“If you just wanted me, then you wouldn’t have been able to sleep with anyone else. With or without my consent. That’s all I’m saying.”
Krit shoved away from me and started pacing. “Fuck that. It’s not fair, Jess. I was drinking. I get horny as hell when I’m onstage. It gets my blood pumping. You know that.”
I grinned this time. I couldn’t help it. “I know. And I’m telling you it’s okay. I just have other things going on right now I have to deal with.”
Krit stopped pacing and bent down and picked up the papers he had thrown down: several articles from an event this weekend, where Jax Stone and Star had performed for charity. But the photos weren’t of Jax. They were of Star, and on her arm was Jason.
“This is what you’re dealing with. This little shit. He used you. He’s fucking with your head. I saw you looking at him last weekend. You wanted him. I could taste it on you. Don’t let him fuck you up. He can’t be what you want, love. Hell, I have a hard time being what you want. You want a fucking lot. You deserve it, but he won’t be the one to do it.”
Krit started to say more and stopped. Instead he turned around and walked to his car. I didn’t watch him go. I was too busy staring at the photo of Jason and Star taken on Friday night. The same night he had called me. He had said he was going out with Sadie and Jax. He hadn’t been lying. He’d just left out the small piece of information that he was dating Star.
Krit was right. I was wanting a fairy tale. I wasn’t getting a fairy tale. I was a stripper’s daughter. Nothing more. I was trying to be someone I wasn’t. Someone I would never be. I started to wad the paper up and stopped myself. Instead I smoothed it out. I would put it away, and when I needed reminding of just how stupid I was when it came to Jason, I would pull it out again. Remind myself.
* * *
Friday night I spent extra time getting ready. I wore my shortest skirt and my tightest top. I even finished it off with the expensive boots Jason had bought me. I hadn’t been able to wear them again. But I was tired of acting like they were some shrine to him. I should be enjoying something from our time together.
My hair looked good down tonight, and I put extra eye makeup on to give me a sultry look. By now everyone would know Krit and I were over and I was free to flirt and be flirted with. It was rebound night for me, and I planned on drinking too much and dancing all night.
When I walked into Live Bay, the night was already in full swing. I stopped by the bar and grabbed a whiskey before heading over to the table where Rock was watching me with a concerned, fatherly frown. I just winked at him, which made his frown deepen. I shifted my gaze to Dewayne, who was the only other person at the table right now. Licking my bottom lip suggestively, I set my glass down and leaned forward, knowing that even though he viewed me as Rock’s little cousin, he was going to look at my tits.
“Wanna dance?” I asked.
“No,” Rock answered for him.
“Hell yes,” Dewayne replied.
“Stand up and I’ll make you sit down,” Rock warned him.
Dewayne just laughed and took a drink.
“What are you doing, Jess?” Rock asked.
“Drinking, then dancing,” I replied with a smile I didn’t feel.
“It’s not like you,” he replied.
“No. It’s exactly like me. This is me, Rock. I’m done pretending to be someone else. Now, why can’t Dewayne dance with me?” I asked, turning to pout at Dewayne, who looked very amused.
“Stop flirting with Dewayne,” Rock said, annoyed.
“I’m enjoying it. Please, let her continue,” Dewayne said, leaning back to look at me through half-hooded eyes as he smoked a cigarette.
Maybe I should be careful with him. He seemed like he might just be more than I could handle. “Fine. I’ll go dance by myself,” I told them, taking a long swig of my drink before turning and walking out to the dance floor.
I made sure to swing my hips just enough to draw attention. I wouldn’t dance alone for long. This was what I was good at. I had watched my momma control men my entire life. It came easy to me.
“Heard you and Krit are over,” a deep voice said as warm fingers circled my arm. I turned to see Justin Monroe. He had been the senior quarterback in high school my freshman year.
“Yeah, we are,” I replied with a flutter of my eyelashes and a slow smile. “But I just want to dance.”
Justin grinned. “Lead the way,” he said.
I walked us into the center of the crowd. Luckily, this was Green’s song. He sang the solo on it, so I didn’t have to hear Krit singing while I adjusted to my life after Jason Stone.
Justin rested his hands on my hips, and I moved to the music while smiling up at him. He was a safe distraction. Nothing dangerous. He’d been engaged to the preacher’s daughter in town once, but that had fallen through. Not sure why. I didn’t hang out in their circle, and they were older than me.
Green announced a break, and I stopped dancing when the radio took over playing music.
“Need a drink,” I told him, and then I left him there while I went back to the table. I didn’t ask him to come with me. It had just been a dance, and he’d be one of many.
Rock was shaking his head at me when he saw me coming.
I picked up my drink. “What?” I snapped.
“You’re stirring up trouble,” Rock said.
I rolled my eyes and took a drink. “I’m dancing,” I replied.
“And here he comes,” Dewayne drawled.
I glanced back, expecting to see Justin, but Krit was headed our way instead. Hadn’t expected him. He normally had quickies backstage first.
Krit’s hand wrapped around my arm and he pulled me to him. “We need to talk. Now.”
I shook my head.
“I’ll cause a fucking scene,” Krit warned.