My self-consciousness flew out the window as I watched a woman bouncing topless on the shoulders of Derek from Filth. My heart sank, and I hoped that Sarah was not anywhere near him.
“What’s wrong?”
I realized I was squeezing Tucker’s hand and relaxed my grip.
“Just worried about Sarah.”
Tucker nodded, running his hand over his hair from back to front.
“What is it?” I asked, angling toward him so I could read his face.
“Nothing.”
“What?”
Tucker sighed and took a step back from me, his eyes going to the drop ceiling before landing back on me.
“She’s an awesome chick, and I am glad you have found a friend.”
“But?” I took a step closer to him.
“She’s had it rough, and she can get kind of . . . intense.”
I laughed and I saw his face change from concerned to downright confused.
“She’s had it rough?” I asked, making sure I had heard him correctly.
“Look, I know you didn’t have it easy either, and you turned out just fine. More than fine. But not everyone handles stress and heartache the way you do. I’m not saying she is a bad person. She’s a cool chick.”
I cocked an eyebrow at his choice of words and he rolled his eyes.
“You know what I mean. She’s a nice person. Just be careful. She tends to push people away.”
“I’ll be careful.” I leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek. “Thanks for looking out for me.”
“That’s my job.” Tucker looped his arm around my neck and pulled my head to his as we continued to navigate through the crowd.
“I don’t need anyone to take care of me,” I reminded him as my eyes fell on Sarah and Eric.
“Yeah, I know. You have told me that before,” he joked as he followed my gaze, and the smile slipped from his face.
“You have a problem with those two getting together?”
His arm flexed behind my neck and I knew the answer to my question.
“Those two are a ticking f**king time bomb, sweetheart. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” As soon as the words left his mouth, he nodded to Eric who returned the gesture. “Let’s go watch the train wreck.”
On our path to the others we grabbed a few beers from some random groupie who had no problem running her hand over the front of my boyfriend’s jeans while his arms were around me. He took a step back out of her reach. I raised my glass and Tucker placed his arm in front of mine, keeping me from spilling my beer all over her, but the look on his face was one of amusement.
“She has it coming.” I tipped the cup to my lips and downed half the contents in a single gulp.
“Choose your battles wisely. We have had enough to last us a lifetime.” He tilted his cup to his lips and took a drink.
“I know. I’m sorry. This is a lot to get used to.”
“Trust me. I get it.” We had made our way to Sarah and E and we both said hello politely. “Just remember who is bunking with me tonight.”
“Oh, shit. I don’t want to listen to that shit.” Eric looked revolted.
“You can stay on our bus,” Sarah suggested as she took a drink from her cup.
“Yeah, I’m sure Derek would give you a warm welcome,” Tucker said to no one in particular. He was right. Sarah and Derek had a volatile relationship, and the last thing Damaged needed was a rift between them and their opening act. We still had to finish out this tour in some measure of peace.
“Fuck Derek,” Eric replied, and Tucker clenched his jaw. Eric was the type of guy that went against the grain and refused to listen to reason.
“‘Fuck Derek’?” a voice called from behind us, and I was thankful that it was Terry and not another member of Filth.
I could tell it rattled Sarah who slid farther away from Eric.
“You need a refill?” I asked over the music that began to fill the awkward silence.
“Sure.” She smiled as she grabbed my hand, tugging me out of Tucker’s arms. I didn’t want to have any part of Damaged’s heated conversations, and I knew Sarah had realized that she had placed Eric in a bad position.
“What are you doing?” I asked when we had gotten far enough away that we weren’t in danger of being overheard.
“I just want what you and Tuck have. It’s not fair.” She was clearly already drunk, but she still grabbed a bottle of Jack and poured a few shots into her glass, holding the bottle up to offer me some. I shrugged and let her fill my solo cup about halfway with the amber liquid.
“I get it.” I took a small drink, cringing at the nasty warmth of the alcohol.
