Why had Marco sent that letter? Why now? The effort of crying so hard was exhausting and yet the release was such a relief that I couldn’t stop.
“Lorrie talk to me. What’s wrong?”
“I’m sorry,” I choked out.
“You’re sorry?” she asked. Her voice had raised a pitch, indicating her concern. “What are you sorry about?”
I tried to get words out, but blubbered instead. My aunt stopped asking me to speak. I could hear her breathing tense on the other side.
Several minutes passed as I tried to gather myself. The prospect of telling her about the letter kept bringing fresh sobs. I couldn’t imagine what a mess I’d be trying to talk to Hunter about this.
“Lorrie, do you need me to come get you?” she asked carefully.
I swallowed a hard lump in my throat. “. . . He sent me a letter,” I said quietly.
“Who sent you a letter?”
I tried to say the name but it made me too scared, too angry, so it came out as a mumble.
“No!” she yelled. It was so loud I had to pull the phone away from my ear. “That monster?”
I said nothing. There was silence on the line for several seconds.
“What did it say?” she asked quietly.
I breathed in and out several times, trying to steady myself. “He wants me to forgive him.”
“Bastard,” my aunt spat. I was surprised to hear her swear. That was unlike her. “He has some nerve sending you something like that.”
“He also said he loves me,” I added.
“What?” she screamed, even more loudly than before. I heard my uncle grumble in the background.
I closed my eyes and tried to steady my breathing. “I couldn’t believe it either.”
“How did he know where you live?” She sounded panicked.
“I don't know . . . I don't think he does, it was forwarded from the Cook County Penal System, they must have our records.”
“Those idiots need to get it together, how could they forward something like that to you? Haven't we suffered enough already? I'm going to get a lawyer to give them a call.”
“No Aunt Caroline, forget it,” I pleaded. The thought of interacting with more lawyers and making the situation bigger than it already was made me sick.
She paused. “When did you get the letter?”
“A couple days ago.”
“And you’re just calling me now about it? What did you do when you got it?”
I sat up in my bed. “I’m sorry. After I saw the letter, I was so shocked . . . it . . . brought back everything I’ve been feeling since Mom died. I thought I was starting to do better but now I don’t know . . .”
There was a long pause on the line until my aunt broke it. “How are your classes going?” she asked, concern heavy in her tone.
“They were going okay before I got the letter,” I answered truthfully. “Now I’m not so sure.”
“Is it exams time?”
“Kind of,” I said, grimacing.
“Lorrie, I’ve seen you do this before. You need to come home.”
“No! I’m not going to let him win again. Not this easily.”
“Lorrie,” my aunt said delicately. “It’s not about winning and losing. It’s about surviving. Remember how you wandered off into the woods after hearing the news about your father? Uncle Stewart and I were worried sick.”
I’d told them I needed to take a walk after getting the news about my dad’s passing. My walk had turned into a several hour ordeal after I got lost in the woods behind their house. Uncle Stewart eventually came looking for me; they had never said it, but I was pretty sure they thought I’d gone the same route my dad did.
“I know, Aunt Caroline, but I have to take some time to see if I can figure this out. I’m not going to forgive myself if I run away unless I absolutely have to.”
“Lorrie, I’m not asking,” she said, her voice turning hard. “I’m sending Uncle Stewart to pick you up tomorrow.”
My stomach soured. “What? You can’t make me come home!”
“Then I’ll come with him so we can at least keep our eyes on you. I’m worried sick, and I know Uncle Stewart will be too the instant I tell him what happened.”
“No, you don’t have to do that!” I said hastily. “I’m fine! Just give me a couple days. I promise I’ll keep you in the loop.”
“We need to at least see you, Lorrie,” Aunt Caroline pleaded. “And I’m going to have a very hard time leaving you there unless I feel one-hundred percent certain that you really are fine.”
“Okay, okay. Maybe I can take the bus back to Indiana for a few days.”
There was silence on the line as my aunt was thinking. “Is there a bus available tomorrow?” she asked tentatively.
I stood up and went to my desk. “Let me check.”
Once I was at my desk, I did a search for the buses leaving for Indiana the next day. My aunt waited on the line.
“Yeah,” I said, “looks like there’s one for nine a.m. tomorrow.”
“Okay, dear. Buy that ticket and I’ll give you the money when you get home. If you don’t get on that bus, I’m sending Uncle Stewart to pick you up on Monday.”
“You won’t have to do that,” I said.
“Good . . . Is everything else going okay? What’s going on with that boy I met with all the tattoos? Hector?”
“Hunter,” I said, a small laugh escaping my lips despite the tear rolling down my cheek. “We’re actually dating now. Since last week.”
“Oh! That’s exciting,” she said, apparently trying to change the depressing tone of the conversation to a brighter one. “I’m glad you two finally shared your feelings for each other.”
“Me too,” I said, a smile on my face for the first time in what felt like forever.
“What does he have to say about this letter?”
My smile turned to a frown. “I haven’t talked to him about it yet. I think I will later today.”
“Okay. Well I’m going to get up and start on breakfast for the boys before their soccer practice.”
I grimaced. She was going to be a nervous wreck until I decided to go home. “Okay. Bye Aunt Caroline.”
“Goodbye dear.”
I ended the call and stared out the window. How long was I going to stay in Indiana? I really needed to talk to Hunter and fill him in on everything that had happened. This had quickly become a situation we needed to work through together. Where the hell was he?
I was a little worried about our relationship. We’d confessed our love for each other on Friday, and I knew I still felt that way about him. Hopefully his feelings hadn’t changed either. Still, not being able to get in touch with him when I really needed to made me uneasy. Could I count on him to be my anchor through thick and thin?
I bit my lip, suddenly feeling more uncertain than ever. It upset me that a rough patch had come so early in our relationship, but it had, and he wasn’t off to a good start in helping me through it. He hadn’t answered my texts for days. What would make you ignore someone you love for days? Could anything? Did he really love me?