Suddenly, I was staring straight into Roddy’s angry eyes.
Guilt punched out my smugness. “Roddy—”
“I ken what ye’er doin’,” he seethed. “So let’s make a deal right here and now. I won’t push ye tae move on fae Jim, and ye won’t push me aboot Seonaid, and that means no rubbin’ who she’s fuckin’ in ma face. I get enough o’ that fae her.”
I didn’t want to agree to that. I wanted to know why he felt like he couldn’t tell her how he felt. Couldn’t he see that there was possibility there? Didn’t he see how jealous she got of Petra and the women who had come before her?
Yet, I couldn’t prod at the subject because that would give him license to prod at my relationship with Jim and all my hang-ups because of it.
I nodded, apology in my eyes, and watched him relax.
“So,” he said after a minute of silence, “Angie wants us aw tae have Sunday lunch together soon. Ye up for it?”
I couldn’t go on avoiding Angie forever. It wasn’t fair to her. At least this way, I’d have Seonaid and Roddy there as buffers between me and her rose-tinted view of my relationship with her son.
“Sure. Sounds good.”
I was in the middle of making the kids laugh as I read the first chapters of the second Harry Potter book when the common room door creaked open and Aidan appeared, throwing me an apologetic look. My pulse skittered at the sight of him, but I continued to read on, even as he got in Sylvie’s eye line and gestured for her to come to him. She did so reluctantly, and then I heard her say, “But I want to stay.”
That stopped me. I lowered my book. “Everything okay?” I called over to them.
Aidan straightened from being on his haunches, his hand on Sylvie’s shoulder. “Sylvie’s dad is on his way. He’s got the rest of the day off and wants to spend time with her.”
“Oh.” Disappointed I wouldn’t have my lunch with her, I nodded. “Well, of course.”
“But I want to stay,” Sylvie said, looking as disappointed as I felt.
I walked over to her and gave her a reassuring smile. “I bet your dad has a great day planned for you. And we’ll see each other soon.”
“Can’t I stay until the end?”
I looked up at Aidan and if I wasn’t mistaken, he was annoyed. Not at me but at Sylvie’s dad. He shook his head.
“I think your dad is on his way right now, sweetie.”
Her lip trembled and I thought my stoic little Sylvie might cry. However, she shook it off in a gesture that was so adult, it was unsettling. As though she were used to shaking off sad things and moving on quickly. “Okay. Next week?”
Again, I looked to Aidan for confirmation. He nodded and I smiled down at her. “Next week.”
She hugged me and then took her uncle’s hand. “Bye,” I said to him too. He gave me a frustrating nod of acknowledgment, and nothing more.
I bit my lip at the feeling of deflation that came over me when they left. Even though I knew better, I’d let Roddy’s opinion get to me. I’d started to think maybe he was right and Aidan had other reasons for wanting to get to know me. Maybe the sexual tension wasn’t all one-sided.
However, the fact that he could walk away from the few hours we spent together every week without seeming disappointed at all knocked me back down to earth.
I longed for Sylvie and Aidan like they were something I was addicted to.
Sylvie seemed to feel the same.
Aidan, however, probably really did see me as the slightly nutty young woman his kid had developed a surprising attachment to.
With them gone, I tried to get my head back in the game. I threw all my energy into acting out the book in my hand. I was good at pretending, so none of the kids were aware of my sadness as they laughed, gasped, and leaned in close to hear more about Harry and his friends.
After Jan came in to wrap up our time together, I said goodbye to everyone and got permission from Jan to use Aly’s bathroom to change in. Aly had her own private room, one that she was in more and more the sicker she got. I didn’t know how much longer she’d be attending my readings. That sweet kid was going to get worse before she got better.
I changed in her bathroom before Jan brought her back in, and then said goodbye to the nurses. The city had emptied of festival-goers, and I was contemplating buying a smoothie from the nearby Meadowlark Café when the sight of Aidan standing outside the hospital drew me to a stop.
He was on the phone and hadn’t seen me approach yet. What was he still doing here? Where was Sylvie?
I’m not going to lie—I thought about hurrying by him before he noticed me. I was unnerved by the way my heart galloped away from me anytime he was in the vicinity.
But he looked up, our eyes locked, and the whole world stood still. All I could hear was the rushing of blood in my ears.
And then Aidan telling whoever was on the phone that he had to go. He slipped his phone into his back pocket and walked over to me, stopping inside my personal space. I had to tilt my head to maintain eye contact.
“What are you still doing here? Did Sylvie’s dad come get her?”
Aidan nodded. “Aye. Thought I’d wait for you, though. See if you wanted to grab lunch.”
Shocked, I could only stare at him in reply. And then Roddy’s voice was in my head, telling me that Aidan was clearly interested in me. I couldn’t understand why someone older, sophisticated, gorgeous, and successful would be interested in me. And yes, I knew that didn’t say much for my self-esteem, but it was how I felt.
Before meeting him, I felt like I’d lived more years than I had. I was weary and tired and life had felt too much like a fight.
Then Aidan came along and he made me feel like I hadn’t seen anything of the world at all.
We were very different people, and I had no doubt wanting him was a bad idea … but my heart was racing, my skin was tingling, and there was a flurry of excitement in my belly. I felt alive. Awake. For the first time in forever, I felt anticipation fizzing inside of me and I didn’t want to lose that feeling yet.
“That sounds good.”
I wasn’t sure but I thought I saw relief flicker in his expression. But then it was gone and I only saw tension. “Are you sure you’re okay? Is it Sylvie’s dad?”
“This way,” he said instead, and I followed him to his SUV.
He opened the passenger door for me, something no guy had done for …well, ever … and I stood a little stunned by the gentlemanly action and how much I liked it.
“Nora?”
I looked up into his questioning eyes and hid my reaction with a smirk. “Just wondering if it’s smart of me to get into a car alone with a strange, older man.”
Aidan fought a smile. “You had to get that ‘older’ comment in again, didn’t you?”
Laughing, I stepped into the SUV, and he closed the door gently behind me. The car was spacious and luxurious inside. I’d never been in a Range Rover before and marveled at the comfort and style. It smelled of new leather too.
So, this was how the other half lived.
The driver’s door opened and unlike tiny me, Aidan slid into his seat. His seat was pushed way back to allow room for his long legs. Once he was clipped in, he put the car into drive and my eyes locked on his hands as they relaxed against the steering wheel. Like the rest of him, his hands were big, but they were definitely musician’s hands. Long-fingered, big-knuckled, but elegant somehow. A deep flip low in my belly made me squirm in embarrassment.
How could a guy’s hands turn me on so much?
“Cal is trying to spend more time with Sylvie.”
Jolted out of my sexual meanderings, I focused on his words because they were important. “Do you think that’s a bad thing?”
“No.” But his grip tightened momentarily on the steering wheel. “No.”
“Something about it is bothering you.”
We stopped at a red light, and Aidan looked at me. “I want stability for her. I worry that change right now could hurt her.”
“Change, how?”
“Seeing her dad more. Right now, he gets her two days every second week. But lately he’s been calling whenever he’s free and asking to see her.”