“Why is that so hush-hush? Don’t you go on tour all the time?”
He sighed again and I almost punched him, because he removed those questing fingers entirely. I snapped to attention when I saw that we were parked in front of the house. I was twisting around to help Cora out of the car, when she literally barreled over the back of the seat and scrambled across me to get out the door.
“I have to pee right now!”
She bolted for the front door so fast no one would have ever known she was close to comatose a second ago. I laughed and was going to follow her into the house, but Jet reached across me and pulled the door back closed. He turned the car off so that the radio went silent, and it was just me and him in the quiet cocoon of the front seat of his car.
“I’m going to Europe. We’re going with Artifice, so it’s kind of a big deal. I’ve never been gone for that long of a stretch before, or gone that far, because I was always so worried about what would happen to my mom. Now I have other reasons for being all torn up over it.”
“Because you’re worried that he might hit her again?”
“Come on, Ayd, you know that isn’t what I’m talking about.”
His dark eyes were even darker in the silence around us.
“Every day, I’m waiting for you to tell me it was fun, but you have better shit to do. I don’t even want to tell you what goes through my head when I think about telling you that I’m going to be on the road for three months.”
I bit down hard on my bottom lip. I braced one hand on his shoulder, and used that and the steering wheel to lever myself over him, so that I was straddling him in the driver’s seat. I put my hands on either side of his face and leaned down to kiss him. I didn’t want him to worry about me, about where my head would be, while he was gone. I wanted him to go on tour and do what he loved for once, just for himself, with none of his baggage. I slicked my tongue across his, played with the barbell in the center of it and let my teeth nip and bite at his bottom lip. I kissed him like he always kissed me, like he was the last guy on earth I would ever put my mouth on.
I ran my hands down his shoulders and looked him straight in the eye. “Are you going to sing angry anti–love songs to anyone else while you’re gone?”
He coughed out a laugh and moved his hands so that they were on my ass, where my skirt had risen up to an indecent level.
“No.”
“Are you going to find someone else to sing sappy old country songs to before bed?”
He stiffened because I had managed to get my hands between our bodies where we were pressed together so tightly and to snag the buckle on his belt. I wasn’t so sure about having enough room to maneuver with those tight-ass pants of his, but I was more than willing to give it the old college try.
“No, Ayd. I only have ever wanted to do that for you.”
He fell, hot and heavy into my hands and he must have been ready to move the show on the road, because I heard the sound of ripping fabric and felt the chilly night air hit bare skin where my lacy underwear no longer covered my backside.
“Then stop worrying about everyone but yourself. I’ll be here when you get back and maybe by then I’ll be ready to have this conversation you’re clearly itching to have. Moment by moment, remember?”
He groaned when I leaned down to kiss him again. I was tired of talking, tired of thinking. I just wanted to get him inside me and I didn’t care that we were outside in his car, when there were two perfectly good beds less than a hundred yards away. I had a much harder time ignoring Bad Ayden when he was all hot and bothered and throbbing so deliciously between my legs. The run-in with Silas and everything building with Asa had her close to prying off the lid of the box I’d so ruthlessly shoved her in.
“We need to have some kind of conversation before then, Ayden, and you know it.”
He was right where I wanted him, the tip and that cold ring all against the wet and needy parts of me. I was ready to slide down, to engulf him and disappear in the sensation only he could provide, when his long fingers suddenly dug painfully into the globe of each ass cheek. I lifted my head to look down at him, needy and frustrated that he was being difficult. The sexual buzz he offered was way more intoxicating than an entire bottle of Patrón, and he was about to get hollered at if he didn’t give me what I wanted like he did yesterday.
“Jet, seriously, this can wait until later.”
I tried to wiggle free, tried to sink down and seat myself on him, but he had too tight a hold on me and I was stuck between his hard hands and the steering wheel.
“We can’t do this here, Ayd. I don’t have anything on me.”
Well, that sucked. I was ready, beyond ready, and I could feel that he was, too. I kissed him again and Bad Ayden out of the box, I was just so tired of trying to keep it closed.
“Don’t care.”
And I didn’t, at least I didn’t right then. Tomorrow, I undoubtedly would. Hell, in five minutes I would probably be in a full-blown panic, but right then, I just wanted him. It had nothing to do with the tequila swirling around in my blood. It was enough that he cared, that he was worried enough about me to put the brakes on when I could feel how hard he was, and feel that he was as close to the precipice as I was.
He was still trying to hold me off him, but it was futile. I was too buzzed and he was too hard, and there was just something a little crazy and a whole lot sexy about hooking up in the front seat of his car. There was no way we could hold out for much longer.
