Drawing a sharp breath, I said, "No, I don't. He knew Shaun was lying. Calvin isn't stupid. He knew Korbie and I were-arein danger, and he knew Shaun was at least partially responsible. Anyway, Shaun was hardly innocent. How many times did he hold a gun on me and Korbie?We were unarmed.You didn't seem to care then. You're just angry because Shaun was your friend. If their roles had been reversed, Shaun would have shot Calvin
without a moment's thought. You can't honestly tell me Shaun felt any remorse when he shot the game warden. And don't forget about the police officer he shot before you fled to the mountains, or the girl he sent to the hospital. Shaun had no regard for life. I'm not sorry Calvin shot him."
Jude nodded. Not in a way that made me think he agreed with me. It was more that he now understood my frame of mind, and took note of it. "I definitely think we should go to Idlewilde. Assuming Calvin can find Korbie, he'll take her there. Which means getting you to Idlewilde, and reuniting you with your friends, should be our top priority."
I stared at him curiously. For the second time I asked, "Why are you helping me?"
He leaned back against the roots, lacing his fingers behind his head and crossing his ankles, looking for all the world like a carefree lumberjack. "Maybe I'm in this for me. It's in my best interest to explain myself to Calvin. I wouldn't want him to shoot me too,” he suggested lightly enough, but-perhaps I imagined it-with a touch of dark severity.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Jude and I sat on ground mats and a sleeping bag under the uprooted tree, huddled around the fire, soaking up every last ripple of heat. Jude asked a few more questions about Calvin, which made me think he was scared of him, but mostly we kept the conversation light.
As Jude talked, I found myself wondering about him. Why he'd left California. How he'd fallen into an uneasy friendship-or maybe "partnership” was the better word-with Shaun. I wanted to question him, but I was afraid he'd see it as a trick to get him to reveal details that I could use later to help the police identify him. Which, in part,
was my intent. I had a moral obligation to aid the police in capturing Jude. But on a more personal level, I was growing increasingly curious about him. For reasons I didn't want to dissect.
I was beginning to doze off to the low, pleasant timbre of Jude's voice, when without warning he said, "Once we get to Idlewilde, Calvin is going to want to turn me over to the authorities. It was Shaun's idea to abduct you, but I went along with it." He frowned. "He might even try to use physical force to detain me."
Suddenly fearful that Jude would change his mind about helping me to get to Idlewilde, I quickly said, "We can tell Calvin that you turned on Shaun and helped me escape."
"Your story won't match Korbie's."
"We'll tell Calvin you turned on Shaun after you abducted me. That you were scared to stand up to Shaun at first, because he was the ringleader and had a gun, but when you saw how horribly he treated me, you decided to take matters into your own hands."
Jude shook his head, unconvinced. "That doesn't erase the fact that I took you in the first place. Calvin doesn't strike me as the forgiving type-for him, there's no such thing as a mistake. He'll want retribution."
No such thing as a mistake? He sounds like Calvin's dad, I thought.
"I'll talk to him,” I said. "He'll listen to me."
"Really,” he said in an incongruously level tone. "I didn't get the feeling Calvin listens to anyone. He definitely didn't care what Shaun had to say."
The conversation had suddenly gotten out of my hands. I had to convince Jude that Calvin wouldn't harm him, but the truth was, I didn't know how Calvin would react when we arrived at Idlewilde. Especially since he'd already killed Shaun. I didn't want to believe he was capable of shooting Jude in cold blood too, but I couldn't rule it out.
"Even in the unlikely event that you get Calvin to back down,” he went on, what about the police?" You'll have to report what happened. Everything will come out, including my role in your abduction."
"No."I shook my head adamantly. "I won't tell them about you.”
”Not on purpose, maybe. But you're going to have to tell them about me, Britt. They're going to ask a litany of questions, and the truth will come out. You got dragged into this mess by accident. You don't have anything to hide. You have no reason to cover for
me, and we both know it."
"That's not true. Listen, it was Shaun's idea to take us hostage. If you promise to help me, I'll lie for you. I'll-do anything you want!" I finished desperately.
He turned to face me, his brown eyes locking me in a penetrating gaze. "Do you think I'm only helping you because I want something in return?"
I didn't know why he was helping me. But it only made sense that he expected some kind of payment. Up until now, I'd avoided any serious speculation about what I might have to do here in the mountains to survive, but I would make it out. I wasn't going to die up here. I'd do what I had to. If I had to send my mind to another place while I did, so be it.
Jude moved toward me suddenly, and I drew back with a frightened gasp. Too late, I realized he'd only been shifting his weight.
He gave a snort of disgust. "Think I'd hit you? Among other things? Your brain is going wild trying to imagine the sordid requests I might make of you in exchange for helping you to Idlewilde-don't bother denying it, your revulsion is written on your face. Well, you can stop panicking. I won't force myself on you. And I'll try to look past your thinking I would. I took you hostage because I didn't see another option. I'm sorry you got dragged into this mess, but I'll remind you that I did try to stop it from happening. And while we're on the subject of my character, let me ease your conscience. I've never been with any woman who wasn't willing,” he finished with thinly veiled resentment.
"I don't know you,” I stammered, shaken not only by his perceptiveness but by the topic of our conversation. I didn't want to talk about sex with Jude. I only wanted to make it out of here alive. "So forgive me for doubting your motives."
Jude had a scathing comment ready to fly-I saw it in his broiling, angry eyes-but at the last moment the tension went out of his face and he settled into a gloomy silence.
I bowed my head between my knees. I wished my socks would hurry up and dry. I couldn't fully stretch out my legs in our tiny fortress without touching Jude. He sat so close, I could hear him breathing, every exhalation sounding agitated.
"Why did you break up with your ex?" Jude asked unexpectedly. He wouldn't look at me, but I could tell he was doing his best to sound friendly. Maybe not friendly. Maybe just not offended. Like me, he probably realized we were stuck here together and it was in our best interest to keep things as civil as possible. "You said his name a few times while you were asleep."