Surprised, I look up. “Differently, how?”
He glances down at his hands, and when he speaks, the heartfelt tone in his voice almost breaks me. “To start with, I’d tell you that I love you and that nothing matters to me but you. But I’m afraid. Terrified. God, Tru, the second you told me you were pregnant, my own childhood flashed before my eyes.” He breathes in deeply. “That’s why I ran: because of my own fears, not because I don’t want you or the baby.”
He wants the baby?
“What are you terrified of?” I ask quietly.
“That I’m not good enough to be a dad. That I’ll screw it up. That I’ll fuck everything up. That I’ll turn our child into a fucked-up mess like I am. Just like my dad did to me.”
I’m just about to speak, to protest, to tell him he’s not a fuck-up, that he’s not Paul, he never could be, when he speaks again.
“But while I sat there thinking about all the negatives, I realised something.”
“Which was?” I’m all but on the edge of my seat.
“That I have you,” he says simply. “With you I know I can do it, because you’re my strength, Tru. You make me want to be a better man, a good dad to our baby. The best. And I want to spend the rest of my life taking care of you both,” I hear his voice break before he continues in a quieter tone. “I don’t want to be him, Tru. I don’t ever want our kid to experience what I did growing up, and that’s what will keep me straight. You’ll both keep me straight.”
I see tears staining his cheeks, and my heart shatters.
I choke out a sob. Releasing my seat belt, I throw myself into his lap.
His arms grip me with a vice force, and he buries his face in my neck. “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me for leaving you.”
“I do. Of course I do. I’m sorry I said I hated you. I don’t. I never could. I was just hurting.”
“Right now, I’d deserve it if you did hate me, but it would break me if you did.”
Lifting his head, he looks at me, and the force of his gaze hits me straight in the heart.
I trace his tears away with my fingertips and kiss over every inch of his face, moving slowly, until he catches my lips with his.
“Don’t ever leave me again,” he breathes against my mouth.
“How did you know I was at the airport?”
Moving from me, he rests his head against the headrest. “Jackson called to tell me you’d left in a cab, so I had him call the cab company to find out where they were taking you.”
Ever resourceful. That’s Jake.
I touch my hand to his face, running my fingers into his hair, gently twisting the ebony strands around the tips, and he closes his eyes, content.
Watching him, I hope that our baby looks just like him. I hope it has Jake’s lovely features and beautiful blue eyes and my skin tone. But not my Puerto Rican–size bum.
Then I feel doubt start to creep in again. What if he changes his mind once the baby arrives? I don’t think I could bear his leaving then.
“Jake,” I murmur. He opens his eyes. “Are you absolutely sure this is what you want? The baby, I mean.”
“I’m sure.” His gaze drops to my stomach. “This baby will be made of everything I have loved my whole life.”
“I’m gonna get fat,” I mumble.
“No, you’re going to get even sexier.” Coming close again, he wraps his arms around me tightly, rubbing the tip of his nose against mine. “How could I not want something made up of Trudy Wethers’s DNA?”
“Still Bennett.” I grin. “You haven’t made an honest woman of me yet.”
“You ready to hop that plane to Vegas now?”
“A shotgun wedding. My folks would be so proud.” I laugh.
“What do you want to do about the wedding?” he asks. “Move it forward?”
“That would give me a matter of weeks to plan it. Why don’t we just wait until after the baby is born?”
I see him quickly do the math in his head. “We wouldn’t be able to get married July twenty-first. You okay with that?”
“I’m going to have a mini-Jake soon. Of course I’m okay with that.”
“Or a mini-Tru,” he says. Then his expression suddenly changes. “Fuck, a girl. We might have to lock her up, Tru.”
I scrunch up my face. “Why?”
“Because, if she looks anything like you, I’m one day going to be fighting off horny teenage boys left, right, and centre. I’ll probably end up in jail for beating one to death if I find him with his hands on my baby girl.” He shudders comically.
I let out a laugh. “Let’s hope if we have a boy, he’s doesn’t grow up to be one of those horny teenagers…or God forbid, as horny as you are. Otherwise we’ll have some girl’s dad round here kicking his ass.”
“Then I’ll end up in jail for beating the shit out of the dad—fuck, this is a no-win, sweetheart,” he groans, dropping his head back against the rest. “I’m doomed to a future behind bars.”
Laughing softly, I say, “Don’t worry, baby, we’ll figure a way to keep you out of prison.” I kiss the tip of his nose, then open the door, ready to get out of the car and into the house to bed.
Once inside, I head to the bedroom, grabbing a glass of water from the kitchen to take with me.
Smiling, feeling a million times happier than I did the last time I was here, I walk into our bedroom to find Jake still dressed and sitting on the edge of the bed, staring down at something in his hand. He doesn’t look happy.
“You were really leaving me,” he whispers.
My eyes go to his hand, and I see my engagement ring.
Crap.
My face prickles, shame burning it when I see how hasty I was in taking it off.
“I’m sorry.” I take a step toward him. “I was angry, and I thought you didn’t want the baby. I thought we didn’t have a future anymore.”
Jake gets to his feet. Coming over to me, he takes the glass from my hand and puts it down on the bedside cabinet.