When I felt that cold press of metal, unfettered for once without the covering of latex, I nearly passed out. My eyes fluttered and I thought I heard him swear, or maybe he told me he loved me. Either way, it was lost in the sensations that were burning up my spine and making me pant against his throat. His hands were rough enough that I was going to have bruises, and I was so glad I’d had to foresight to put on a skirt that I wanted to give myself a high five, until he pushed me up and hauled me back down, and I couldn’t even remember what day it was anymore.
I said his name over and over again because it was the only thing that made any sense to me at the moment, and I heard him growl something dirty and incoherent. I was going to lose it, going to shatter all over the place and take him with me, when he suddenly shifted under me and I felt him pull out. I was too far gone, too close to the finish line for it to matter. I shivered and quaked, broke apart all over him and heard him groan and whisper my name. When I was able to pry my eyes back open and catch my breath, all I could do was look at him with huge eyes. He kissed me on the cheek and moved around to get us back in some semblance of order. He was still hard, still pressing against me like a steel rod, and I didn’t miss that he looked like he had swallowed something sour.
I grabbed his jaw with one unsteady hand and forced him to look at me. His muscles clenched and unclenched, and those dark eyes with their unholy halo did a better job of stripping me bare than anything he had ever used on me before.
“Why did you do that?” My voice was husky and sounded totally sexed-up even to my own ears.
He put his hands on my waist, and shifted me off him just enough so that I wasn’t smashing that impressive erection between the two of us anymore. He let his head flop back against the seat and narrowed his eyes at me.
“I’m not going to let you use me to make bad decisions that give you an excuse to walk away from me, Ayd. When you go, it’s going to have to be for a real reason, and not just because you can lose control with me when we hook up and it scares the holy hell out of you.”
I didn’t know what to say to that, because even through the lovely buzz I still had working, I knew he was right. In the harsh light of day, unprotected sex in the front seat of a cool car was exactly the kind of thing that would send me running from him as fast as I could. That was exactly the kind of thing I liked to think I had left well behind me. I was looking for a way to get some space between him and the new me, and the best way to do that was to let the old me finally have her wicked way with him.
I let him collect me in a hug that had the best parts of us lined back up. I didn’t know what I was going to do with him in the long run. I had a sinking feeling that I was going to end up breaking his heart and mine right along with it. Right now, all I wanted to do was take care of him as well as he always took care of me.
“Take me inside, Jet.” I didn’t have to ask him twice.
Chapter 12
I knew something was off before I even opened my eyes the next morning. Normally, there were endless legs tangled with mine and a cloud of feather-soft black hair all in my face and spread across my chest. Not this morning. She was curled on her side, facing away from me. Her hands were folded under her cheek and she had makeup smudged under her still-closed eyes.
It almost looked like at some point in the night she had been crying.
Granted she was bound to be hungover after the tankard of tequila she had drunk, and I hadn’t been very gentle with her last night. But there was something else, something working that I couldn’t see, but sure as hell could feel. That was the only way I had been able to stop in the car last night. It felt like there was someone standing physically between us that I couldn’t reach around to get to her. It almost killed me; it had made my dick swear an unpleasant and ugly revenge on me, but I had known on some soul-deep level that all she needed was an excuse like that, a simple slip for a reason to walk away.
I was going to wake her up, kiss her bare shoulder and maybe some more interesting parts that the scarlet comforter covered, when my phone went off in an angry blast and the wailing strains of Mastodon filled the room. I scrambled to answer it before it woke Ayden, but it was too late. She moaned and grabbed her head, like that would help. By the time I answered, she had pulled the covers all the way over her face and was swearing at me in a way that would make all my boys proud.
I chuckled a little and tapped the round curve of her ass under the heavy blanket. It wasn’t like Von to call before noon, but the entire band was running at full speed to get our act together for the tour.
“What up?”
There was a lot of noise in the background, the clash of angry voices, and the wail of sirens combined with my guitar player’s panicked voice. A cold chill raced down my spine.
“Dude, you have to get down to the studio. Now.”
I was already on my feet and searching the floor for a pair of pants.
“What’s going on?”
I didn’t see Ayden poke her head out of the covers, but I could feel her bright eyes watching me as I scrambled into a T-shirt and my boots.
“Someone broke in. Everything is gone.”
I blinked because that didn’t make any sense. “What do you mean?” I probably sounded like an idiot but my head was spinning in a million different directions. All I could think was, if my old man was involved, no court on earth was going to stop me from killing him for real this time.
Ayden swung her long legs off the bed and I distractedly watched as she got back into her clothes from the night before. Only this time, she put on my long-sleeved shirt with the cow skull on it. I shouldn’t have been able to process that she looked superhot, but it was her, so I totally did.