her fingers over his abdomen made it clear just what a bad idea that was.
He put his hands over hers. “I need to do it myself.”
He could see how reluctant she was to drop her hands, but she finally nodded. “Okay, but be quick about it.”
He grinned at her sensual order, knowing that only with Mia had desire and joy ever come together this way. Wet denim was a bitch to get off at the best of times, but with the woman he loved na**d and desperately aroused just inches from him, Ford kept getting distracted from his purpose by the way the drops of water rolled down over her breasts, to slide over her ni**les to her stomach, before disappearing between her legs.
“The way you’re looking at me...” She put her hands on his jaw and lifted his gaze back to her eyes. “Hurry, please, or I’m going to have to take matters into my own hands so that I can look at you that way, too.”
Just those words from her lips had his erection growing even harder behind the zipper he’d only pulled halfway down. Moving fast now, he undid his boots and kicked them off, then shoved down his jeans and boxers, leaving them in a heap on the tiled shower floor.
“Oh, Ford.” There was awed lust in Mia’s voice, and it was a long time before she lifted her gaze back to his. “Have you grown bigger in the past five years?”
“Yes,” he teased her, his laughter reverberating from the tiled walls as he bent down to kiss her. “Especially after five days of endless foreplay.”
“Haven’t you taken care of yourself?”
“No.” He kissed her again. “A hundred times I thought about it, a hundred times I was halfway there...and a hundred times I knew it wouldn’t help. Because even if I got myself off, it wouldn’t be your hands on me. It wouldn’t be your mouth on me. And it wouldn’t be you hot and wet around me.”
“Stop.” She pressed her face against his chest. “Please stop saying things like that to me. Especially now that you’re na**d.”
He knew she was right, that he wasn’t helping either of them hold to the promise, but first he needed to know, “Have you touched yourself?”
Her frame shuddered against him as she admitted, “Yes.”
“Good.” He tilted her face up to his and kissed her to let her know he meant it. “When was the last time?”
Her pupils had dilated so much by now that they had nearly pushed all the blue from her eyes. “This morning.”
Hell, she might as well have dropped to her knees and put her hands and mouth on him by this point, he was that close to the edge. “Before or after I came by your office?”
He’d never seen her skin flush so deeply as it did when she said, “Both.”
Oh Lord, he could all too easily picture her with her hand between her legs twice today with that look of sweet ecstasy on her beautiful face as she cl**axed. “I need to know one more thing.” He paused, knowing he shouldn’t even be going there, but unable to help himself. “What were you thinking about as you made yourself come?”
When she looked up at him he already knew the answer, even before she said, “You. It’s always been you.”
He crushed her mouth beneath his, gripping her hair tightly in his hands so that he could keep her exactly where he wanted her.
Exactly where he needed her.
“I love the way you kiss me.” Her voice was husky with desire and pleasure. “Like you’ll never get enough.”
“I never will.”
Her eyes, already clouded with passion, went soft with emotion. “Come and sit down here,” she said as she gently tugged him down onto the tiled ledge. She moved between his legs and squirted some shampoo from the wall dispenser into her hands. “Close your eyes and tilt your head up a little bit.”
With his eyes closed, he was even more aware of her scent, the light rose of her perfume mixed with female arousal. He couldn’t keep his hands to himself, had to reach out to circle her h*ps with his hands, and he heard her suck in a breath at the contact just as she began to massage the shampoo into his hair.
No one had ever touched him like this before. Yes, any time her hands were on him their sensual connection couldn’t be denied, but the feel of her fingers lightly moving along his scalp and her palms pressing against his cheeks and neck, was incredibly comforting. Even as a young child he couldn’t remember anyone being this gentle with him, this caring.
“Tilt your chin up higher,” she said softly, and then she was washing him clean with handfuls of the warm water.
And as she poured one handful of water after another over him, Ford couldn’t help but feel that it wasn’t just his hair she was washing clean...but that she was washing away his mistakes one at a time, too.
“There,” she said as she ran her hands over his skull, brushing his wet hair back from his face. “Perfect.”
He didn’t want to open his eyes yet, wanted nothing more than to pull her closer and lay his head against her chest and hear her heart beat. And when he did, her arms came around his shoulders so that she was holding him.
