“Why are you doing this?” I found myself whispering, feeling younger and more lost than I could ever remember feeling. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that there was more to this offer than met the eye. He would be getting something other than a little fun out of it if I agreed. I just had no idea what.
“It’s all a question of what Ethan’s freedom is worth to you,” he said instead of answering my question. “Virginity doesn’t mean as much to the women of today as it did to women of old. Giving it to me would not harm your chances of finding a husband, nor would it cause you to be shunned or otherwise treated as damaged goods. Is it a fate so terrible that it is worth sacrificing the rest of Ethan’s immortal life to avoid it?”
The tears were back, and this time I wasn’t able to stop them from spilling over. I felt trapped, and helpless, and guilty all at the same time. There were plenty of girls my age who’d been having sex for years and thought nothing of it. And yet here I was, scared to agree to the Erlking’s terms even when Ethan’s entire future lay in the balance.
The Erlking reached out and took both my hands. I made a half-hearted attempt to pull away, but as I expected, he didn’t let go. His thumbs stroked over the backs of my hands, his touch surprisingly gentle.
“You’re frightened now because you aren’t ready,” he said. “That’s why I’m leaving it to you to choose the time.” He let go of one of my hands, reaching up to stroke a tear off of my cheek. “When you’re a little older and have had time to accustom yourself to the idea, you might find the prospect of coming to my bed more appealing than you might expect.”
He was smiling at me again, and despite my distress, I couldn’t help noticing the beauty of his deep blue eyes with their frame of long lashes. Yeah, there were probably plenty of girls who’d fall over backward at the chance of getting into his bed. Too bad I wasn’t one of them.
“And if you find I’m wrong,” he continued, “if you find you cannot bear to let me take you, then that choice will always be yours.”
Yeah, if I never wanted to have sex for my entire life! Maybe I wasn’t ready right now, and maybe I was a bit on the prudish side, but that didn’t mean I wanted to stay a virgin forever.
But how could I say no and just abandon Ethan? How could I face Kimber again, knowing I could have saved her brother but was too much of a chicken to do it? And how could I live with myself, knowing that Ethan was taken because of me, and I wouldn’t lift a finger to help him?
I felt like a marionette, dangling on the Erlking’s strings. I knew there was something more to this deal than he was telling me. And I knew that someday I would have to face the consequences of my decision. If the Erlking had demanded I have sex with him right now, I might not have been able to summon the necessary courage, no matter how horrible I would have felt about it. But maybe he was right. Maybe in a couple of years, it wouldn’t seem like such a big deal.
“Throw in Connor, and you have a deal,” I said, even as my insides cringed at what I was promising.
The Erlking looked surprised, like it had never occurred to him I might want to free my brother, too. He let go of my hand, then leaned back in his chair, brow creased in thought. Then he nodded.
“I will release Ethan immediately upon your pledge,” he said. “Then when that pledge is fulfilled, I will release Connor as well.”
I couldn’t find my voice to agree out loud, so I just nodded instead. I was pretty sure I was going to hugely regret this one day, probably very soon.
The Erlking stood, holding out his hands to me. “Then let us seal the bargain.”
I didn’t know what he wanted. I stood, but I didn’t give him my hands, instead watching him warily.
“We’ll seal the bargain with a kiss,” he told me, brushing a strand of my hair away from my face. I started to protest, but he spoke right over me. “The bargain will be enforced by magic, so that neither one of us may break it. You will feel the magic building, but don’t be alarmed.”
I shook my head. “I am not kissing you!” I said.
He raised one shoulder in a shrug. “We could seal the deal with blood, but a kiss will be much more pleasant. For both of us. Besides, how am I to believe you will ever fulfill the bargain if you aren’t willing to part with a single kiss?”
I swallowed hard and tried to tell myself I was being a sissy. A kiss was nothing to be afraid of, even when the one delivering it was a cold-blooded killer. I didn’t say anything, and the Erlking took that as agreement.
“You will feel the magic beginning to gather as soon as I speak the terms of our agreement,” he said. “It will intensify when I kiss you, but it won’t hurt you. It will also make the kiss … quite pleasurable.”
I suppressed a shudder. I didn’t want to enjoy it. “I don’t want you screwing with my head.”
“I won’t. It’s merely a side effect of the magic. If we sealed the deal with blood, it would intensify the pain instead, so you see why I prefer the kiss.” He grinned at me, an almost boyish expression that looked all wrong for his face.
I could tell from the heat in my cheeks that I was blushing again, and I hated it. “Fine. Whatever.” If the magic was only going to intensify what was already there, then I’d just have to make damn sure I didn’t let myself take any pleasure from the Erlking’s kiss.
He bowed his head graciously, amused by my surly answer. “Then I vow that if you will pledge to me your virginity, I will release Ethan from the Wild Hunt this very day and release Connor on the day you fulfill your pledge.”