I shrugged. I knew Rosethorn, and she didn’t.
Nory shook her head. “Meryem! Where is that girl? Look at this!” Nory crouched and began to pick chickpeas out of the dirt. “It’s not like we can afford to waste food!” She put them in the bowl that Meryem had dropped. “Evvy, make yourself useful here. Jayat, why don’t you—”
“I’ll go check the pot,” Jayat said quickly. “All we need is for it to burn.” He vanished inside the kitchen.
“Why are you so sharp with him?” I crouched beside Nory and started to gather peas. “He came to look after you two. He could have been safely away.”
“I didn’t ask him to come,” Nory said, her voice clipped. “Now he’s stuck. Maybe living with me for a few months will teach him that he doesn’t want to marry me after all.”
“You think the others will come home by then?”
“They always do,” replied Nory. “Pirates, earthquakes, big storms…they always return once the people on the other islands start to get on their nerves. We’re proud folk here on Starns. We prefer to do for ourselves. Keep gathering those.” She got up and went into the house, her eyes sharp. Inside, I heard her scold Jayat. I did as I was told, thinking.
It was good to hear her, and good to hear Jayat as he argued with her about something. Staying here for a while wouldn’t be so bad. Hard work would keep my mind off how little magic I had. I could be useful. Rounding up animals and getting them fed, collecting food…More people would come once they felt safer. They would need to eat. I could help with the cooking, too.
As my power came back, I could summon the big rocks from under the fields. They could turn the ground over so the ash would get mixed in with fresh dirt. And maybe I could clear the rockfalls on the road to the sea.
Sooner or later, though, Rosethorn and Luvo would come for me. We’d go home, to Winding Circle and a different life. I’d need a new direction then. It was as clear as the plink of the dried peas as they struck the bowl.
I’d lived two ways. I’d been one with Luvo, the islands, Flare, Carnelian, and the volcano spirits. All that fire and glory was splendid, but…It was nothing like the hot rush of feeling that swamped me when I saw that Meryem, Nory, and Jayat were alive. Being a creature of melting stone was powerful. It was as powerful as the earthquakes. Being with these meat creatures again was as warm and complete as my own blood.
I was a meat creature who had come close to being a monster. I had almost surrendered being human without knowing what I was giving up. Maybe only Rosethorn, Luvo, and Myrrhtide would know I had helped to save lives and this island. That made me feel good. Useful. As if I had earned my place among my fellow meat creatures.
I liked that feeling. I wanted to earn more of it. I could start here, with the fields, and the roads. In the end, though, I would have to take Rosethorn’s path. Battling Carnelian and Flare had worked because I’d had Luvo, and because I’d been lucky. Left to myself, finding the way on my own, I might put my feet wrong, like I did with Meryem. Being useful doesn’t come naturally to me. I’d have to study it, like Rosethorn did. Winding Circle could teach me to help on purpose. They could teach me to do it because I’d planned to do it all along.
So I’d go back. I’d tell them it was time for me to learn. I’d put on the white robe, and thank the gods of the Earth for letting me wake up in time.
“Here.” Meryem poked me in the shoulder. “I came back so I could give you this.” She handed me a chunk of amethyst the size of her fist. “To make up for the one me’n Treak broke.”
“Nothing would make up for you dying. No stone is worth a person’s life.” Mostly I even believed that. I meant it about her life, anyway. Some people aren’t worth a grain of sand on the beach.
I suppose Winding Circle will teach me not to think that way. Maybe it will be an improvement.
“Do you like it?” Meryem looked really worried.
“It’s beautiful. I’m keeping it always. It’ll make me think of you.” I meant that completely. “Come on. You can help me bring in my mules. I have more dried chickpeas in my saddlebags.”
Meryem ran across the yard and grabbed a cat. She carried her back to me. “This is Squeak. She had kittens in Azaze’s room. Nory says I can have one. Do you want one?”
I swallowed a lump in my throat. Maybe it was time to have a cat, too. The temples novices are allowed to have pets. Lark says it makes them more responsible. I think it makes them less annoying. “Maybe.” I had to clear my throat and say it twice, because it came out a little funny the first time. “Maybe. Mules first. Kittens later.”
Meryem ran ahead of me, skipping. Her feet kicked up puffs of ash and dust. At least this part of my being a better meat creature was off to a good start.