Ford didn’t know how long they stayed like that, but it was long enough that the water started to cool.
“Looks like shower time is over.” He could hear the same regret in her voice that he felt. “Fortunately, your shampoo was sudsy enough to get both of us plenty clean all over.”
“That’s what I missed while my eyes were closed?” Ongoing—and ever increasing—need had his hands instinctively tightening on her hips. “Soap bubbles running over your na**d body?”
“Just a few hundred or so,” she teased, but before he could grab a bar of soap to create a few hundred more, she gave a little yelp and jumped away from the stream of water. “It’s freezing!” By the time she turned off the faucet, he had already opened the door to grab a thick towel.
It was his turn now to give her the comfort of wrapping the plush cotton around her and rubbing his hands over her curves to dry her off.
She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch. “Mmm, that feels good.”
Did it ever.
Now that he had her wrapped up in the towel and fighting his reaction to her na**dness wasn’t taking every ounce of his concentration, he could see the dark smudges beneath her eyes. She was tired, and he knew he was the reason. Not just because of her long drive to Eugene today, but because he doubted she was getting much more sleep than he was. At least, she was relieving a little bit of the pressure by touching herself—
No, that was exactly the wrong road to go down. Later, when she wasn’t right here tempting him, he’d let himself fantasize about how she might have touched herself. Although hopefully soon she’d trust him enough with her heart that he wouldn’t have to fantasize...because he’d be right there with her in the bed.
He picked her up, grabbing a towel for himself as he headed from the shower into his private bedroom at the back of the bus. Without opening her eyes, she reached out to wrap her arms around his neck and nuzzle his still-wet skin.
“Time for bed.”
Her heavy eyelids fluttered open. “Not yet.”
Of course, he also wanted to spend more time talking, teasing, laughing with her, but he was trying to think of what was best for her as he said, “You must be tired after your long day and drive.”
“No,” she swore as he gently laid her down on the bed, “I’m not the least bit tired.” He’d barely wrapped up in a towel and come behind her to draw her against him, her back to his front, when she said, “I want to hear all about your show.”
“It was good.” He stroked her wet hair as it lay spread across his pillow. Her skin smelled like his shampoo, but her hair still held her signature rose scent. “I played the new song I wrote for you.”
She ran her hand down the arm draped across her waist until she could cover his hand with hers. She lifted it to tuck it between her br**sts as she said, “They must have loved it.”
Her head fit perfectly beneath his chin, and he barely stifled a groan as she wiggled her bottom more tightly against his hips. “They did.”
“How does it feel to be up there in front of so many people who all love what you do so much?”
“Lucky.” She shifted slightly to look at him over her shoulder as he thought about how to explain it better. “There are millions of kids with guitars. A million more who are trying to get away from their current lives into a better one. I think about that every time I get up on stage, how everyone in the audience is willing to part with time and money they don’t have any extra of to spend a night with me. I’d be nothing without them.”
“Yes, you would.” She gripped his hand tighter against her heart. “Even if you’d never hit it big, even if your songs had never been on the radio, even if you were playing dive bars instead of stadiums, you’d still be amazing, Ford.” She spread his hand flat against her heart so that he could feel it beating against his palm. “Amazing inside and out.”
If he’d thought it was difficult not to make love to her, he suddenly found it was a thousand times more difficult not to scare her off by telling her exactly how much he loved her...and to keep from begging her to love him back just as much.
“How many houses did you sell today?”
He couldn’t see her smile, but he swore he could feel it as she said, “Just one, before I decided to hightail it to Oregon. It was for a family that is going to be really happy with the neighborhood and the nearby beach. Even better, we were able to close the deal without breaking the bank. I hate to see people overextended.”
He would have expected most Realtors to celebrate the higher priced sales, because those sales meant an automatic rise in their salary. Mia had gone from being fairly new in the business to having her own thriving brokerage since they’d first met. But he could easily guess that the reason she had been able to build it so quickly was because she matched people up with the properties that were right for them, regardless of how much they cost or how small her percentage might end up amounting to.
“Having a home is important.” It was something he’d only just learned.
And yet, as she slipped into sleep in his arms, even though they were in his tour bus rather than his new house, just holding her made him feel like he was finally home.