The toilet I had sex with Jake in.
I feel sick.
Then I catch Jake’s eye, and for that brief moment my heart stop its beat.
He doesn’t look happy. He looks angry.
I look away.
He can’t be annoyed that I’m dancing with Stuart, surely? One – Stuart’s gay. And two – he’s just had his tongue stuck down another woman’s throat.
The thought turns my stomach. I shut the image out of my mind.
You know what? I hope it is pissing him off. Right now I want to hurt him, and I’m going to do just that.
I throw my arms around Stuart’s neck and moving close to his body, I dance into him.
As we move around, I see Tom look at me, then lean across and say something in Jake’s ear.
Jake nods his head without taking his eyes off me.
My cheeks start to burn. It’s awful knowing I’m being talked about, but no clue as to what’s being said.
Does Tom know about us? Seems like everyone else does, so why not Tom too, he is one of Jake’s closest friends after all, him and Denny both.
Jake pulls a cigarette out of his pack and lights up. Then throws back his glass of whiskey, and refills it from the bottle on the table.
“A girl who can dance – finally!” Stuart cheers, pulling my attention back to him, grabbing hold of my hips. “I’ve found my Ginger! Tru, seriously, if you had less tits and more cock, I’d be proposing marriage to you right now!” He spins me around.
“It can always be arranged,” I laugh. “Marry me?” I hold out my hand dramatically to him.
He grabs it and yanks me back to his chest. “Vegas tomorrow, baby. I’ll be the one in white at the Elvis chapel.”
“I’ll be there.” I wink at him.
We both start laughing, as he starts to move me around the floor again.
I like Stuart. He’s so much fun, and so uncomplicated and as hot as hell. He could give Jake a run for his money in those stakes.
Why isn’t he straight?
Actually no, my life is complicated enough as it is without trying to add another guy into the picture.
“Our favourite rock star is not happy that I’m grinding with you on the dance floor,” he whispers in my ear.
“Right now, I’m having way too much fun to care whatever Jake is.”
“Atta girl!” He smacks my behind with his hand, and I squeal with laughter, as he spins me around and presses his chest up against my back.
Bending his knees into mine, taking me down slowly with him, and then back up.
Dancing with me just like Jake did in the club.
The first night we slept together.
“Uh-oh, here comes the trouble now,” Stuart whispers in my ear.
I flicker my eyes in Jake’s direction and see he is on his feet, stubbing his cigarette out in the ashtray, has a seriously pissed off look on his face, eyes fixed on me and Stuart, and is now heading straight for us.
My stomach flips over.
Maybe I’ve pushed it too far? No, he was just giving mouth to mouth to his little groupie before. I’m doing nothing wrong.
But what if he causes a scene in front of Will?
“Don’t worry, gorgeous, I can handle Jake, it’s my job – remember?” Stuart whispers, seeing my worried expression. “He won’t cause a scene, I promise you.”
I want to believe that, but Jake can be irrational.
When he reaches us, his face is stony. I think he’s going to chew me out here and now, but ignoring me, he turns to Stuart.
He leans in and whispers something in Stuart’s ear, while I stand here like a spare part.
Stuart puts his hand on Jake’s shoulder, saying something back to him. I wish I could hear their exchange.
Jake’s expression tightens. Whatever Stuart said, Jake didn’t like it.
Stuart turns to me, giving me a warm smile. “I gotta go work for a little while, gorgeous. Always on the clock.” He winks at me. “We’ll finish this dance later?”
“Definitely,” I smile.
I start to walk away, going the opposite direction to Stuart, heading back to our table, but Jake catches hold of my hand, pulling me back. “Where are you going?”
I yank my hand free. “Well you just got rid of my dance partner, so now I’m going to drink myself into next week.”
“Can I come with you?”
I press my lips together and stare him.
“Dance with me.” He holds his hand out.
“Yeah, because that worked out so well for me the last time I did. And where’s your redhead anyway? Won’t she want to dance with you?”
Withdrawing his hand, he stares down at me. “She’s not mine, I told you, there’s only one girl I want to be mine.”
My skin aches on my suddenly tired bones.
“You seem to have staked a fairly certain claim on her earlier.” I’m trying to come off as nonchalant, but the truth is, it’s hurting like a bitch.
I want to call him out for kissing her after having sex with me, but now certainly is not the time or the place.
The previous song fades and No Doubt’s, ‘Don’t Speak’ starts to pump out through the speakers.
Jake looks up like Gwen Stefani is here and speaking to him right now. And really the song couldn’t be more apt for him and I.
I wonder if he’s thinking the same.
He looks down at me, a sudden darkness in his light eyes. “Well the woman I want is here with another man … so what’s a guy to do?” he says the words slow, deliberate.
Honestly, right now, I have no clue. But all I do know is we’re ripping each other to pieces. And this song is killing me.
I make to leave, but he’s not letting me go anywhere and the next thing I know he’s up against my back, arms holding me there, dancing with me, moving me with him.
“Stay with me tonight,” he whispers in my ear. “I don’t want to sleep without you. I need you.”