“It’s not fair,” she whispered. “The townspeople need Doc more than ever and he’s not—”
“They have you,” I said.
“I’m not as good. There are so many things I haven’t learned.”
“I bet there’s a doctor in Soldier’s Pond. As soon as you get there, find him and tell him you mean to continue your studies.”
That stalled her tears. “Will we be there that long?”
“I’m not sure,” I said honestly. “But anything you learn will help down the line and bring you a little closer to feeling like you’ve earned the right to be called doctor.”
Tegan hugged me back, then let go. “Thank you.”
I didn’t say any of the warm things bubbling at the back of my mind—about how she could cry later or that Doc and Mrs. Tuttle had been good people, well worth her tears. There was no time for softness. I strode over to Morgan.
“If your men are ready, we can move out now. I’m told we’re within whistling distance of a battle we can’t win.”
To his credit, he didn’t ask for particulars. The stench of burning buildings mingled with the unmistakable scent of seared flesh motivated him well enough. In low tones, he gave orders to his men, who began rounding up the injured. Some of them would require transport, which meant this journey would take more like three or four days instead of the two we had managed with a hard march. A knot formed in my stomach when I considered how many things could go wrong before I got the survivors to Soldier’s Pond.
Ruse
Fade came up to me as Morgan’s men were lashing branches to make litters for the wounded. Despite the dire situation, his posture was loose and limber. Unlike most, he thrived under such conditions. Most likely, this trait permitted him to survive alone down below. When other people fell apart, he only got tougher and more determined, and the more he fought, the more he won, the higher his confidence rose. I didn’t know if tonight’s victory would improve his emotional state, but I hoped so. Tegan had made it clear there was no way for me to fix him. The shift had to come from inside Fade’s own head.
My body ached. To cover my weakness, I asked, “How do you like our chances?”
“I don’t,” he admitted. “But I’d like it less if we didn’t try.”
That summed up my feelings, too. “We won’t be sleeping for a while. Hope you’re ready.”
“How do you prepare for something like this? I wish it hadn’t come to a desperate evac … but it’s good to feel useful again.” Fade gestured at the soot-stained faces and children terrified to silence at the upending of their orderly world.
Among their number, I saw Zachary Bigwater but neither of the elder Bigwaters, nor his sister, Justine. The kid looked older than he had a few days before when he’d begged to come with us because he was sweet on Tegan. In a heartbeat, everything could change. He wore despair like a necktie; it slumped his shoulders and kept his head low. For some reason, he couldn’t meet anybody’s gaze. Tegan tried to talk to him, but he turned away without speaking.
“He’s carrying a pretty big burden,” I said softly.
“Losing everything isn’t easy.”
Fade knew that better than anyone. Once, he had a sire and dam who loved him. First she got sick, then his sire did, ultimately leaving him alone. A lesser boy would’ve wound up in the gangs and let them take away everything his parents taught him. Instead he fled to the dangers and darkness down below, determined to hold fast to the person they’d taught him to be. Even down below, the elders hadn’t touched the inner core that made him special. I admired him for that.
I loved him for everything.
Studying the refugees, I shook my head in perplexity. It was preposterous to imagine that we could herd such a large group to Soldier’s Pond while escaping detection, but failure was unthinkable. Somehow we had to deliver them to safety; otherwise everything about Salvation would be lost. I understood that intuitively, seeing echoes of the ruins. All the people who lived and loved in Gotham had been decimated. I didn’t want to see that happen to the people who had been kind enough to take us in.
“They have no chance without us,” I whispered.
“It’ll come down to avoiding enemy scouting parties,” Stalker said, joining us.
“Do you have some ideas in that regard?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Maybe.”
“Let’s hear them.”
“We could split into smaller groups, trying to lead them away from the refugees.”
I shook my head. “That would leave them defenseless if the strategy failed.”
“If it comes down to a straight-up fight, we’ve already lost,” Stalker said flatly.
Fade prickled to life. “With that attitude, what’re you doing here? Shouldn’t you be saving your own skin? You excel at that, as I recall.”
At the veiled reference to how he’d abandoned his cubs at the first sign of trouble in the ruins and threw his lot in with us because we knew how to fight the Freaks, Stalker narrowed his eyes and took a step forward. While I didn’t want them arguing, I was glad to see Fade getting angry about anything, even strategy.
Still, I stepped between them and shook my head. “We should talk to Morgan. Presumably he’s been fighting the Freaks longer than we have.” He was older anyway, though that didn’t always mean what I thought it should in terms of experience. “Come on.”