Dirty - Page 43/99

“Done.” I smiled.

Rosie shoved the box of tissues at her, then ran off to the kitchen to grab another bottle of wine. This night was going to get messy. Everyone needed to cut loose now and then.

I couldn’t help but wonder if this was the only end result of love. Feeling lost, hurting, clinging onto what was left of your life? Thank goodness I hadn’t gone through with the wedding. And thank god this thing with Vaughan had an end date. Otherwise, who knew what might happen. I could wind up broken, left in an even worse state than after Chris’s betrayal. Because Vaughan could do that. Forty-eight hours in, and already he stirred up feelings I didn’t want to mention. We were a train wreck waiting to happen. But, damn, it’d be hard to avoid going down that track. Even if I’d regret it for the rest of my life.

“Considering we work in the same building, Pat’s gotten amazingly good at sticking close to the tattoo parlor and avoiding me,” she said. “I haven’t seen him in weeks. I think that’s what caused our split.”

We kept quiet, letting her spill. Sometimes, that’s just what a girl needs.

“When he took over the parlor it was shit. A total mess. He worked his ass off to get it to where it is today and I supported him. I thought when we opened the bar that it was my turn, my thing. I figured he’d understand. But it didn’t work that way.” She held out her glass and Rosie filled it up again. “We were hardly ever seeing each other and we just … we drifted. One day he got up and said, I don’t know why we’re even bothering. What can you say to that? How the fuck are you supposed to react? It was like every bit of emotion had drained right out of him. His body was there, but his head and his heart were on another planet.”

Her mouth opened, but for a moment nothing came out. Nell looked ruined. Christ, if this was marriage, if this was trusting another person body and soul, it scared the living shit out of me.

Suddenly, her chin lifted, her shoulders squared. “Like I’m supposed to smack him around the head with our marriage certificate? I told him if he didn’t want to be there then he should go. I wasn’t going to stop him. Fuck, I didn’t think he’d actually leave.”

Outside there was shouting, laughter. It seemed so out of place. Wrong. But I guess life went on, even when it shouldn’t.

Nell flipped her hair back, licked her shining lips. “Anyway…”

“I’m sorry,” I said, not that it helped.

She turned her splotchy red face my way, tears trailing down her cheeks. “Can’t you just accidentally get pregnant and make Vaughan stay in Coeur d’Alene? I want some family around.”

“Um, no. Sorry.”

She barked that signature laugh. “Fine. Ruin everything, Lydia. See if I care.”

“Gosh, Lydia,” chided Rosie with a smile. “She’s not asking for much.”

I laughed and drank more wine. Everything would make more sense inebriated. I just knew it. And boy, was it going straight to my head. I guess having eaten only a piece of pecan pie today wasn’t the best way to start a night of wine drinking.

“I’m not being funny.”

“I know,” I said. “I’m a selfish ho.”

“Yes. You are.” Nell blew her nose and refilled her glass, attempting to pull herself together under our watchful eyes. “You should just let me do what I want with your uterus.”

The woman was nuts. Children weren’t even on my radar yet. Let alone with Vaughan.

“Your brother and I are just friends, Nell,” I said.

Both women laughed so hard it was a wonder they didn’t fall off the couch. I stoically ignored them as best I could. Female friends, so overrated. Though also kind of wonderful in all the ways. Damn Coeur d’Alene for getting so great just as I was about to leave.

“A toast!” Rosie held her wine glass high. “To bullshit and broken hearts.”

“Ha. Nice one.” I grinned.

“Here, here,” said Nell, drinking deep.

“To bullshit and broken hearts,” I said. Then I drank too.

Hours later someone knocked on the door. Hours and hours and many bottles of wine and slices of pizza later. Nell slowly got to her feet and stumbled on over to answer it. I’ll admit, it kind of surprised me when the person didn’t just charge inside the same way everyone else did.

“Oh. It’s you.” Nell turned around and returned to the couch.

Behind her was Eric, his anger from last night missing. Well, mostly. His lips were pressed tight together, but his eyes were completely devoid of the fire and rage. “You’ve made your point.”