BLAIRE
I needed to get out of the house. Rush didn’t want me taking Nate anywhere and since I was Nate’s walking food source then we couldn’t be separated long. He still refused to take a bottle. I had tried pumping and feeding him but it wasn’t working. He just wanted me. Which was sweet but his daddy was so dang overprotective he got pissy if people came over and wanted to hold him.
I was worried that by the time my six weeks were up and it was okay for us to have sex again he was going to be impossible to live with. I needed to do something to take the edge off or he was going to explode.
The first week staying home was easy. I was tired and Nate didn’t sleep a lot at night so I wasn’t physically able to go out during the day. I had felt bad about not going to Mr. Kerrington’s funeral. Woods was my friend and I hated that he’d lost his father so unexpectedly. Rush assured me that Woods would be fine after I burst into tears once I heard the news. I didn’t know Mr. Kerrington so my only excuse for crying was that I was having hormonal issues called the baby blues. Or at least that is what my doctor told me.
The uncontrollable need to cry went away the day I was able to fasten my pre-baby jeans with no problem. I had gone into Nate’s room and rocked him for an hour while he slept which was something his pediatrician had told me not to do. It would spoil him. It was just so hard at times. I wanted to remember these days. He would be running around the house soon enough.
When Nate turned a month old I put my foot down and told Rush it was time we went somewhere with him. Rush agreed that he had to get over it and we spent over an hour getting all his supplies together just to go eat dinner at the club. By the time we got home I was so tired I figured that maybe it wasn’t worth it. We could just stay home until he was weaned. Then at that thought I promptly burst into tears because I was an awful mother.
Rush took Nate and put him to bed for me while I went to get a shower. I was behind on sleep. I needed to stop nursing Nate at night like his pediatrician suggested but I’d been weak and kept giving in. I had to stop it.
I stepped out of the shower and stood in front of the mirror. My hips were wider now. I was positive they would always be like this. I was wearing all my pre pregnancy clothes but I didn’t look like I used to look. My body was a mom body now.
“Damn. I’ve been trying not to look at you naked because I’m trying real hard not to resort to taking matters into my own hands but fuck... you’re gorgeous.”
Hearing the desire in his voice did wonders for my self-esteem. I wanted to feel sexy again. I wanted sex again. We had two more weeks until my doctor’s appointment. I wasn’t sure I could last that long.
I turned around and walked over to him. Sex might be off limits but me making sure my man was happy wasn’t. I leaned up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to his and then bit down on his bottom lip. I was tired of being sweet and romantic. I wanted to be bad.
I pulled his shirt off and kissed down his chest smiling to myself as his breath hitched and he grabbed a hold of my hair. I unsnapped his jeans and pushed them down around his ankles along with his boxers. His erection stood out proudly and my mouth watered. He was so gorgeous. Even this part of him was a turn on. Slipping one hand around the base of his cock I slid the tip into my mouth and pressed it in until the head hit the back of my throat.
“Holy fucking shit, Blaire,” Rush groaned, falling against the doorframe for support. He buried both his hands in my hair and held me there. I pulled back letting his cock spring free of my mouth with a pop and then teased the head with my tongue. His curses and moans only made me hotter.
“Suck it, please God, baby, suck it deep again,” he begged, pushing my head down over him until the head once again slid into my throat. I gagged and enjoyed the groan of pleasure coming from Rush. He was enjoying hearing me gag. I was turning myself on.
I dropped my hand to slip between my legs and let Rush control how much of his cock went into my mouth with his grip on my hair. “Fucking hell, are you touching yourself?” he asked, panting as he pulled back out of my mouth.