‘Just like old times,’ said Shurq. ‘Barring the awkward pauses, the absurd opulence, and the weight of an entire kingdom pressing down upon us. Remind me to decline the next invitation.’
‘Longing for a swaying deck under your feet?’ Tehol asked. ‘Oh, how I miss the sea-’
‘How can you miss what you’ve never experienced?’
‘Well, good point. I should have been more precise. I miss the false memory of missing a life on the sea. It was, at the risk of being coarse, my gesture of empathy.’
‘I don’t really think the captain’s longings should be the subject of conversation, husband,’ Queen Janath said, mostly under her breath.
Shurq heard her none the less. ‘Highness, this night has made it grossly obvious that you hold to an unreasonable prejudice against the dead. If I was still alive I’d be offended.’
‘No you wouldn’t.’
‘In a gesture of empathy, indeed I would!’
‘Well, I do apologize,’ said the Queen. ‘I just find your, uh, excessively overt invitations to be somewhat off-putting-’
‘My excessively overt what ? It’s called make-up! And clothes!’
‘More like dressing the feast,’ murmured Janath.
Tehol and Bugg shared a wince.
Shurq Elalle smirked. ‘Jealousy does not become a queen-’
‘Jealousy? Are you mad?’
The volume of the exchange was escalating. ‘Yes, jealousy! I’m not getting any older and that fact alone-’
‘Not any older, true enough, just more and more… putrid.’
‘No less putrid than your unseemly bigotry! And all I need do by way of remedy is a bag full of fresh herbs!’
‘That’s what you think.’
‘Not a single man’s ever complained. I bet you can’t say the same.’
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
Shurq Elalle then chose the most vicious reply of all. She said nothing. And took another delicate mouthful of wine.
Janath stared, and then turned on her husband.
Who flinched.
In a tight, low voice, Janath asked, ‘Dear husband, do I fail in pleasing you?’
‘Of course not!’