I’d had a funny feeling he was going to say that. I sighed, and tried to gather up my strength for the rest of the evening.
You can handle anything they throw at you, Jane True, I told myself.
As long as you take off those stupid fucking shoes.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
A dryad did my makeup, and all I can say is Bobbi Brown, watch out. I looked hot. I’d asked if she could do smoky eyes, and if I’d managed “slightly hazy” she achieved “smoke, wind, and fire.”
That I was asking a creature I’d heretofore only studied in Mythology 101 to give me smoky eyes didn’t really faze me. I had discovered that instead of being shocked or afraid of Ryu’s world, I reveled in the weird. I was suddenly an utterly average wall flower in an imaginarium of the bizarre. It was a wholly satisfying treat for me to feel suddenly… banal.
“You look lovely, Jane,” Elspeth breathed, as she adjusted my bangs slightly. Elspeth had been introduced to me as my “personal attendant,” which was something I couldn’t get over. I was more fazed to have a maid than I was that she was a dryad. I wasn’t really sure if I was in fairy land or turn-of-the-century New York. I felt like Lily Bart, and I wondered if I would have to tip Elspeth with my winnings from that evening’s bridge. But considering this lady’s maid lived in a tree, I doubted her personal expenses were very large.
I was dressed, again, in the red wrap dress. Luckily, I’d managed not to drool on it at dinner last night. I wanted to save my kimono dress for tomorrow, and from there I’d figure out what to wear on our last evening in the Compound. I hoped that the supernatural folk did things like humans and that Thursday would be slightly less dressy than Friday, although that left formal attire for Saturday. But for all I knew they would have a Hawaiian-style luau on Saturday, complete with leis and roasted pig. Picturing the king in a Hawaiian shirt over some swim trunks made me giggle. And then I pictured him as a Speedos man and all laughter ceased.
Elspeth stood me up to adjust the wrap’s sash and led me to the mirror. My jaw dropped, my mouth curling into a silent “o” at the sight of the woman reflected back at me. I was gorgeous. And it wasn’t just the makeup or the dress—it was like that new Jane I’d always dreamed about was suddenly staring back at me. This Jane stood tall and proud, no longer hiding. Elspeth had put my hair up in a twist, and I’d let her trim my bangs a bit. So nothing concealed my eyes, something I would normally have been horribly self-conscious about. But this Jane’s dark gaze looked sexy and exotic, not weird or crazy.
For a second, I nearly panicked. This isn’t me, I thought, staring at the confident young woman in the mirror.
Exactly, I realized. This isn’t you. And it’s fucking awesome… So suck it up and enjoy yourself.
I had just turned around to check out my own ass when Ryu walked in. He was also wearing the same suit he’d worn the other night, and he looked just as handsome.
“Great minds, and all that.” He grinned, watching as Elspeth finished fussing. She smiled at me and whispered, “Go forth, with pride,” which I assumed was a tree’s way of saying, “Knock ’em dead.” I appreciated her kind words, as well as her efforts, and gave her a little hug.
She left, leaving Ryu and me to stare at each other. He was looking pretty foxy so I wasn’t really able to be too angry with him, but the queen’s words had still stung.
“Jane,” he said finally. “About what Morrigan said—”
“About me being the equivalent of a power bar?” I finished, dryly.“Yes,” he said, coming over to put his hands on my hips. He looked down into my eyes, pulling his sincerest face. “I have to admit you are quite a mouthful,” he said, and it was such a sexy thing to say that part of me was actively promoting I give him a mouthful right then and there, while the other part of me was totally pissed off for being so easily manipulated. “But,” he continued, “that’s just it. You are everything your blood promises. Throughout our time together you have been strong, adaptive, and heady; your presence fills a room, invades my thoughts.” I saw some fang as he leaned down to kiss me, punctuating his sentence. “You’re already amazing and my mind reels at your potential. I see you as an example of our kind’s future and to me that is as exciting as your blood, your body,” he finished, running his hands up my arms to cup my face, his kiss deepening.
