I’d tied up the wildflowers with a pretty ribbon and took them with me to Brock’s grave. There, I removed the wilted bouquet that Helena had set there the week before and replaced it with my fresh bundle.
I passed an hour in quiet contemplation before speaking out loud. Sometimes I did this—and not just when I was at his graveside. If anyone ever overheard me, they’d think I was insane for talking to my dead boyfriend. But I liked to think that, wherever he was, he could hear me. That he could still feel our connection the way I felt it. That he’d know that I missed him.
Indulging myself in self-pity, I cursed what a rotten fate it was to find your soulmate at a young age and then have your time together cut tragically short. I lamented having to live an entire lifetime with him only as a memory, and I mourned the fact that the closest I could get to Brock was a plaque in a green lawn where I lay flowers every so often.
My thoughts drifted to last night, when I did a Tarot reading for myself. I’d wanted to confirm that I was making the right decision by leaving to travel with the Faire at the end of June.
I drew the Fool. How appropriate. How me.
Not because I was foolish, but because of what the Fool represented—a wanderer, an adventurer. A person who listened to the wind and did not set down roots in any one place.
The card showed a man with his possessions in a bag over his shoulder, looking up toward the radiant sun. He was stepping precariously near the edge of a cliff, a happy dog clipping at his heels. Ready to start a brand new adventure.
I felt that also and tried to ignore any of the other pangs at the back of my mind—the thought of leaving Alex, my other friends. And for some reason, William and his surprising lips had popped up, too, before I’d forced the memory of our kiss from my mind.
But as I drove home, my mind kept returning to it—the feel of William’s hands in my hair as they pressed against the back of my head, the way my body had heated instantly from the contact. I couldn’t not think about it.
With a sigh of frustration, I turned on one of my favorite mythology podcasts to listen to on the way home.
A few hours later, I sat at the dining room table pouring over my daily calendar, making a to-do list for the week and checking my appointments. Despite my hesitation to get too close to William, I was determined to get that tiara back. Thus, I was figuring out when I could sandwich in more time to help him with his crowd problems. If I’d been highly motivated to get it back before, I was even more determined now that Helena had made a flight to Serbia possible.
Alex sank down in a chair opposite me and plopped a foil container of food in front of my face. The delicious aroma of Lupe’s enchiladas swirled around my nose.
“Lunchtime. Eat up, girlfriend. I invited some of the gang tonight and we’re watchin’ Doctor Who and drinkin’ tequila.”
In spite of the siren’s song—otherwise known as Alex’s mom’s wonderful food—I glanced over my daily agenda again. 7 p.m. – William: visualization & breathing practice.
“I’m supposed to have William over this evening.”
Her eyebrows rose. “Fun. He’ll know everyone. Heath, Kat, Mia and Adam, and some of their work friends are coming over, too.”
I forked a bite straight from the tin—meaty, cheesy goodness exploded on my tongue and my stomach rumbled for more. “So that’s why you were cleaning like a madwoman when I got home. Again. I thought you’d lost your mind.”
Alex grinned and pointed to her forehead. “Loco como un zorro.”
“Crazy like Zorro?”
“Like a fox. And we both know I’m a fox.”
I leered at her, taking in her smooth, bronze skin, her big, dark eyes and high cheekbones. She had a rebel stripe of pink running through her almost-black hair. Her oh-so-traditional mom had chewed her out for it, but I’d talked Alex into standing her ground and keeping it. “You are. If I swung that way, you’d be in trouble.”
She stuck her tongue out at me. “So what’s up with William? Are you dating him now? I bet the girls in the clan are pissed.”
I laughed. “No. No, we’re not dating.” Just trading explosive kisses on the doorstep. My face flushed, remembering the way our tongues tangled. Damn. The dude knew how to kiss. What was it they said about the quiet ones? Still waters run deep…
“Hmm. First you drop in at his house, then a Ducks game last week. Drinking party tonight…”
“I had no idea you were planning that. We’re supposed to work on visualization and breathing tonight.”
She perked up with a sly smile. “Heavy breathing?”
I rolled my eyes. “Calm your libido, please.”
She looked at me skeptically. “You don’t think he’s cute? Especially since he’s been working out so much…”
“No, I don’t think he’s cute,” I replied, keeping the rest of my thoughts to myself. William wasn’t merely “cute,” he was hot.
And he kissed like Eros himself. Those hands…the way they’d sifted through my hair. I swallowed and looked away.
He wasn’t right for me. Or more accurately, I wasn’t right for him.
I couldn’t be right for him. I was leaving in just three months, and my intuition told me that, if I allowed it, my involvement with William would last longer than that.
We were merely working toward a common cause. We couldn’t muddle it with anything else…fantastic kisses or not.
“You know what that tiara means to me.” I kept my voice low to keep it from shaking with emotion. “He has to win the duel so he can get it back, and I need to help him.”
“But kissing should be involved.” She nodded enthusiastically and my face burned even hotter. I faked coughing into my hand, as if the food was too spicy for me. As it turned out, Alex wasn’t paying that close of attention. “I’d date him if he was into me.”
“So would half of the RMRA—the female half, anyway.”
“True. But he’s into someone else.” She smirked at me.
I scoffed at her. “We’re just friends.”
“Friends can have benefits. You’ve done friends with benefits before.”
I shrugged. “I’m leaving in a few months.”
Her face darkened. “Yeah, I know. Time for you to move on like your gypsy ancestors.”