And, holy f**king shit, he just blurted, “Will you marry me?”
Surprised didn’t even explain what jolted through my system. More like utter and complete astonishment. I physically jerked, the SUV also swerving with my motion, and Ezra’s hand blurred, reaching over to grab the wheel and right our direction before I plowed into a van. “Did you…,” I blubbered, gripping the wheel tight to keep it straight on the road, my eyes darting back and forth between him and the street, “Did…did you…I…” I swallowed hard, trying to breathe normally, my heartbeat racing like mad when he only stared at me, not taking his words back. “Did…did you just ask me to marry you?”
He held his hands up. “Just hold on and hear me out before you answer.” He was scrutinizing me like someone might watch a cagey animal. “First, I’m not asking because my mother was killed yesterday, and I’m looking at life like it’s too short to waste, although, that reasoning is true, just not because I lost my mother. I had planned to ask you that night after we left the ice-cream parlor. Remember I had told you I wanted you in a good mood to ask you something?”
I blinked, gulping in air, swallowing hard as my thoughts swam in a million different directions, but I did remember him saying that right before Antonio had his vision, so I bobbed my head, an odd sound making its way out of my throat.
Confusion. Fear. Shock. Surprise.
All of these emotions were slamming at me, and not to mention I also felt…thrilled.
Fuck, I was a mess.
He gestured around us. “Well, when we figured out we were going to stay in Vegas, where there’s a chapel on every damn corner, it reminded me of some friends I used to know, and I didn’t think there would be another opportunity like this for us, with the war approaching.”
I blinked, and amazingly, yet another new emotion swamped me. Upset. I was damn upset. “You want to marry me right now because it’s convenient?”
He stilled, and then shook his head hard. “Shit, that didn’t come out right.” He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “Can you find a place to park?”
My lips pinched as I was still feeling hurt, but I did find a restaurant to park in. I took my seatbelt off and turned to face him. His lips were lifted slightly as he stared at me, even though his eyes held that vulnerable cast I had seen in the parlor before everything went to hell. He leaned over and pushed my glasses up on my nose when they slipped. “I don’t want to marry you because we’re in a convenient location.” He gestured to a cute white chapel I hadn’t even noticed across the street. “If you say yes, we won’t be married in a Com chapel. It’ll be done secretly and legally by Mysticals who are friends of mine, per our traditions. Plus, their expedients will be faster.”
Oh…duh. Again, Com-thinking in action.
He took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes. “And, in all honesty, this isn’t a convenient time for me. I did just lose my mother, and I would much rather be feeling what I felt before her death than what I am right now.” He slipped the glasses back on and stared me in the eyes. “I love you. You are who I want to spend the rest of my life with. I was scared at first, but once I got over that hump, I could see what a f**king idiot I was not to push for us to be a couple before. I’m seeing clearly now. You are who I want, so now I’m going to push as I should have before.”
Slowly, he lifted my trembling hand from my leg, holding it tightly. “I want to fall asleep next to you every night even when you’re cranky. I want to wake up next to you every morning even when I’m grumpy. I love the fact that when you snore it sounds a little like your wolf. I love that your mind is just as scheming as mine. I love the tiny smile you show only me after we’ve made love. I love the compassion you show to your subjects when other Rulers wouldn’t, but at the same time your intelligence and determination when you know you can’t. I love how loyal you are to those you love. And when it’s time to have children, you’re the one I want to have them with.”
His nostrils flared, his grip tightening on my hand. “There’s so much more I could go on about, but the fact is, I want to marry you. I want to be yours completely and forever and I want you to be mine completely and forever.” He bit his lip, something I had never seen him do, his eyes dancing back and forth between mine. “Please say you’ll marry me?”
My heart had just about melted when he began talking so earnestly, his words so humbly honest. I was watching him put himself out there — and he was scared, I could see it in the way the normally unbreakable man’s leg was bouncing up and down nervously, in his slightly sweating palm even if his grip was firm, and in the way his heartbeat was thumping faster than a locomotive. He had put his heart on the line. Tossing it to me and praying I wouldn’t break it. “You need to calm down,” I whispered, tears slipping from my eyes. “It’s killing me seeing you like this.”
He exhaled heavily, the sound explosive. “That wasn’t an answer, sweetheart.”
My eyes widened. Dear Lord. I had thought I had said yes a hundred times already. “Yes.” Fuck yes. He was who I wanted for every goddamn reason he had said about me, and then a billion more. My heart was his. “Baby, I’m yours. You should know this already. You only surprised me with the question.”
I shook my head, tears still tracking down my cheeks in pure happiness. “Well, I was shocked and scared, too, because of who we are. I never even considered marriage for us. I thought we would have to live as we were, without the option, and be content with it, but that was stupid. There’s no reason we can’t marry if you have ways to keep this quiet.” I leaned over, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Ezra, I’m yours. I’ll marry you every damn day for the rest of our lives if that’s what it takes to keep you.”
Tilting his head back, his grin was enormous, his teeth flashing white in the dark, as he cupped my cheeks. “I’m sure once will be enough.” He softly nipped my bottom lip. “You’re mine, sweetheart.”
I nipped his lip back. “And you’re mine.”
After hurriedly finding food and flashlights for the vacant house’s occupants and dropping them off there with a vague excuse of us needing to leave again, Ezra gave me directions he read from a text message. Apparently, during his walk today, he had contacted friends via phone who he had known had lived here at one point, after he had run by their old living quarters downtown and seen they were no longer there.