“You should get to your next class. The bells about to ring.” He said quietly into my ear. His hot breath on my neck made my body melt. I had not even heard him end his call.
“So, I’m not in trouble?” I asked, too nervous to turn around and face him.
“I didn’t say that.” From the tone of his voice, I could tell that he was smiling. I sucked in another ragged breath and nodded my head.
“Yes, Sir” I grabbed my books just as the bell rang and snuck back out into the hall as everyone else filtered out of their classrooms. I could not tell if I was still buzzing from the weed or from my encounter with Mr. Honor. Halfway down the hall Claire and Becka rushed to my side.
“Oh my God Emma I am so sorry!” Becka apologized.
“Who was it?” Claire asked, she had looped her arm with mine and I was not sure if it was a friendly gesture or if she was still too stoned to walk straight.
“Come on! Tell us! Did you get in trouble?” Becka asked, stepping in front of me so I would have to answer.
“I think it will be okay.” I replied, not sure what had just happened. Part of me thought I had made it all up.
“Did you tell them our names?” Claire asked and I could tell all she was worried about was herself. I paused for a moment as they hung onto my every breath.
“No. I did not say your names. You guys owe me big!” I finally said, letting them off the hook. They threw their arms around me and thanked me. “I got to go. I can’t miss another class.” I said as I pried their arms off me. Claire frowned.
“Want to hang out later?” she asked. I did not know how to respond.
“Get to class, Ladies!” A voice boomed from behind us and goose bumps suddenly covered my body. It was Mr. Honor. Claire and Becka reluctantly let go of me and I snuck a glance over my shoulder. His blue eyes burned into mine. I turned back around quickly and made my way into class.
Everything was a blur. I could not keep my mind off him. At the end of class, Becka and Claire were waiting by the door.
“Here’s my number if you want to go out after classes.” Claire said as they followed me down the hall. It was the end of the day and Mr. Honor was standing outside of his classroom as we filed by. I could not help but stare at him.
“We were thinking of checking out that new scary movie everyone is raving about. It starts at eight.” She continued, oblivious to the fact that I was not paying attention.
“Sure.” I said, not really knowing what I was agreeing to. Mr. Honor smirked and I could not help but grin back at him.
“So you’ll come?” Becka asked and I stopped dead in my tracks as Mr. Honor slid back inside his classroom. “Yea, I’ll come. What time did you say?” I asked.
“Eight o’clock. Don’t be late, the place will be packed!” She warned me and I smiled.
“I’ll be there.” I promised and they headed off to the parking lot.
Chapter Four
I sat in my car replaying everything that had happened today. I cannot believe I was stupid enough to get high in school. I was praying Mr. Honor would not tell anyone, but I was certain my secret was safe with him. Still, I could not stop thinking about what he said about being in trouble. What did he mean exactly? As the parking lot cleared out, I started my car to leave. I cranked the radio and sang along Crimson and Clover as I made my way to my Aunt’s house.
I pulled into the driveway cursing myself for agreeing to a girl’s night out with the very girls who used me as a scapegoat. I could not entirely blame them. I was just as guilty for what we did. Besides, had I not done it I would have never gotten to spend extra time with Mr. Honor.
The house was empty and I was glad no one was around to ask me twenty questions about where I was going. I slipped into the shower to get ready for the movie. I stayed under the water, daydreaming until it ran cold. I wrapped a towel loosely around my chest and went to my bedroom to find something to wear. Most of my belongings were in boxes so I had to do a great deal of digging before finding something suitable. I decided on a little black dress and black heels. After getting dressed, I carefully curled the ends of my hair. By the time I was done applying mascara I looked at least a few years older. I sat around listening to music and cleaning the house to kill time. When it seven o’ clock I figured it was a safe to leave. By the time I got to the theater and we got our snacks it would only be a short wait for the movie. I jumped in my car and began backing out the driveway as headlights filled my rearview mirror and a horn beeped. I threw my car into park and sighed loudly. My Aunt pulled her car alongside mine.