I sank into his arms, cooing happily, until we were interrupted by the sound of my stomach booming its protest through the room like a clap of thunder. The vampire started and I sighed, drooping in Ryu’s embrace. I have an exceptional talent for the ruining of moments.
My lover straightened up, looking both amused and slightly miffed. “Hungry?” he inquired.
“Of course.” I grinned at him, ruefully. “Do you have to ask?”
“Well, let’s go down and get you something to eat. I need to keep my little power bar packed with nutrients.”
I considered threatening him with a good spanking for that comment. But I was fairly certain that he’d say yes, meaning I’d never get dinner. And I, too, have my priorities.
Luckily, we went in a side door this time—I could not have borne another walk of shame down that long aisle. A few beings smiled when they saw me, but overall everyone was being very circumspect about my near face-plant, for which I was grateful.
We had come in through a door that emerged about midway through the throne room, and Ryu took a moment to look around, as if planning his next move. I took advantage of my chance to rubberneck, and man, did I get an eyeful. The room itself was relatively plain. There was the dreaded central aisle, carpeted by its rich red runner, but the rest of the floor and the walls were all the same gray stone. Many huge pillars supported the cathedral-like ceiling, which was made of glass. There were no other windows in the great hall.
If the room was unadorned, however, its inhabitants more than made up for that. To our right, and nearest to the throne, there seemed to be quite a few beings similar to the king and queen. They all exhibited the same uncanny tranquility and were equally colorless, vibrating with power at the same time that they displayed a curious lack of vitality. I assumed they were all Alfar.
Intermixed with the Alfar were some creatures I recognized, or at least thought I recognized, and others that were a complete mystery to me. The succubae and their male counterparts, the incubi, were easy. They were the ones that made me reach to undo my wrap the minute they looked at me. But other than their extreme powers of seduction, they came in all shapes and sizes. Iris was admittedly gorgeous, but not all the rest of her kin were so stunning. In fact, some were downright average in appearance. And yet they were all captivating. They bore themselves with such confidence, exuding an air of sexual frankness, that it almost transcended charisma. And I had the feeling that their powers of attraction could only partially be attributed to magic.
I was, however, mystified by the apparent predilection for vaguely piratical mustachios among the incubi, but I guess there is no accounting for taste. I do enjoy a good “mustache ride” joke, however, and the naughty half of my brain was merrily riffing away.
Meanwhile, towering over everyone else, their mucus-weeping eyes coldly assessing those around them, were goblins galore. “Why all the goblins?” I asked Ryu, on the down low.
“They’re sort of our community’s version of white-collar workers: doctors, lawyers, accountants, and stockbrokers. They’re tremendously intelligent and curious beings, and they’re especially good at understanding the intricacies of human society. I think it’s that they appreciate a good bureaucracy. Give a goblin a thick sheaf of paperwork, to be completed in triplicate, and you’ve made yourself a friend for life.”
“And is that a giant?” I hissed, nodding behind us toward an absolutely enormous and incredibly ugly pair of creatures that were guarding the doors we were standing in front of, and, I now noticed, seemed to be on guard duty throughout the room.
“No,” Ryu said, his eyes surreptitiously still roving around the room as he patently overacted engaging in conversation with me. He was really scanning the crowd, looking for someone. “Giants are extinct. They were killed off by humans, believe it or not.” He nodded when I made a “huh?” face. “Giants traded all of their offensive powers for their huge size and a few strong defensive shields to block elemental attacks. They never thought they’d have to contend with teeny-tiny spears. Early hominids hunted giants as they later did mammoths.” He shook his head, sadly. “It was a lesson for us all.”
“So, what are those big guard thingies?” I prompted him. They were enormous and sort of knotty. If I hadn’t already met a dryad and discovered her to be almost human outside of her strange suppleness, I would have thought that the guards were tree spirits. But on further consideration, maybe they were more knobbly than knotty. They were fleshy and incredibly ugly—kind of the way I would imagine a troll to be.
Careful, Jane, I thought. Or you’ll offend an actual troll. They’re bound to be here, somewhere.