He watched me for a few moments before breaking the six-day-old ice. “You know she loves you.”
“I know.”
“You love her.”
“Yep.” Even after the vicious shit she’d pulled, I couldn’t stop myself. Because something about the way she’d snapped just wasn’t right, wasn’t her. Then again, seventeen unanswered text messages, six voice mails, and a flat-out refusal to come to the phone when I called her hospital room wasn’t exactly sending any another message.
“Then it’s going to be okay. It sucks right now, but you’ll find a way to work it out.”
I slammed the bottle onto the counter, which was better than punching something like I wanted. “What kind of world do you live in now, Josh? Fairy tales and fucking unicorns? I couldn’t be happier that you and Ember are perfect, that you make it work, but guess what? It doesn’t work out for everyone. She might love me, but she doesn’t want me.”
“Then go beg.”
“I’ve tried!”
“Try harder.”
“This isn’t the same as you and Ember. You had months to work your shit out. I have days. It’s not the same, and I’m not you!”
“No, you’re better, and a hell of a lot stronger than I am. What? You don’t think I know about my mom’s medical bills?”
Shit. “How long have you—”
“A year. Now shut the fuck up and let me talk. It’s not the money, it’s the time it took you to track everything down and then cover the tracks so I wouldn’t know. You’re the only reason I could afford to stay in college, and therefore the only reason I have Ember. I’ve never known anyone as fucking stubborn as you are, and I get it now, seeing how you grew up. So use it to your advantage.”
“I can’t sit by and watch her kill herself.” I cleared my throat after my voice broke, and ran my thumb absently over the inked letters on my arm.
Josh saw the motion. “C to G. Cradle to grave. I know all about the promise you made to Anna, and I know you think this is just like her, or your mom, but it’s not. Paisley can’t control this condition or make it stop. This isn’t something she can quit, and there’s no right decision. You’re not right. She’s not right. But you have to ask yourself, if you don’t stand by her now, can you live with yourself later?”
The beer turned sour in my mouth as his implications hit me. What if something happened to Paisley and I wasn’t there? “How did everything get so fucked up? A week ago I had everything I wanted.”
“Man, she’s still Paisley. You’re still you. This shit isn’t too far gone. Go Tuesday after selection. We’ll be done by one, and you could be in Birmingham by four.”
“I think that’s a great idea,” General Donovan interrupted, sliding onto the empty stool next to me. He flagged the bartender. “Can I get a seven and seven?”
“Sir.” I tensed as the bartender jumped to fill his order.
“Relax,” he ordered. “What? You’ve never seen a general in a bar before?” A ghost of a smile tripped over his lips as he sipped at the drink.
“Not this one, sir,” I answered.
“Well, I wasn’t always a general. I used to be a butter-bar lieutenant chasing after a sweet little southern thing who preferred the seat at the very end.” He took another swallow, and I almost fell off my stool when Josh elbowed me in the ribs. Asshole. “Are you going to ask me about her or not?”
Hell, yes. “How is she?”
He angled on his stool to face me. “Heartbroken, both literally and figuratively, but she’s stable. Morgan’s staying with her tonight.”
Heartbroken. I’d had my hand in both. “I’m so sorry.”
“Jagger, I was outside that room and heard every word. She threw everything but the kitchen sink at you, and she got what she wanted.”
“What exactly was that, sir?”
“To push you away. She knows she’s not exactly free of complications.”
My beer hit the bar a little too hard. “Her complications don’t matter to me. I will take her, heart whole or chest cracked wide open. Didn’t she trust me to stay?”
“Hell, yes, son. She knew you would. You’re her biggest blessing and her worst nightmare. She doesn’t want to be the reason you don’t get your aircraft or graduate.”
“She destroyed me,” I whispered, looking down into my bottle like it had the answers.
“She thinks she saved you, and then to get blindsided by Peyton’s secret… Well, you two have some damnable timing. I wouldn’t normally meddle—I’m not her mother—but I don’t think she can do this without you, or the fight you bring out in her.” A wry smile lifted the corner of his lips. “You bring her to life.”
I kept my face straight, as professional as I could. This wasn’t the guy to lose my temper on.
“You don’t agree?” he asked.
“Sir, I’m sitting in a bar, discussing my love life with the commanding general of the post. Let’s not pretend this isn’t awkward.” Josh nearly spit out his ice water next to me, but I ignored him.
“I only see a dad talking to the guy his daughter is in love with,” he answered. “Look, you two are like super magnets—it doesn’t matter what’s between you, you’re still drawn to each other. I saw it from the first time she said your name. I hated it then, but I’m thankful for it now.” He swirled the ice in his nearly full glass. “Now, are you ready for that final check ride in the morning?”