I was about to call Killian when my phone binged with a text.
Autumn: Are you alone yet? Can I come over? Xx
Me: Yeah, of course.
Autumn: I’ll be there in five. Xx
Wondering if she’d just been at the label and hoping she wasn’t coming over because Killian was mad at me, I sucked in a breath and dialed my boyfriend’s number. Because fuck it. He was my boyfriend.
It rang off.
So I called again.
He picked up. “I’m running out of a meeting into another, Skylar, I don’t have time to talk.”
He sounded pissed. “Good morning to you too. I thought you’d call.”
“I’ve been busy.”
“Too busy to see if I was all right after my band members came back into my life after a near two-year absence?”
“I gathered it went okay since they slept over.”
Was that his problem? “Killian, they’re like brothers to me.”
“Micah isn’t.”
“Which is why I crashed on my bed with Brandon and Micah took the couch.”
He went silent and I heard the rustle of movement and then a door closing before he practically growled down the phone. “You shared a fucking bed with one of them?”
My cheeks flushed. He made it sound like I’d done something wrong. I guess he didn’t realize how much Brandon felt like family to me. “Brandon might as well be blood related, that’s how much he’s like a brother to me. I would never have done that if he weren’t.”
“He’s not blood related and you did. Jesus, Skylar, you lost the fucking plot when you heard a voicemail from my one-night stand. You expect me to be okay with you sleeping in the same bed as another man?”
Feeling the situation escalate out of my control, panic fluttered in my chest. “Killian, I promise you that if you see me and Brandon together, you’ll get it. You’ll see we’re like brother and sister.”
“I take it they’re not leaving anytime soon, then?”
“They want to make sure I’m okay. And to do that, they want to come to the label today and meet you.”
“Fine,” he answered immediately, surprising me.
“Seriously?”
“Aye, seriously. I want to meet them too.”
I hesitated . . .”Are you still mad at me?”
“I don’t know. How would you feel if you found out I shared a bed with another woman last night?”
The thought made me want to grind my teeth together. “If that woman was Autumn, then I’d be fine with it. Which is exactly what we’re talking about here and you’ll see that for yourself today.”
He blew out what sounded like a beleaguered breath.
My heart clenched at the thought of him being angry with me, but I was also more than a little annoyed. “You know, it would be nice if you could put your jealousy aside to ask me if I’m okay.” When there was no response, an ache flared in my chest. “Okay then, what time should we meet you?”
“One o’clock should be fine.”
“See you then.”
“Skylar.” He stopped me as I was about to hang up. “I missed you too. I miss you whenever you’re not by my side.”
I closed my eyes as the panic eased but my irritation, and yes, hurt, remained.
At my silence, his voice lowered. “I’m sorry I’m a jealous prick. Are you okay?”
I slumped in relief. “Yes, I’m okay. I’ll be even better when I get you alone. After I’m done kissing every inch of you, we can talk about it.”
“I’m looking forward to it.” I heard the desire in his words. The need. God, I wished he were with me. Unfortunately, I’d have to wait.
“Before then, I’ll see you at the label.”
“See you then.”
I hung up, holding the phone to my chest, wishing that I was able to walk into the label at one o’clock and kiss the surliness right out of Killian O’Dea. Instead I’d have to pretend there was nothing more between us than an album. However, as soon as I got him alone, I was going to rock his world so hard, he’d forget all about being a grumpy pain in my ass.
Thankfully, keeping me from overthinking the last twenty-four hours, Autumn arrived—with coffee—not long after I hung up with Killian. After we’d settled and I told her how my night with the guys went, she shot me an apologetic look.
“I got your text while I was with Killian, so you should know he knows about the guys staying overnight.”
“It’s okay. I got off the phone with him. I know he wasn’t happy about it, but he’ll see when he meets Brandon that there’s absolutely nothing like that between us.”
“I really don’t think it’s Brandon that worries him. You’ve got to understand, Skylar, Killian researched you before he ever had feelings for you. He found article upon article about your romance with Micah. You guys were everywhere.”
That panic returned, as I began to fear that I wouldn’t be able to make Killian understand that I no longer was in love with Micah. “Those days are long gone. When I look at Micah now, I don’t feel any of what I used to feel. All that’s left is history, affection, and frustration that he’ll always see the world from his point of view and no one else’s.”
“Maybe today will help, then. Killian can see you interact.”
I nodded, hoping she was right. Then I studied my friend and how her perfect makeup was unable to hide the dark circles under her eyes. “You know, all we do lately is talk about me. I know I have a lot of crap going on, but that doesn’t mean I get to let you off the hook. What’s going on with you?”
Autumn threw me a tired smile. “Nothing.”
“I don’t believe that for a second.” I had a sudden horrible thought. “Shit. Darren hasn’t been bothering you, has he? You would have told us?”
She shook her head. “No, Darren is long gone.”
“Then what is it? Someone new?”
“Ugh, God no.” Autumn looked even more exhausted by the thought. “The last thing I need is to get into another relationship right now.”
“Then what is going on with you, Autumn? You mentioned something that’s been bothering me. I didn’t want to push about it because I didn’t think it was my place, but you’re my friend and I think it is my place. You said a while ago that you felt like you were lost.”
She grimaced. “You have so much more to deal with than me right now. We’re not talking about this.”
Worry suffused me. “We are talking about this. I’m officially concerned. What’s going on?”
“I’m just floundering. I feel like I have no purpose. Like I’m useless.”
“You are not useless. Don’t ever say that.”
“But what am I doing with my life? I occasionally run errands for Killian but other than that, I spend my days shopping and socializing. How dumb is that?”
“Hey,” I shook my finger at her, teasing, “there are socialites with over a hundred million Instagram followers. Those millions of followers don’t think they’re dumb.”
“Well, I do,” Autumn huffed. “Pot meet kettle.”
“Then what do you want to do about it?”
“That’s the thing. I don’t even know.”
We sat in contemplation while I processed her concerns and tried to figure out the most helpful response. The one that came to mind was the one that would piss Killian off the most, but in this instance, I had to put his sister before our relationship. “Maybe you should get away for a while.”
“Away?”
“Yeah. Go somewhere different. Somewhere you can think about you and what you want.”
“Is that what you did?”
“I ran away. There’s a difference. But if you want to put a less cowardly spin on what I did . . . let’s say I did take off to get some perspective. And it worked. I’m not telling you to run away. I’m telling you that going somewhere, traveling, getting some distance from this city and your life here, might give you some much-needed perspective.”