“My ex is dictating my happiness. It’s not fair. I just want to be able to live my life and be happy.”
“I’ve been there. Trust me. I had a pretty rocky relationship before Tucker.” I relaxed my throat and took a bigger drink, wishing I hadn’t brought up my past.
“Yeah? How’d you get him to leave you alone?”
“Tucker killed him.” All of the air left my lungs, and I immediately regretted my words.
“You are so twisted.” She laughed and downed her shots in one sip.
I was thankful she assumed I was joking and I wouldn’t have to go into the horrid details of that final night with Jax.
“Another?” She grabbed the bottle, shaking it in her hand as the contents sloshed against the glass.
I glanced back at the guys who looked like they were still in the middle of a heated conversation, and I had no desire to play referee to a bunch of angry rockers.
“Absolutely,” I yelled over the music as I held out my cup. A hand slinked up the back of my dress and caused me to jump, and the brown liquid poured over my hands. “What the hell?”
“Jesus, Cass, I’m sorry!” Sarah apologized for the mess, oblivious to why I was upset. I spun around and was face-to-chest with a man covered in tattoos and with a bull ring dangling from his nose.
“What the hell is wrong with you, ass**le?” I yelled, gathering the attention of a few bystanders.
“Since when do groupies get upset when someone wants some ass? You don’t have to be a f**king bitch.” He laughed, sticking out his pierced tongue between his teeth.
“I’m not a groupie, you f**king pervert!” I pulled back my fist, fully intending to hit him right on that stupid target dangling from his face when Sarah shoved me aside and cracked him across his cheek. The sound of her slap was so loud that even the tattooed freak looked to me in stunned silence as he tried to figure out what the hell had just happened.
“Who’s the bitch now?” Sarah was laughing like a maniac as she continued to taunt the guy. Tucker and the rest of the band had shoved anyone who was in their way aside and now were standing behind the ass-grabber looking positively livid. Great.
“It’s fine. It’s over,” I yelled, holding out my hands to keep them back, but the guy had a death wish and turned around to face them, wiping his lip that had split against his teeth.
“Did he touch you?” Tucker looked around the man to me, not the least bit fazed by the way the guy was staring him down.
“Tucker . . .”
“Answer the question.” He wasn’t in the mood, and I certainly didn’t want to be on the receiving end of his bad attitude, but I also wasn’t going to let him get thrown in jail over this douche bag.
“It was a misunderstanding, and it’s over.” I looked to Sarah who nodded in agreement.
“See, just a misunderstanding,” the guy chuckled. “Turns out she f**king liked it.”
As the words left his mouth so did a spray of blood, followed by what looked like a tooth, but I couldn’t be sure it wasn’t the barbell from his tongue. Terry was on top of him the second he hit him, grabbing his shirt and yanking him toward the back door. A security guard pushed his way through the crowd of onlookers and grabbed the guy by the arm, yanking him away from Terry. Another joined him and together they hauled the jerk out of the back entrance. I didn’t know what they did with him from there, but I was sure I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it.
“Is this going to happen after every concert?”
Sarah laughed and shook her head, and we both looked at the band.
“I guess that means the party is over.” Tucker ran his hand over his hair the way he always does when something is on his mind.
“We can hang out a little longer if you want.” I shrugged, and Tucker gave me one of his heart-stopping smiles.
“Yeah? You haven’t had enough of this yet?”
“That’s what she said!” I yelled with a laugh and Sarah snorted.
“No, Cass. Just no.” Eric put up his hand with a dead-serious look as he shook his head in mock disappointment.
“Whatever. That was a good one.” The other guys laughed at me as they refilled their cups. I held mine out for a few more shots, my body already warming as the liquor spread throughout my veins.
Tucker wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his chin on my shoulder.
“I love this dress on you, but maybe it isn’t such a good idea to have you walking around like that at the after-parties.”
