Entering the bachelor wing and my bedroom—our bedroom—I shrugged out of my jacket and draped it over an ancient sideboard.
Nila drifted to the middle of the carpet, staring blankly at the bed.
My heart clenched. All I wanted to do was take away the weight of decision and grant her peace. Moving behind her, I unzipped her jacket and slid it off her arms.
The scents of fire and fresh air licked around her.
“Do you want a shower?” I asked softly, massaging her shoulders.
She jumped, startled by my voice after only the crackle of fire as conversation. Turning to lock herself in my embrace, she shook her head. “I don’t need a shower.” Her voice echoed with need for something else. I didn’t need to ask what she needed—I already knew.
I knew far more than I should.
However, I was respectful of granting some semblance of boundaries.
Nila had a lot to sort out internally. I wouldn’t make it worse knowing she couldn’t pretend she was okay when I knew completely she was not.
So even though I didn’t need to, I asked anyway, “What do you need…”
Her head tilted up, her black eyes flashing with ebony fire. “You.” She stood on tiptoes, pressing her lips to mine. “I need you.”
My cock thickened; my heart raced.
I needed her, too. So fucking much. More now than ever as she was currently lost to me. She didn’t know how to take her position within this life. She didn’t know how to admit to herself that if she hadn’t been chosen over Jacqueline, she would never have met me. Never have fallen for me. And I would never have fallen for her.
I groaned as the true worry of her thoughts rose.
I didn’t want to pry, but I couldn’t let her think such incorrect things.
“I wouldn’t have loved her, Needle.”
She gasped, her kiss stalling.
I parted her lips with my tongue, feeding her the truth. “Only you. I don’t care she was supposed to be my inheritance. I don’t care you took her place. In fact, I’m so fucking glad.”
Her breath hitched as I kissed her harder, crushing her to me. “I’m so happy it was you because you cured me, fixed me. I love you, Nila. Not her. Not anyone else. You.”
Her arms, both good and broken, slung around my neck, pulling me hard against her mouth. I let her guide me to bed. I let her control the kiss. I let her grab my shirt and pull me down upon her. And I let her control whatever she needed.
I’d give her anything she ever wanted.
I’d spend the rest of my life ensuring she never had to doubt my feelings for her.
She was it for me.
It didn’t matter if lies brought us together.
Fate had decided we were matched.
And we’d fulfilled that prophecy by falling head over fucking heels.
I WOKE UP the same way I’d fallen asleep.
By Jethro making love to me.
We’d remained wrapped in each other’s arms for a few vacant hours of sleep. I didn’t dream. I didn’t fret. I just slept and recharged after such a long emotional day.
Jethro roused me with kisses and touches, bringing me to a soft release before carrying me into the shower to wash.
After the bonfire, the sun had already risen on a new day.
The day.
The day we said goodbye to Kestrel.
I feared I’d be tired as Jethro and I dressed quickly, slipping into jeans and jackets and boots. I feared I’d be muddled with sleep deprivation as we ate a quick lunch in the kitchen and strode over the gardens to the stables.
But I didn’t need to fear.
The time with Jethro had recharged me better than sleep.
During the bonfire, I couldn’t think about my mother without wanting to howl at the moon and demand her explanation. I wanted to kick and punch my father for holding such a terrible secret my entire life. And I wanted to hold Vaughn because it wasn’t just me this news affected.
We’d been raised as each other’s everything. Twins. Best friends. Confidants.
To find out we were actually only two-thirds of a complete sibling set—it hurt.
Jacqueline.
Tex said he would continue to track down the adoptive family. He hadn’t been strong enough until now to find the truth.
Then again, maybe strength kept him away.
I was third born.
I should never have had to pay the debt.
But I had, and I’d ended it.
Jacqueline owed her life to my parents for saving her. But her future children owed me their safety.
Jethro took my gloved hand as we stepped from the sun’s glare into the musky world of the stables. “Are you ready?”
Cobblestones and hay welcomed along with memories of Jethro tenderly cutting my hair, putting me back together again with the same implement that’d destroyed me. Stable hands bustled about, gathering saddles and bridles, tending to the horses.
My heart leapt as I noticed Moth.
Kes’s horse.
My horse.
The bridge between us I’d always cherish.
Squeezing his fingers, I nodded.
His lips smiled, but his eyes fought tears.
Today would be hard for him. But I would be there. I would always be there.
He sucked in a deep breath. “Okay, then.”
Together, we prepared to say goodbye to Kestrel Hawk.
“YOU SURE YOU want to do this?” I eyed Jasmine as Vaughn manhandled our gentlest horse from its box. The grooms had already combed, saddled, and prepared six mounts.
I’d planned this day for the past week.