“Where ya’ headed?” She asked, as her male passenger looked off, seemingly uninterested and completely wasted.
“Heading to the movies, don’t wait up.” I called over the engines and smiled.
“Oh, we won’t!” She replied and her cheesy grin made me nauseous. I rolled my eyes and backed the rest of the way out of the driveway.
Finding the movie theater in the dark was a lot harder than I had anticipated. I had to text Claire and Becka several times before I finally saw the great big theater sign along the side of the highway. I made three passes around the parking lot before I found an available space. Everyone had come out to see the new horror flick Slash. I suddenly felt self-conscious about my dress and wondered if I should leave quickly before anyone saw me. I could claim my car broke down or ran out of gas. It was too late. I spotted Becka and Claire making their way across the parking lot waving at me to get my attention. I reluctantly got out of the car and straightened my dress.
“Stop tugging at that! You look great!” Becka reassured me. She was wearing a similar outfit in deep purple.
“Thanks.” I said shyly, tucking my hair behind my ear.
“What am I, chopped liver?” Claire asked from behind us, half-joking.
“You look great, Claire!” I said, shooting her a smile. She smiled back and I knew she was just being insecure. She was very much like me in that way. We waited in line outside of the building to get our tickets.
“Do you have that new teacher, Mr. Honor?” Becka asked me but did not wait for me to answer. “God, he is f**king hot!” she said fanning herself. I smiled and nodded my head.
“His eyes” Claire added and I bit my lip and waited for the line to move. After a few moments of gushing over our teacher, they finally changed the topic to clothing, another subject I did not like to talk about. Luckily, the line was moving quickly and we were able to get our tickets and move inside to the next line for our snacks. When all was said and done we had spent over twenty dollars apiece, but Becka and Claire assured me that it would be worth every penny.
Most of the moviegoers were hanging out in the lobby so we were able to score some good seats near the front. I always preferred to sit in the back but Claire insisted that the closer to the blood and guts you where, the better. The lights dimmed and a hush fell over the crowd as the previews started to play. It took an entire fifteen minutes before the movie started, but Becka and Claire had made a list of all the new movies coming out that we would have to go see.
When the movie finally began, the room fell completely silent. Within a few moments they would all be screaming, myself included. My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest. This was worth every penny and I was glad I had decided to come.
An hour into the film I excused myself to use the restroom. The line curved out of the door. I played on my cell phone and stepped forward as the line moved oblivious to my surroundings. That was until a woman’s giggles broke my train of thought. I glanced up to see a man and a woman locked in each other’s arms. He was kissing her neck and she playfully smacked him on the chest. Just as I realized I was staring the man and woman were kissing each other passionately. His eyes opened and my heart caught in my throat. Mr. Honor was staring back at me and I could not look away. My face burnt red but his gaze held mine. I bit my lip as jealousy bubbled through me.
“Your turn” A teenaged boy called from behind me. I glanced back at the bathroom and saw that the line had completely vanished in front of me.
“Sorry.” I replied and stepped into the small room. I splashed some water on my face hoping it would magically make the blush fade from my cheeks. Of all people to catch making out at the movies, I would have never guessed I would see Mr. Honor. I went to the bathroom and waited around a few more seconds before heading back out the door. I took a deep breath and pulled it open, glancing to the side of the hall quickly. He was gone. I breathed a sigh of relief and headed back into my theater.
“What took you so long?” Claire asked as she handed me back my popcorn and candy.
“The line was crazy.” I replied, but did not elaborate on what else was crazy about it. I sunk deeper into my seat and tried to get back into the movie but my thoughts would not leave him. His burning gaze locked on mine for what felt like an eternity. There was something very creepy about our encounters but I could not get enough of him. Unfortunately, someone else already had him. I spent the next half of the movie trying to imagine what she looked like. She had dirty blonde curls that cascaded down her back and I assumed she was probably in her early twenties. She was no doubt gorgeous if she could hold his attention. My cheeks heated again as I realized she had not held his attention. His eyes were locked on to mine. Butterflies filled my stomach as I thought about what it had meant. In reality, I knew it probably did not mean anything. Perhaps he was embarrassed by seeing a student out of class while in such a compromising position.