“I can take care of myself, Tucker.” I rolled my eyes, knowing I was sounding like a broken record. He was only concerned for my safety, but he didn’t need to be. I needed to learn how to be independent, fierce, like Sarah. He wouldn’t always be able to stand up for me.
“I know you can take care of yourself.” He turned me around in his arms. “But I don’t want you to ever get hurt again. That motherfucker got off easy. I should have beaten his ass.” His fingers slid along my jaw and over my lips. His gaze dipped to my mouth. I could feel the anger rolling off him in waves, but he tried to conceal it.
“Fine.” I leaned in close to whisper in his ear. “You can take it off of me later.” I pulled back just enough to see his expression. His eyes darkened and his eyes hooded and the muscle in his jaw ticked under the surface.
“You sure you’re not ready to go back to the bus?” His mouth hovered over mine so I was breathing his air.
“Soon. I promise.” I gave him a quick peck on the lips and took a step back.
Tucker emptied his cup and poured more alcohol inside. A song that I recognized came on the radio and my liquid courage had kicked in. I began to sway my hips and nod my head to the beat as Sarah grabbed my arm, nearly throwing me off balance.
“Let’s dance!” she yelled a little too loudly in my ear. I winced in pain.
“I’m not much of a dancer.”
“Come on. I want to show Eric what he is missing,” she whispered as she looked around me to Eric who was chatting up a groupie. “And who cares what anyone here thinks? Enjoy life. No one gets out alive.”
“Fine. But don’t have high expectations. I don’t think I could walk straight, let alone keep rhythm.”
“Are you kidding me? Look how some of these nutbags are wiggling around out there. I’m not sure if they are dancing or if we should call an ambulance.” I let her tug me along as she made fun of the crazy outfits and questionable piercing choices of the other partiers. I was laughing so hard I was nearly in tears as she stopped, causing me to run into her back.
“Maybe you are a little too drunk for this.” She turned around, looking at me like I had sprouted a horn.
“That’s it. I’m going to have to break it down.” I narrowed my eyes as I rotated my hips. Sarah laughed so hard no sound came out of her mouth.
“See how much fun you can have when you let your hair down? This is what it’s all about. Screw what anyone else thinks or does. Make yourself happy. Live in the moment.”
I stopped moving, absorbing all of the things she was telling me as alcohol fogged my brain.
“Ughh . . . dance!” Her fingers wrapped around my hips and she pulled me closer, guiding my body with her hands. I threw my hands above my head and yelled as I tossed my head to the side, curls falling over my face. I’d never let loose like this before, and I couldn’t believe how good it felt to feel so free.
“This is so much fun!”
“See! I told you.” She grabbed my hand and twirled me around playfully. My eyes caught Tucker’s, and he still looked like he was dwelling on the ass**le who had grabbed my ass. He also looked like he had drunk a few shots too many.
Sarah pressed her lips together in a thin line and cocked her head to the side when she saw my look of concern.
“He’s fine. The guys party like this all of the time. Stop worrying so damn much.”
I turned my back to her, pressing my bottom into her as we shimmied together. Tucker leaned back against the drink table, taking small sips of his drink, his eyes locked onto mine. Derek made his way through the crowd, bobbing his head to the music.
“You always knew how to move, Sarah.” He shook his hair from his face. Sarah’s body slowed behind me, and I heard her suck in a deep breath. “Can I cut in?”
I glanced over his shoulder to Tucker who slammed his cup down on the table and stood. The last time I had seen that look on his face, he was face-to-face with Jax.
“I’m gonna grab a drink.” I glanced over my shoulder, looking for confirmation from Sarah that she was okay. She nodded slightly, and I slipped by Derek and made my way to Tucker.
“What was that about?” he asked before I could reach him.
“He wanted to dance with Sarah,” I replied, irritated at what seemed like jealousy. Her name got the attention of Eric who spun to look at me before his eyes searched the dance floor. My stomach churned as he located her with her ex.