I burst out of the front doors and into the absolute chill of the night. The front of building was deserted; only a taxi cab and a lone car were slowly cruising down the street. The snow was now at least two inches high and falling steadily. It was cold as hell but, for the moment, my drunk skin didn’t feel it.
I looked around, up and down the streets that branched off. I didn’t see anyone at all. It was like all of Seattle had shut down due to the miniscule amounts of white stuff.
A movement out of the corner of my eye made me turn to my left. At the corner of the brick building, a lone puff of smoke emerged.
I walked carefully, trying not to slip on the wet, icy ground beneath me, and poked my head around the corner.
Dex was there, leaning against the wall, watching the empty street in front of him and smoking a cigarette.
“Dex?” I said gently, afraid to startle him.
He looked over at me and gave me a quick, sheepish smile after he noticed me looking at the cigarette in his hand. “Sorry,” he mumbled, taking another drag. “I had to. I bummed it off a…bum.”
I gingerly made my way over to him, keeping one hand on the brick wall for support, and stopped right up next to him. I peered at his face, looking for signs of pain.
He glanced at me quickly, frowned and looked away. “What is it?”
“Are you OK?” I asked. I placed my hand on the crook of his elbow.
He looked down at my hand, bit his lip for a few seconds, then let out a large exhalation of smoke that floated up into the falling snowflakes. They had started to gather in his hair.
I waited patiently for his answer, even though I knew he wasn’t OK. I tightened my grip around his arm, trying not to feel the snow that was gathering on my bare shoulders and legs.
“Where did Jenn and Bradley go?” I asked quietly.
He shrugged. “To fuck somewhere, I’m sure.”
“I’m sorry,” I said.
He smiled at me. There was sadness on his brow but an odd little twinkle in his eye. It was a strange combination.
“I’m sorry too,” he said. “Hope you realize I really need this smoke.”
“I wouldn’t blame you if you started sticking it straight into your veins.”
“Now that’s a good idea,” he said. He smiled but it quickly faded and he stared down at his dress shoes as they stood out against the white snow. He eyed me quickly. “You must be freezing.”
“I’m not,” I said, hoping my teeth wouldn’t start chattering on cue.
He rolled his eyes and smirked. He stuck the cigarette in his mouth, hanging it loosely from his lips, took off his suit jacket and placed it around my shoulders. He pulled me in closer to him at the same time. I instinctively put my nose to the collar and breathed in.
“You’re smelling it,” he observed, sounding amused.
“I like the smell of you,” I admitted shyly. I felt like we were rounding some home stretch and the finish line was in sight. It didn’t matter anymore what I said. I was sending my pride and ego packing.
He swallowed hard and took in another drag of his smoke, not breaking our eye contact. “Is that all you like about me?”
I took in a deep breath and said, “I just…like you. I like everything about you.”
And with that, I could almost hear dramatic drumming in my head, the swirls of disorienting guitar, like the turbulent ending of “Something.” I could feel it pulsing through my veins, I could feel it in the snow-filled air around us, I could feel it vibrating off of both our bodies, like we were both attached to some electrical source, some furnace, and the switches were all being flipped on. The air in my lungs was becoming heavier and catching on the way out.
Dex came off of the wall and turned toward me. The energy between us intensified. He took the cigarette and flicked it out onto the road just as another cab cruised by, slowing down slightly as it drove past us. I paid no attention. The only thing I saw was Dex’s face and his eyes as they gazed down at me more rapturously than before.
He took his hand and gently brushed the snow off my hair, tucking stray pieces between my ears. He let his hand drift down to the edge of my jaw and held it there, a surge of heat against the cold.
“You’ve always been there for me, Perry,” he said with what sounded like velvet rocks in his voice. “Even from the very beginning, even if you never meant to be, even when you shouldn’t have been. You’re the light in all this madness. You’re my light. I should have been with you...” The thought hit him as his face crumpled in amazement. “Oh God, why am I not with you?”
“Because you’re an idiot,” I said.
And then I kissed him.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
I don’t know what possessed me. I’d later play victim to ending the tension, for having to do the inevitable. For what had to happen. What I had wanted to happen for quite a long time.
But whatever the reason, I leaned into Dex. I grabbed the sides of his head with both of my hands, his hair slightly slippery from the snow and hair gel, and I pulled his face down to mine. I placed my lips flush on his and kissed him sweetly at first, not caring if he returned the favor. Then, when his lips parted slightly, I teased the inside of them lightly with my tongue. He let out a breath of hot air, maybe from surprise, and I pulled back. I kept my hands on his head and tried to catch my own breath before I got carried away.
We looked at each other, both of us a bit in shock, him more than I. There was only a split-second pause before Dex grunted, “Oh, fuck it.”