Lazy Dungeon Master - Page 265/325

Extra: A Certain Typical Dungeon

A story about when Kehma was busy doing this and that during the Dungeon Battle.

A certain Dungeon Core—Core No. 629 was leisurely managing his dungeon that was set to be a grassland.

He was a rabbit-type Dungeon Core. As an orange rabbit, the first floor of his dungeon was the surrounding grassland itself.

“Haah, nyo adventurers nyow either~. So myuch spare time~”

Core No. 629 was hopping about with three other rabbits.

These rabbits were dungeon monsters, more or less. Unlike ordinary rabbits, they each had a single horn growing from their foreheads: horned rabbits… Other than their horns, they were no different from normal rabbits.

“I caught a grasshopper~. Looky looky~”

“Omnomnom nom nom…. grass is tasty~”

“Ow~!? Who bit my nyeaaar!?”

The rabbits were happy-go-lucky and were messing around. The sight of them doing so was very pleasant.

As for how they communicated, Core No. 629 being a rabbit-type core was sufficient for them to understand each other. However, there were times where the rabbits did not listen to what they were told due to their lacking intelligence.

“Nyuu guys~. Make sure nyuu look around~! Want some kyarrots?”

“Come on~, 629-syama isn’t myotivated either though~”

“The weather’s so nyice~, the grass is so gooooood.”

“I wanna rub my floofy tail though~”

Core No. 629 sighed, not knowing what to do about his whimsical rabbits.

It was peaceful.

It was nice spending everyday sunbathing outside, but doing that wouldn’t earn him DP.

By the way, defeating a grasshopper would give him 1 DP. Locusts would give 5 DP, too. As this meadow was located in an area where not many humans went, grasshopper hunting was important work to earn funds.

“Ah—”

And, just then, he saw a hawk flying through the sky. Hawks were birds of prey, a rabbit’s natural predator.

They only saw rabbits as food. His dungeon didn’t have an underground floor back when he first started, so many of his fellow rabbits were taken by them, never to return.

“Oi lazy byums! Enemy spotted, let’s give it to him!”

“”” ROJYAAAH! “””

If they got caught by the enemy, that would be the end. They assembled into an anti-hawk combat formation.

Of the three horned rabbits, two were on the ground with one on top of them.

“Nyukay, I’m going to run away so do nyour best!”

“”” Eeeehhh!? “””

“What? If it myanaged to get me the dyungeon would end~”

“Truuuue, but…”

“Kyinda cruel?”

“Ah, hyold on, the hawk’s here. Intercept, intercept~!”

The hawk lowered its altitude to attack. Taking their chance, the three rabbits leapt at it.

Two of them turned into the footstools while the third leapt into an attack. By hopping off of the ground and once again from the backs of the other two, it hurled its body high into the air like a multi-stage rocket.

This was the secret technique they developed to take down hawks, the Pyon Pyon Attack!

“Ah—missed.”

“Whoops.”

“We’re dyead~”

But as a one-shot kind of move, it came with the huge gamble of them missing so high up in the air.

Even though they missed, the hawk returned to the sky to start over after realizing they launched a counteroffensive.

“Don’t gyive up! We can still do it!”

“629-sama, run away~!”

“We can dyo it! I’ll be a footstool this time tyoo!”

They quickly assembled into formation once again. This time, Core No. 629 also participated as one of the footstools. The horned rabbits put their feet on Core No. 629’s head and prepared the formation.

The hawk once against descended and took aim.

“Now! Pyon Pyon Attack #2!”

“Ah, wyait—”

“Uwaah, whaaat!?”

Their tempo collapsed. The hawk descended as though it saw a chance to attack, but the rabbit that launched into air fell back down and barely managed to hit the hawk with a headbutt from above.

Falling to the ground, the hawk breathed its last after a train wreck of various people making various mistakes.

“While embyarrassing, we did it~”

“Good job. Nyow to groom myself~”

“We can hold our nyears as high as bro!”

The three horned rabbits frolicked about. Core No. 629 decided to shoo them off of his head and on to the ground.

Upon collecting the hawk’s corpse, his DP increased by 150. A good income.

“Hmph, nyot a hard enemy at all! Easy win, easy win.”

“629-sama, nyuu tried running away~”

“Yeah~, nyuu tried running~”

“… What’re nyuu lazybyones chattering about… okay, I’ll reward nyuu! Strawberries!”

“”” STRAWBERRIES!! “””

Strawberries were rare delicacies for rabbits. It would be bad for their stomachs if they ate too many, but nothing held more appeal to them as long as they kept it to small amounts.

He’s gotten an unexpectedly good amount of DP, so splurging a little would be alright. Dungeon Core No. 629 looked over his three horned rabbits in contentment, still unsure of what to do about them.

“We nyormally only get to eat grass spawner weeds~”

“Those taste good too, but strawberries really do taste the best~!”

“Fuheheh, strawberries, gimme strawberries, gimme gimme~!”

“… Alright nyow, let’s head byack for strawberries, nkay~?”

“”” STRAWBERRIES~~~! “””

By the way, this dungeon, [Rabbit Paradise] increased in difficulty as one went lower underground.

It had magic rabbits, rabbits that acquired the ability to use magic, armor rabbits, rabbits that wore solid armor, as well as soldier rabbits, rabbits that walked on two legs and used both weapons and armor. New adventurers would occasionally chase a rabbit and stray into its borders, never to be seen again… its nonreturn rate is 99%, with a 100% nonreturn rate for its underground floors.

Its a field dungeon that not even the guild knows the location of thanks to that, but for the select few adventurers that love rabbits, this paradise’s existence is gossiped about as gospel.