Cowgirls Don't Cry (Rough Riders 10) - Page 50/87

Brandt laughed. Ben always got straight to the point, which was probably why he’d shown up here.

He took a long pull off his beer. “To be honest, I ain’t exactly sure why I’m here. I just got done talkin’ to Samantha, Landon’s mom, and she left me with a feeling I can’t shake.”

“Like what?”

“Like…maybe she’s gotten used to bein’ away from Landon and would like to continue that when they let her out of jail.”

Ben whistled. “No shit?”

“That’s the thing. Samantha didn’t come right out and say it, I don’t even know if she was hinting around or if I somehow misread it. And it ain’t like I can talk to anybody in my family about it.”

“What about Jessie?”

“Her stipulation was no information on Samantha for the duration of this temporary situation. So if it turns out to be a longer temporary situation than four months, and if Samantha decides she’d rather let us raise Landon…” He sighed. “Us, meaning me raising Landon with some help from Dalton, Tell and my mom.” When Ben lifted a questioning brow, Brandt shook his head. “No f**kin’ way will I let Landon live with my father.”

“And how does Aunt Joan feel about that?”

“We’re on the same page, since she’s sneaking outta the house one day a week to watch Landon as it is.”

“What?”

“She’s takin’ care of him at her house on Tuesdays, but on Thursdays she tells dad she’s volunteering for some church thing when she’s really at my place.”

“Why the lie?”

“Because my dad…” He took a drink of beer. “Mom told me she had to go out for an hour and when she got back, Landon was screaming bloody murder in his crib to the point he threw up all over himself.

Seems my dad just sat on his ass in the living room and ignored him. Dad’s excuse? The kid needed to learn early on that he wasn’t gonna get his way by screamin’ his fool head off.” His father’s justification was seriously scary shit. “Jesus. Landon is barely more than a baby. And my dad’s attitude is Landon is acting manipulative? At seventeen months?”

Ben pointed with his beer bottle. “How would it be bad if you ended up bein’ Landon’s guardian? I mean, it’s obvious you care about the kid.”

He didn’t answer. Didn’t know how to without coming across as a pansy ass whiner.

Ben whistled again. “This has to do with Jessie, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah. I’d have to choose, Ben. And how the f**k do I do that? Choose between the only living part of Luke I’ll ever have or the only woman I’ve ever…” He scowled. Way to be a pansy-ass.

“I ain’t gonna point out the obvious end to that statement, but maybe you’d better tell me what’s goin’

on with you and Jessie? And how long has it been goin’ on?”

“Since the moment I saw her.” Brandt drained his beer. Ben uncapped a fresh one and set it in front of him. “Thanks.”

“No problem. Keep talking.”

“You sure you wanna hear this? It’s old news.”

“Maybe in your family it is, but I’ve never heard it.”

“Luke and I were at the Devil’s Tower Rodeo and Jessie was there. I noticed her first, something about her just…hit me. Anyway, like a total dumbass, I pointed her out to Luke. And Luke, bein’ the handsome f**kin’ cowboy charmer he was, got to her first, which meant I didn’t stand a chance. So over the next month I had to listen to every goddamned detail of how Luke seduced her. Don’t get me wrong, Luke liked her, probably because she was so different from the type of women he usually dated.”

“Meaning what?”

“She wasn’t trashy or wild. I think Luke saw a lot of our mom in Jessie. I also think he would’ve gotten tired of her, but he knocked her up. They got married, she lost the baby, and then my brother started stepping out on her.”

“Fuck that. I’m sorry Brandt, but that’s bullshit. If he didn’t wanna be married to her, he should’ve asked for a divorce.”

“That’s what I told him. And Tell told him. And Dalton told him. Hell, my dad kept tellin’ Luke to divorce Jessie, too, but Luke took extreme joy in doin’ the exact opposite of what Dad wanted, as often as possible. Jessie was caught in the middle. So was I.

“Cut to me stepping in and tryin’ to fill Luke’s shoes after he died. So about a year later, I spilled my guts to her—yes, I was sober—and goddamn if she didn’t give me the ‘friend’ speech. I licked my wounds and tried like hell to erase her from my memory by becoming the wild McKay I’d never been.”

“But it didn’t work?”

“Not even f**kin’ close. After she agreed to help me take care of Landon, things have changed between us. In a good way. Now I’ve got her in my life and in my bed and I don’t want it to be a temporary fling. But it won’t happen if I become Landon’s permanent guardian. So yeah, I’m f**ked.” Brandt swallowed a drink of beer. “Ain’t ya glad you asked?”

Ben laughed. “As the McKay World Turns, huh?”

“Yeah. I’m just glad all this shit isn’t common knowledge with our McKay relatives, although they can probably put the pieces together now that Luke’s illegitimate love kid has surfaced.”

“You might be freakin’ out over nothin’, Brandt. From what I understand, Samantha changing her mind is the worst case scenario.”

“True. But in my experience? It’s always the worst case scenario that plays out.”

Ben returned with another beer for himself.

“So…got any advice?”

“Nope.” He swigged his beer and then grinned. “That’s not exactly true. I’m more of an observation type guy, so I’ll tell you how I see it. You’re asking yourself what you’d have to sacrifice to keep her. But why wouldn’t she have to sacrifice something in order to be with you? Unless she owns up to a few things, seems you’re back to being a in one-sided situation and she still has all the power.”

Going round and round with this was pointless. Brandt switched gears. “What the f**k happened to Chase in Dallas?”

“You saw him getting tossed into the air and that bull dancin’ the cha-cha on his back?”