Jess murmured and stroked Tucker’s cheek. His eyes opened.
“Whoa. He’s lookin’ at me.”
“He’s actually awake more than I thought he’d be.”
“Heya, buddy. Welcome to the family.” Tell kissed Jessie’s forehead. “Ya done good, Mama. He’s perfect. And so little.”
She snorted. “He didn’t feel little when I was tryin’ to push him out.”
Tell chuckled.
“Do you wanna hold him?”
“In a bit. He looks content. I ain’t gonna mess with him.”
Jessie frowned.
“Has Dalton been by yet?”
“He’s on his way. Now that Tell’s here to keep you company, I’m gonna fill out that paperwork.” Brandt softly closed the door behind him.
Tell’s gaze connected with Jessie’s. “Is everything all right?”
“No. Brandt… He…” She shook her head. “This is gonna sound stupid, but I don’t think he likes Tucker.”
“Why would you say that?”
“Brandt was great during the delivery. He stayed right beside me and he didn’t blink when I sort of…took a swing at him.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. It didn’t faze him. He just kept me focused on getting through the next contraction. After I delivered Tucker and it was just the three of us alone in the room, Brandt was so quiet. When I finally made him hold his son, he just looked at Tucker like I’d handed him a rabid raccoon.” Jessie started to cry.
Tell was going to slap his stupid f**king brother right upside the head when he got him alone.
“What if he didn’t really want this baby? What if Brandt just said he did to make me happy and now he regrets it—”
“Hey.” Tell wrapped his hands around Jessie’s face, wiping away her tears. “I promise you, I will find out what is wrong with him. But get it outta your head, right now, Jess, that he doesn’t love this kid.”
Silence.
Then Tucker squirmed and grunted and made the funniest face that both Tell and Jessie laughed.
Three knocks and the door swung open.
Keely McKay Donohue sauntered in, holding a shiny blue bag covered in rocking horses. “Thank God that baby is finally here.” She hugged Tell and then hip-checked him, completely horning in on his spot.
He knew Keely would stick around awhile and he considered tracking down his shit-for-brains older brother. But he opted to stay in case Keely needed encouragement to leave because Jess was too nice to point her toward the door.
“Do you wanna hold him?” Jessie asked Keely.
“Yep. Lemme pull a chair over first.” She scooped Tucker up like a pro. “He’s hefty. Colt and India’s McKenna weighed in at seven pounds. That one pound makes a big difference.”
“Tell me about it.”
Keely kissed Tucker’s forehead. “God. I love the way babies smell. And they’re so warm and cuddly.”
“After that remark, you know I’m gonna ask when you and Jack are going to start a family,” Jessie said.
“I know.” Keely fussed with the blanket. “Can I ask you something? On a scale of one to ten, how bad did it hurt to have these eight pounds squeezed out of your va-jay-jay?”
Jessie paused. “A nine.”
Tell did not want to hear this conversation but now he was trapped.
“Crap. That’s what I thought. See, AJ spews this ‘it’s a beautiful thing’ when she talks about giving birth, even when I saw her screaming at Cord when she was in labor with Beau.”
“Yikes.”
“And that was her second baby.”
“Well, it hurts like nothing I’ve ever felt. I mean, I wanted to punch and scratch and scream at Brandt because I had to go through all of this and he didn’t. Yet the baby would still be half his. How is that fair? At the very least he should have to suffer somehow, right? I mean, months of being sick, being hormonal, being fat, being so desperately horny and then wanting to chop off Brandt’s hand or his dick if either so much as touched me again.”
Tell’s legs automatically snapped together.
“And now after the blessed event, not only is there no sex for six weeks, I’ve been warned that my ni**les might crack and bleed while I’m breastfeeding. Not to mention milk leaks everywhere. And I have this extra pooch of skin on my gut that I’ll probably never get rid of. I’m pretty sure my hips or my ass won’t ever be the same pre-baby size.”
Maybe they wouldn’t notice if he dropped to the floor and crawled out. Knowing women talked about shit like this and hearing it? Two. Different. Things.
“See?” Keely pointed out. “Pregnancy sounds like a raw deal for women, doesn’t it?”
Jessie’s face softened. “But look at him, Keely. He’s so perfect. He’s part me and part Brandt. I just stare at his sweet little face and wonder if he’ll have my personality or his father’s, or maybe his own. I wonder who he will look like.”
“Hate to break it to you, but this boy already looks like a McKay. He’s beautiful.” Keely sniffled.
Holy f**k. His cowgirl-tough cousin was…crying?
Jessie’s voice dropped to a soothing timbre Tell hadn’t heard from her. “What’s this really about, Keels? Being scared of labor isn’t really what’s holding you back from having a baby. Is Jack pressuring you?”
Keely wiped beneath her eyes. “A little. I love Jack like crazy. I love our life together. I never thought I’d be this happy. What if having a baby screws that up? What if everything in our life becomes about being parents? What if I lose myself in motherhood? We both know we won’t stop at one kid. Plus, I don’t think I’m cut out to be a full-time, stay-at-home mom. And I’m afraid that’s what Jack wants, because that’s what we both had growing up.”
“Have you talked to Jack about any of this?”
“No. He’s my best friend—hell, he’s my everything—but I don’t think he’ll understand. I can’t talk to AJ because she’s glowing with pregnancy. My mom had five kids by the time she was my age. My single friends remind me I’m only thirty and there’s no rush to motherhood. My sisters-in-law and my cousins’ wives nag me to get on the ball so mine and Jack’s kids will be raised around cousins like I was. I just feel that no one understands my fears, even when they sound stupid when I say them out loud.”