Crystal had decided to keep her encounter with Mark to herself, but now she found that she desperately wanted to tell her friends what had happened. It wasn’t every day that you spent the weekend with the man of your dreams. Why not enjoy it? “I didn’t exactly do the shopping,” she confessed. Both Mia and Gwen just looked confused now.
“Ohhh, you ordered it online,” Gwen piped up. “It gives me a big thrill every time the UPS man shows up at our door with another package. Dominic says I’m way out of control, but God, I love Amazon.”
Smiling in response, Crystal noticed that Mia looked disappointed. Well, that certainly wouldn’t last for long. . . . “I didn’t shop online,” she added before taking a drink of the water their waiter had dropped off. “Someone bought this for me,” she tossed out as she picked up her menu. “What’s everyone having?”
The table was dead silent for a moment before Mia pulled Crystal’s menu from her hand and huffed out, “What we’re having is an explanation. Who bought you that dress and those do-me shoes?”
Gwen choked out a laugh before looking around nervously to see if anyone was listening to them. “Don’t make a pregnant woman beg. That’s just cruel.”
“I’ll tell you,” Crystal began, trying to control her own excitement, “but you’re not going to believe me.”
“Do you think we can get away with having a margarita with our lunch?” Mia asked, sounding half-serious. “It sounds like we need alcohol of some sort for this.”
Rubbing her stomach ruefully, Gwen shook her head. “Oh no, I don’t think so. If I have to go dry, then so do you. Now please put Mia out of her misery, Crystal, and tell us what’s going on.”
Unable to hold it in any longer, Crystal blurted out, “I spent the weekend with Mark DeSanto, and he bought me these clothes! Well, at least his assistant did, but I’m sure Mark paid for them.”
“Holy shit sticks!” Gwen gasped out before turning red when all conversation nearby ceased. “Er . . . sorry,” she murmured before dropping her voice.
“You slept with Mark?” Mia sounded as if she was being strangled as she choked out the words. “This is huge! You tramp, how in the world did that happen?”
Gwen snickered, wiggling her eyebrows. “I think we know how it happened. First, you both take off your clothes, then . . .”
Crystal looked down, knowing her cheeks had probably flamed bloodred, as Mia tossed a wadded-up napkin at Gwen. “Duh, I wasn’t asking about that. Believe me, Seth gave me a detailed demonstration of what goes where just hours ago. And I’m betting that Dominic did the same to you. So, since we’ve covered that, let’s get back to Crystal—who has a lot of explaining to do.”
Holding her hands up to quiet the questions her friends were tossing out, Crystal began to explain what had occurred. “It started off kind of badly—so don’t get too excited.” At their look of shock, she quickly added, “I mean, it wasn’t like a normal date or anything.”
“How in the world is that man so cocky if he’s got a tiny dick?” Mia mused. “Sure, some might say it’s not the size but how it’s used—but damn. I would have guessed that Mark’s was huge.”
“Me too,” Gwen whispered. “That just negates my belief in the ‘swagger.’”
Feeling as if her eyes were going to cross as she tried to figure out what her friends were talking about, Crystal asked, “The what?”
Mia held her hands apart. “You know—men with big peckers have that certain kind of walk. At least we’ve all found that to be true.” Gwen nodded her agreement as Mia continued. “So with you telling us that Mark has a petite package, it’s blown all of our theories to hell. I will give the man full respect for owning his shortcomings, though. He walks around Danvers like he has a tree between his legs.”
“But it’s just like a limb instead,” Gwen bemoaned solemnly as she patted Crystal’s hand. “It’s okay, sweetie. As long as he makes you happy—that’s all that matters, right?”
Mia jumped in her seat, as if jolted. “Oh, of course. Big ones are overrated. Sometimes a girl just wants to cuddle.”
Crystal rubbed her forehead, wondering how the conversation got so far off track when it suddenly hit her. “Oh, my God.” She started laughing. “Mark and I didn’t have sex, so I never saw his—size. But I did feel it and I don’t think there is any reason at all to call his manhood into question.”
“I’m confused,” Gwen said uncertainly. “I thought you spent the weekend with him?”
“I tossed my cookies all over him in front of the building on Friday and he took me home with him,” Crystal revealed, trying to avoid any more crazy speculation.
In true Mia fashion, her friend skipped right over the truth and circled back to a certain body part. “Tell us more about your inspection of Mark’s most valuable asset? How did that come about?”
Gwen, always being the more patient one, said, “Crys, just start from the beginning. I, for one, want to hear the entire story. You’ve been stalking the man for so long. This is like something from a romance novel.”
“Thank you, Gwen,” Crystal huffed out. “So, after our unfortunate meeting, Mark took me to his house and had a doctor come over to examine me. It was determined that it was just something viral, and sadly, I wasn’t even aware of where I was until Sunday. Then Mark made me breakfast and asked me to stay until Monday. Just in case I had a relapse. He had his assistant, Denny, buy me this outfit to wear today—and that about sums it up.” It was all she could do to keep a straight face as her friends looked at each other before turning pitiful eyes back to her.