Eve sat on the floor, hugging her knees close to her chest. She looked at him with anime-wide eyes. And?
He got drunk. A lot. Bitterness ran black through Shanes voice, and all of a sudden the beer bottle in his hand seemed to get a whole lot of significance for him, beyond just something to occupy his nervous hands. He set it down on the floor and wiped his palms on his blue jeans. He started hooking up with these bikers and stuff. Iwasnt in a real good place; I dont remember some of that. Couple of weeks later we got a visit from these guys in suits. Not vamps, lawyers. They gave us money, lots of it. Insurance. Except we both knew who it was from, and the point was, they were trying to figure out what we knew and remembered. I was too drugged out to know what was going on, and Dad was drunk, so I guess that saved our lives. They decided we were no threat. He wiped his forehead with the heel of his hand and laugheda bitter, broken sound like glass in a blender.
Shane on drugs. Claire saw that Michael had caught it, too. She wondered if he was going to say something, but maybe it wasnt the best time to say, Hey, man, you using now? Or something like that.
He didnt need to ask, as it turned out. Shane answered anyway. But I kicked it, and Dad sobered up, and we planned this out. Thing is, even though we remembered a lot of stuff, the personal stuff, we couldnt remember things about how to find vamps, or the layout of the town, or even who we were looking for. So that was my job. Come back, scout it out, find out where the vamps hide during the day. Report back. It wasnt supposed to take this long, and I wasnt supposed toget tangled up.
With us, Eve supplied softly. Right? He didnt want you to have any friends.
Friends get you killed in Morganville.
No. Eve put a pale hand on his knee. Shane, honey, in Morganville, friends are the only things that keep you alive.
Chapter Seven
Claire couldnt believe how much had poured out of Shaneall that grief and horror and bitterness and anger. Hed always seemed sort of, well, normal, and it was a shock to see all the emotional bloodshedand a shock to hear him talk so much, about things so personal. Shane wasnt a talker.
She collected the dishes and did them alone, comforted by hot water and the fizz of soap on her hands; she cleaned up pots and pans and splashes of red sauce, and thought about Shane finding his mom dead in a bloody bathtub. I wasnt in a real good place, Shane had said. The master of understatement. Claire wasnt so sure that shed ever have been able to smile again, laugh again, function again, if that had happened to her, especially after losing a sister and winning the Drunk-Asshole Lottery with Dad. How did he do it? How did he keep it together, and stay sobrave?
She wanted to cry for him, but she was almost sure that hed have been embarrassed, so she kept the misery inside, and scrubbed dishes clean. He doesnt deserve this. Why dont they all just leave him alone? Why does he have to be the one everybody beats on?
Maybe just because hed shown he could take it, and make himself stronger for it.
The kitchen door swung open, and she jumped, expected Shane, but it was Michael. He walked over to the sink, ran some cold water in his hands, and splashed it over his face and the back of his neck.
Bad night, Claire said.
Tell me about it. He cut a sideways look toward her.
Do you think hes right? About them, you know, killing his mother?
I think Shanes carrying around a load of guilt the size of TrumpTower. And I think it helps him to be angry. Michael shrugged. I dont know. Its possible. But I dont think we can know one way or the other.
That feltsick, somehow. No wonder Shane was so reluctant to talk about it. She tried to imagine living with that kind of uncertainty, those memories, and failed.
She was glad she did.
So, Michael said. Ive got about three hours until morning. We need to make some plans about what were going to do, and what were not going to do.
Claire nodded and set a plate aside to dry.
First thing is, none of you leave the house, Michael said. Got it? No school, no work. You stay indoors. I cant protect you if you go outside.
We cant just hide!
We can for a while, and we will. Look, Shanes dad cant run around out there forever. Its a temporary problem. Someones going to find him. The unspoken subject of what would happen to Shanes dad after he was caught was a whole other issue. As long as we dont do anything directly that ties us to whatever his dad does, were okay. Amelies word is good for that.
Youre putting a lot of trust in
A vampire, yeah, I know. Michael shrugged and leaned a hip against the counter, looking down on her. What choices do we have?
Not too many, I guess. Claire studied him more closely. He looked tired. Michael? Are you okay?
Now he looked surprised. Sure. Shanes the one whos got issues. Not me.
No, Michael was all good. Killed, dismembered, buried, rebornyeah, just another day in the life. Claire sighed. Guys, she said mournfully. Michael, Ill stay home today, but I really do have to go to school, you know. Really. Because her missing school was like a caffeine addict going without a daily jolt.
Your education or your life, Claire. Id rather you be alive and a little bit dumber.
She met his eyes squarely. Well, I wouldnt. Ill stay home today. I dont promise about tomorrow.
He smiled, leaned forward, and put a warm sloppy kiss on her forehead. Thats my girl, he said, and left. She sighed again, this time happily, and found herself grinning. Michael might be Eves new main crush, but he was still available as an oh-my-God-how-cute-is-he thrill.
Claire finished the dishes and went back to the living room. The TV was on, tuned to some forensics show, and Shane was slumped on the couch staring at it. No sign of Eve or Michael. Claire hesitated, thinking longingly about bed and forgetting about all this for a while, but Shane just looked soalone.
She went and settled in next to him. She didnt say anything, and neither did he, and after a while his arm went around her and that was all right.
She fell asleep there, braced against his warm body.
It was nice.
Claire supposed that she should have known Shane might have nightmaresbad onesbut shed never really thought about it. When Shane jerked and rolled off the couch, she thumped flat onto the cushions. The TV was still ona flickering confusion of colorand Claire flailed and scrambled for some grasp of what was going on through the fog of interrupted sleep.
Shane?
He was on his side on the floor, shuddering, curled up into a ball. Claire slid down next to him and put her hands on his broad back. Under the thin T-shirt his skin was clammy, and his muscles were as tense as steel cable. He was making these sounds, agonizing gasps that werent quite sobs but werent quite not, either.
She didnt know what to do. Shed felt helpless a lot in the past few hours, but this was worse, somehow, because Michael and Eve were nowhere to be seen, and she wasnt sure if Shane would have wanted them to see him like this. Or if he wanted her to see him like this. Shane was all about the pride.