Chapter Five
The crowd screamed in unison, jarring me from my thoughts. My popcorn flew from its container and Claire laughed at me.
“Scared?” she taunted. I nodded and smiled. I had no idea what was going on in the movie and at this point, I did not care. I was feeling a little sad seeing Mr. Honor with someone else, not that I had a right to feel jealous, but for some reason, I had thought on some level that he liked me. I shook the thought from my head. It was stupid for me to let myself be caught up in a fantasy. I suddenly missed home and wanted nothing more than to leave this place and never come back. I slunk down in my seat and waited for the movie to end.
Twenty long minutes later the credits where rolling and I could not be happier. We waited for the majority of the other moviegoers to file out before finally making our way towards the exit.
Becka and Claire were rambling on about going to some party and getting drunk. I made up a lame excuse about having a curfew so I could go home. I did not feel much like partying.
The drive home seemed longer than the trip to the theater even though I did not get lost this time. My thoughts flashed to Becka and Claire inviting me to the movies. I was sure Mr. Honor had overheard our conversation. In my overactive imagination, I pictured running into him there. I just had not factored in that he would not be alone.
I was relieved to see the driveway empty when I pulled into my aunt’s house. The last thing I wanted was to hear her raving about the new man of the hour. It was late so I was sure I would not see her again until tomorrow. I stalked into my bedroom and threw my shoes into the corner. I pulled off my dress, not bothering to unzip it and slipped into an oversized t-shirt from my old school.
I grabbed my old yearbook and walked into the kitchen for a drink. I slid the milk out of the way and grabbed a can of soda, along with a cheap bottle of vodka. I carried everything into the living and clicked on the television. I watched on old romance movie as I drank a small swig from the bottle. The alcohol burned my throat and I coughed and sputtered. I quickly chased it down with my soda as tears filled the rims of my eyes. I flipped open the book and ran my fingers over the indents left by the pen my friend’s had used to sign it. My body began to feel warm and I took a longer swig from the bottle, wiping a drip from my chin. I thought about packing my things and heading back to Michigan. I knew it would never be the same there. Everyone looked at me with pity after my parents had died. They treated me as if I was a toddler who could not take care of myself. At least in Florida most had no idea the situation I had come from. Only a few teachers and the school guidance counselor had the gory details. I wiped a wayward tear from my cheek and put the bottle to my lips again. The sadness magnified as the alcohol took effect, but I did not care. I knew if I drank enough I would forget about it all. I flipped through the pages as my tears fell onto the glossy paper. I ran my fingers over the wet marks and the signatures smudged across the book.
“No!” I cried as I wiped harder. I was officially breaking down. I grabbed the book and threw it across the room. It collided with a picture hanging on the far wall causing it to fall and shatter on impact. “Fuck!” I yelled as I stumbled over to the mess to clean it. My vision was blurred and as I grabbed a piece of the jagged glass, it cut me deeply across the palm of my hand and up my wrist. Blood ran freely down my fingers and dripped onto the old picture of my Aunt and Mother. I collapsed onto the floor, sobbing as I hugged the picture tightly.
Chapter Six
“Emma! Dear god! Emma! Call the police!” My Aunt screamed as she shook me. I blinked several times but could not open my eyes fully in the light. The shaking had turned my stomach and I lurched forward, vomiting all over the living room floor.
“Emma! Why would you try to kill yourself?” She shouted through tears as a man in the background talked in a panic on the phone.
“I didn’t…” I whispered but my throat was raw and sore from crying the night before.
“Hush now.” She replied, soothingly as she pulled me into her chest and hugged me tightly. “Grab her some water!” she yelled off to the man in the other room. He quickly appeared with a glass of water. He held the glass up to my mouth and began pouring it down my throat. I coughed and gagged as my Aunt smacked the man hard on the arm. “You’re going to drown her!” she shouted.