“Look at me, Maggie,” I demand, and her head tips down, her eyes meeting mine. “So beautiful, baby, you’re so fucking gorgeous taking my cock, taking all of me,” I praise her, sliding out then back in slowly.
“Faster, please,” she whispers, running her hand down my chest and over my abs.
“Just like this,” I whisper back, focusing on her face.
I swallow when her hand wraps around the side of my neck and her gaze locks on mine while her eyes fill with tears. “Don’t cry.” I drop her legs then my forehead to hers, never losing eye contact as I sink into her slowly, sliding my cock along her walls, feeling them ripple and tighten around me.
“Oh…” she whimpers, bringing her legs higher around my hips, forcing me impossibly deeper.
It takes everything in me not to slam into her, but I want this moment, I want her to have a memory of what it was like our first time. I want her to know without words how much she means to me. “Let yourself go, baby.” I kiss away the tears as they fall from her eyes. “Give yourself to me completely, Mags.”
“I…I don’t know if I can,” she whispers, and I know she’s talking about more than just this moment, but I’m not willing to accept anything less than all of her.
“You can. Trust me and let go,” I tell her softly, watching again as tears fill her beautiful eyes, eyes that hold me captive as she loses herself, clutching her arms and legs tighter around me as she rides out her orgasm. Burying my face in her hair, I lose myself deep inside her.
Mine! My mind screams as I roll to my back, taking her with me, never losing our connection as she falls limply against my chest. Roaming my hands over her smooth skin, I kiss the top of her head and close my eyes trying to get my heart rate and breathing under control.
“I get flashes. I’m not sure if they are real or not,” she says quietly, and my hands still. “I remember laughing when you…when you were marking me.”
“That happened,” I tell her, moving my hands again.
“I…” She lets out a long, deep breath then raises her head to rest her chin on my chest. “I hate that I don’t remember.”
Running my fingers down her jaw, I watch her eyes slide half closed. “We’ll make new memories,” I assure her, adjusting my hips, leaving her warmth, but then dragging the blanket over us.
“We’ll also make a baby if I don’t get on birth control,” she mutters, looking over my shoulder at the pillow. Feeling my mouth lift, I run my fingers along her bottom lip, gaining her eyes again. I could think of worse things than her having my child, but she was right; we don’t need a baby, at least not yet. “I’ll make sure we’re more careful from now on.”
“Thanks,” she whispers, and I study her beautiful face then ask the question that has been plaguing me.
“How were you still a virgin?” I didn’t know there were such thing as virgins, at least not in this day and age, not women older than nineteen at most. If she hadn’t told me she was before I slid into her, I wouldn’t have known. She is far too beautiful and far too seductive; hell, looking at her, all you can think about is sex.
“I didn’t have sex,” she says, pressing her lips together to keep from smiling. Tugging a piece of her hair, I wait for her to answer my question. “I don’t know. I guess it has a lot to do with my parents.” Feeling my body turn to granite, she shakes her head. “They never did anything to me. They just…” She pauses then searches my face for a moment.
“Sex was never made to seem like a big deal. When I was sixteen, they told me I was free to make my own choices about my body and what I did with it. They made it so casual that it scared me. My parents have both had relationships outside of their marriage. I mean, I know they love each other and they were honest about what they were or are doing, but I didn’t understand. I still don’t understand how they made it seem like it wasn’t a big deal to share a piece of themselves with someone they didn’t or don’t care about.” She pauses, pulling in a breath.
“The few times I’ve been close to losing control, something in me couldn’t let go and I would pull away. I know it’s stupid and unrealistic this day and age, but after a while, I got it in my head that I would only ever give myself completely to the man I planned on marrying,” she says as her cheeks grow pink and her bottom lip goes between her teeth.
“You didn’t close down with me,” I tell her, not even referring to the first time, but to this time.
“No, even my subconscious knows what you are to me,” she says softly, raising her hand to my jaw.
“And what’s that?” I ask gently, studying her features as they move over mine.
“I’m not sure. Important. Vital. Even if we don’t last, I know I’ll never regret giving myself to you,” she says, and my chest aches because I know I’m not worthy of her, not even close. But she needs to know that what she has given me means something to me.
“Sex has never meant anything to me. It’s always been just a release, a way to get rid of pent-up energy. I never knew it could be more,” I tell her, watching her eyes grow soft. “Being with you is something different, a completely different experience, one that takes sex to a whole new level. Makes me feel connected to you in a way that transcends time.”
“What?” she whispers in awe, and her face softens in a way I have never seen before.
“I didn’t wait for you, baby, but you have a piece of me no one else does.” I take her hand, resting it over my heart.
“Sven.” Her forehead drops to my chest, and I wrap my arms around her and roll her to her side.
Holding her, I look at the clock and let out a frustrated breath. “I wish I didn’t need to get up, but I need to go to the club.”
“I’ll go with you,” she says, starting to pull away.
“No, you’re staying home.”
“Sven…”
Before she can say anything, I roll her to her back, smooth her hair out of her face, and settle my hands under her jaw. “I need to know you’re safe. This isn’t something that’s up for debate. Until I’ve discussed what happened yesterday with Zack, Lane, and Teo and get their feedback about the situation, I’m not willing to let you step foot in the club.”
“I can take care of myself,” she growls, and I drop a kiss to her pouty lips then lean back and grin.
“I didn’t say you couldn’t take care of yourself, Maggie. I know you’re a fighter.” I smile then shake my head. “I don’t want you to have to fight, and I don’t want something to happen to you that I can prevent. Last night, you were drugged. I know we’re good now, but this situation could have been completely different had I not shown up at the club when I did.” My gut twists and I pull in a breath. “I fucking hate thinking about it like this, baby, but I took you when you didn’t know what you were doing.”
“Sven,” she whispers, bringing her hand up running her fingers along my jaw.
Turning my head, I press a kiss to her palm. “It’s true, baby. Fucked up, but true.”
“Okay, I’ll stay home,” she agrees, and I can tell she doesn’t want to, but is doing it for me.