“I’ll go out and get all of this,” Autumn said, waving the list at me after we’d said goodbye to Brenna.
I watched as Autumn threw her phone in her purse and grabbed the keys to the apartment. O’Dea had texted her a few times to check on things. Control freak. As his sister prepared to leave, I got this sudden feeling of claustrophobia. It tightened my chest. And suddenly staying here alone felt like a worse idea than going out in public with a bruised-up face. “Hey,” I burst out, “can I come with you?”
She looked surprised. “What about your bruising?”
“You know,” I glanced out of the patio doors to the river outside, “I’m willing to put up with the stares if it means getting a little fresh air. I feel like I’ve been in this apartment forever.”
“Of course. You’re not a prisoner. Hey,” she dug through her purse, “I have my makeup with me.” She pulled out a cosmetics bag that had to take up all the room in her purse. “I can do your makeup if you want. Cover up the bruises?”
Relief washed over me. “I’d like that.”
And that’s how I found myself feeling pampered as Autumn took great joy in doing my makeup. She also twisted my hair into a messy, stylish bun. When I looked in the mirror, I barely recognized myself. The makeup softened my angles so my face somehow looked fuller.
It made me want to cry.
O’Dea’s sister saw the shimmer of wet in my eyes and clutched my shoulder. “You did what you had to do, Skylar. But it’s time to start taking care of yourself again.”
Angry at myself, confused, questioning every decision I’d made in the last eighteen months, I stood. “Let’s go.” It came out harsher than I meant.
We were silent as we left the apartment, Autumn seeming unsure of me now. “It feels weird,” I said, trying to break the awkwardness as we got in the elevator. “I can’t remember O’Dea bringing me here, so I’ve felt like I was floating in a box over the Clyde. It’s weird to be in a building I don’t remember walking into.”
“Killian said you were pretty out of it.”
“You two seem close?” The question slipped out before I could stop it.
“Well, that’s what happens when you only have each other. My uncle James isn’t the most affectionate man in the world,” she said dryly. “I don’t know how Killian can work for him. I’d have killed him by now.”
“O’Dea works for your uncle?”
“Yeah. Uncle James owns the label.”
That I did not know. “So, O’Dea is in line to take over?”
Autumn sneered, “Only if Killian lives up to James’s exacting standards.”
And suddenly everything made sense. “And I’m betting there’s nothing O’Dea wants more than to run that label one day.”
“And he deserves to. He’s brought in more money for that label in the last five years than anyone. Does my uncle acknowledge that? No. He makes Killian jump through a never-ending cycle of hoops. Nothing my brother does is ever good enough.”
Clearly, I wasn’t the only one whose family was a sore point.
As if he’d heard us talking, O’Dea called Autumn as we stepped out into the fresh air. It was cold but Autumn had her car so I’d only put on a blazer she’d bought me. It was remarkably similar to the one she wore. I sucked in the fresh air, letting the cold breeze wash over me. My skin prickled to delicious life under its crisp caress.
“Everything went great,” Autumn said into her phone as she led me over to a white Range Rover. If I remembered correctly, O’Dea drove a Sport. Autumn’s was the smaller Evoque. Apparently, they were fans.
The car beeped and I managed to pull myself up into the passenger seat with my good arm as Autumn got into the driver side.
“I’m taking Skylar to the store for food . . . We’re getting everything on the list Brenna gave us . . . because she needs fresh air . . .” She sighed. “She’s fine . . . makeup . . . my makeup . . . Aren’t you busy? . . . We’re fine . . . Fine . . . okay, okay . . . Sainsbury’s . . . Yes, that one . . . Okay, we’ll see you there. Bye.” She hung up and shot me a look. “Killian is meeting us at the store.”
“God, he is a control freak.”
Autumn’s face pinched with annoyance as she started the engine. “My brother is not a control freak. He’s worried about you.”
Oh yeah, sure. “Really? He’s so worried that he told me if I didn’t agree to sign to his label, I’d be back out on the streets.”
“He said that?”
“I asked him if that’s what he meant and he didn’t deny it. He said he was businessman, not a philanthropist.”
Autumn tutted. “That man. Seriously. He didn’t mean that,” she assured me. “He’ll probably kill me for telling you this, but there’s a big softie underneath that intimidating façade.”
“Oh yeah, he’s a giant teddy bear.”
She laughed at my sarcasm. “You’ll see.”
No, I wouldn’t. All I’d ever see in Killian O’Dea was the man who forced me back into a life I loathed.
* * *
“DO YOU KNOW HOW PROUD I am of you?”
I grinned at my mom. “It’s all you. You never stopped believing.”
“She sure didn’t.” Bryan wrapped his arm around Mom and pulled her into his side for a kiss, making her giggle like a little girl.
He made her happy, so I decided not to ruin the moment by reminding him that he never believed in me. Still, while my mom wasn’t looking, I shot him a dirty look and he gave me a warning one in return.
When he and Mom got serious a couple of years ago, Micah and I were getting serious about making our band a success. We knew we had something great and my mom had been our biggest supporter. My dad died when I was a baby, so it had always been just me and Mom. And there was no one who believed in me more than my mother. She’d been my best friend for so long. I think if I hadn’t been so consumed with the idea of making Tellurian a success, I probably would have had a much harder time adjusting to the idea of Bryan.
As it was, he began to complain all the time to my mom about the money and energy she put in to helping a bunch of kids chase an “unrealistic dream.” He only backed off when it became a real sticking point in their relationship. And by that, I mean they almost broke up. However, the resentment simmered between the two of us. I could never really, truly like him. But I was civil for my mom’s sake.
Lately, however, my dislike for him was worsening. Ever since Tellurian’s debut single hit number one on the US Billboard, Bryan had become our biggest fan.
Asshole.
“I can’t believe I watched my baby on The Tonight Show last night.” Mom untangled herself from Bryan to come and hug me for the hundredth time. I laughed, breathing in the familiar floral scent of Miss Dior, her favorite perfume. I wrapped my arms around her slender waist and held on tight.
I’d been traveling the US for a while and was only back in Billings because we were playing The Pub Station for the first time that night. I planned to spend every second I could with my mom. The band’s success was more than I could have dreamt of, but I had no idea how much I’d miss my mother.
Mom pulled back to grin at me. “I got cake.”
“Cake is always good.”
“Not just any cake. It’s an eighteenth birthday cake. ’Cause I missed it.” She pouted. “I can’t believe I missed my baby turning eighteen.”
“I know.” I stared at her, drinking in her oh-so-familiar pretty face. “I miss you.”
Tears shimmered in her blue eyes. “Oh, baby girl, you have no idea how much I miss you. But I am so happy you got everything you ever wanted.”
Not everything, I thought. Micah and I had decided not to be together for the sake of the band, but he liked to torture me daily. Flirting with me, touching me, shadowing me. And then he’d go and blow off his pent-up frustration with a groupie.
Oh yeah, he was loving the groupies.
That’s why I lost my virginity to a teen drama series heartthrob at a stranger’s house party in LA instead of losing it to the boy I was in love with.