“What are you hoping to do with that?” I enquired. He laughed between bites of his sub.
“You sound just like my mum and the careers advisor.”
“Sorry,” I blushed. “I’m just never really sure what employment people without vocational degrees want to go into. I didn’t mean to be rude.”
“I know you didn’t. I’m just teasing. Truth is, I’m not really sure either. I like playing rugby, and I enjoy history, so that’s what I decided to study. I’m hoping that a career choice will become clear before I graduate, but in the meantime, I just want to see how the rugby pans out.”
It amazed me that someone could be so nonchalant about their future career. It didn’t mean he was spoilt, but that kind of indifference could only come from someone who’d never gone hungry because they couldn’t find the money for a meal. Once I graduated, I needed to find a decently paid job as soon as I could to get back on my feet. It just went to show how poles apart I was from these people. A few more trays landed as I picked at my meal, but I lost the thread of everyone’s conversations quickly, not having been to any of the parties and not knowing any of the people they were talking about. I was ashamed to say that I started to panic. I understood isolation, but now the void was being filled so quickly, and I felt like I was freaking out. When I’d decided to start making friends, I had no idea that it would happen so quickly. The domino effect of one introduction leading to another left me suddenly immersed in Nikki’s social circle. It was like jumping into the deep end of the pool when you’d planned to wade in slowly. My problem was that, regardless of how I’d landed in the middle, I had no idea how to swim. Figuring that since I’d held up one end of a short conversation without embarrassing myself, now was as good a time as any to cut my losses before I had a total meltdown. Loading up my tray, I made a dipshit excuse to Nikki about needing to speak with one of my tutors. With a wave to my new acquaintances, I left. As I turned to go, I saw Nikki elbow Ryan swiftly in the ribs and mutter, “Well done, arsehole. You’ve scared her away.”
She had no idea how on the money she actually was.
MY SECOND NIGHT AT THE GYM wasn’t nearly as traumatic as I’d built it up to be. The first day in a new job had to be the worst, but today I knew exactly where to go and what to do. I was proud of myself that I didn’t so much as hesitate when I pulled open the door to Driscoll’s. It was worth having to deal with a few thousand pounds of sweaty boys to be working with numbers. Somehow, it seemed easier to think of them as boys rather than men, and though all of them were pretty cut, most didn’t look that much older than me. I was relieved that no one really stared as I walked through. With a bit of luck, I’d be part of the furniture after a couple of weeks. Unconsciously, I searched out O’Connell, only to find him dancing around the ring, sparring with another fighter. As soon as I caught sight of him, a shiver ran though me that left me with goose bumps. It amazed me that for someone so big, he could be so light on his feet. He bounced around on the canvas like it was a trampoline, and he was full of limitless energy. As quick as he was, his direction change was so fast it must have been instinctive. Although I didn’t think I could stomach seeing him land a punch or take a hit, I had to admit he was pretty fucking beautiful to watch. Adjusting my backpack before I was caught staring, I made my way to the office. O’Connell had finished his round, and I felt his eyes follow me.
I expected the office to be uncomfortably chilly, but as I walked into the room, I found it was as warm as the gym.
“You’re back then, sunshine,” Danny barked. With a cigarette half burned down and hanging out of his mouth, he shuffled around pouring himself coffee.
“Did you think I’d quit?” I enquired, quietly.
“Well, I had my doubts. You’re a tough little nut, but I didn’t think you’d figured that out yet.”
I chuckled at his positive opinion of my good character and wondered how he could come to that conclusion, given how little he knew about me.
“Well, I’m back now, so before I get spooked again, how about you put me to work and get your money’s worth?”
“Well, well.” He laughed, with a throaty chuckle that gave away a lifetime addiction to tobacco.
“A couple of weeks ago you were afraid of your own shadow, and now you’re giving me cheek. Well, you’d best straighten up that backbone, missy, ‘cause the boys will be coming to see you soon to pay their dues. Petty cash box is in the top drawer. They’ll give you their names, and the amount they owe is in the green ledger. You’ll just need to enter the amount they pay. End of the night, you give me the names of those who didn’t pay, and I’ll get to work.”
“You hound the boys for their subs?” I asked, horrified at the thought of my tiny, frail-looking friend confronting mean-looking fighters who were trained to hurt and who looked pumped up enough to do just that. Danny cackled at the look of horror on my face.
“Sunshine, most of these boys had been men long before they walked through my door and don’t you be worrying about me. If any of ‘em are stupid enough to miss subs without talking to me ‘bout it first, then they get what’s coming to ‘em. Besides, this lot are more scared of me than I am of them.”
When I thought about it, it really wasn’t too hard to believe. He terrified me when we first met, and it wasn’t a stretch to see him mouthing off to one of his fighters. Feeling brave, I pointed to the coffee.
“May I have some, please?” I asked. Apparently, this amused Danny because he chuckled again.
“What’s so funny?” I enquired, slightly confused.
“Just getting used to good manners again, Em. Don’t worry about it. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen or used ‘em, that’s all.”
He poured me a large cup of coffee and motioned to a heater that hadn’t been there yesterday.
“It was feckin’ freezing in here earlier, so I got the lads to bring a heater in. You keep that going ‘til you leave.”
“Thanks, Danny,” I answered, sipping my coffee.
“No thanks needed. You get sick from sitting in a freezing office then you can’t work,” he muttered at me, cigarette still hanging precariously from his mouth.
It was on the tip of my tongue to say that he was all heart, but despite all his whining to the contrary, I truly believed he was. I thought about how nights spent constantly on my feet for minimum wage had been swapped for nights spent in a warm office, with a comfy chair and a cup of good coffee, doing something that I loved. My half smile became a full-blown grin. Danny just rolled his eyes at me with an indecipherable noise. He carried his coffee and shuffled out of the office, shutting the door behind him. Shrugging off my jacket, I hung it on the back of my chair and set to work. Yesterday, the office was Danny’s. Today, I was making it mine. Pre-armed with cleaning products from home, I cleared the desk of papers then scrubbed it until it gleamed. It might have been old, but by the time I finished, the pattern of mug stains, a legacy from yesterday’s dusting, had all but gone. Only those stains literally burned into the wood remained. When the smell of lemon and beeswax finally overpowered the smell of nicotine, I got back to the real work. Booting up the PC took almost as long as cleaning the desk had, but I got there in the end. Pulling up the programme I’d set up yesterday, I reached for a stack of invoices and got to work.