“What about Kael?” he asked. A sliver of hope came through in his voice. “I'm pretty sure he won't want to help find my sister.”
“Don't worry, if I'm with you, he will surely be close by. He can't help it.” I grinned reassuringly to Joss, but felt my gaze search the darkness for Kael's form.
Sadness overcame me, as I knew my decision to help Joss first and not Kael would hurt the stoic SwordBrother and drive an even deeper wedge of hatred between us, one that I didn't think could be repaired.
Chapter 16
“Absolutely not! By all that is holy, I refuse to allow you to travel with this heathen.” Bearen breathed in deeply as if he were trying to make himself look more intimidating. At six foot four he was a bear of a man with his black beard and hawk-like nose, and his blue eyes were intense with anger. But he was only scary until he started to cough great heaving coughs that shook the whole house, which were the after effects of breathing in smoke as he saved Aldo’s child from a fire. Then, the clan leader was reduced to being tended to like a sick child as my cousin Siobhan rushed in with water and a handkerchief.
Odin, Fenri, Joss and I didn’t tell him that when he was sick with fever and passed out from pain, that I had Joss sneak into his house and heal him of the worst of the burns and blisters from the fire. I thought it prudent to have Joss heal him this time, so if he awoke he couldn’t accuse me of disobeying him. Except that when he awoke he didn’t notice how much better he felt. I think the great warrior was trying to play up being sick to get as much sympathy as he could, except for the cough. We didn’t touch his lungs because it would draw too many unwanted questions.
But he wouldn’t let a little cough burden him when he was about to lose his only daughter that he just found again. He wasn’t about to let her leave with his greatest enemy. When his cough had settled, he once again turned those angry eyes on me. “You are still underage, and must obey my rules. That is, until you become clan leader.”
I had been, up until that point, sitting on a short three-legged stool next to my father’s bed; but I sent the stool flying as I jumped up in anger and pointed to him. “Father, you have to listen to me. You’ve ignored me every time I’ve tried to tell you about what happened. But you can’t ignore it. Not anymore, especially when it was Rayneld that had a hand in my kidnapping. It was your brother that sold me to the Septori to be used as an experiment. It’s his entire fault that this happened to me.”
Siobhan, who had only a few days ago betrayed me and handed me over to my Uncle and cousin to be killed, stilled at my words. I don’t believe she would have done it if they hadn’t beaten her into submission. She had redeemed herself in my eyes when she rushed to the waterfall, sword in hand, and tried to save me from her brother. I glanced at her quickly to see if I offended her by bringing up her father’s involvement. But she seemed unaffected by my words and went on changing the bandages on Bearen’s almost healed wounds. It was as if, in her grief of losing her father and brother, she had sought comfort in caring for her uncle.
“You will listen because it involves your family,” I spat out. Bearen’s eyes widened in shock. “Your brother was trying to kill you at the pass. He was the one who hired those mercenaries to ambush us so he could become clan leader. Bvork was the one who, months ago, drugged my drink and led me outside where your brother handed me over to the Septori.”
My anger started to get the best of me and I could feel myself grasping for Faraway’s energy, something I tended to do when I got mad. But I quickly gained control of myself and released it. “Do you even know what they did to me?”
“Thalia, I told you that we would never speak of this, and you agreed to the Kragh Aru so you could find a strong lifemate and become clan leader.” Bearen was sounding desperate from hearing the words. As if, by my speaking them, he could ignore what happened. And I could still be the clan leader, still be a perfect example of a Sinnendor vassal, still be his little girl.
“No, father!” I interrupted him. “You agreed that I would never speak of this, not me. And I let my love for you keep me from speaking, but no longer.” I walked to the shuttered windows and threw it open, knowing that I would need the cool wind to blow on my face to remind me that I was free and no longer a prisoner.
“They took me to an underground prison where I and other children, human and Denai alike, were kept to be used as test subjects. They were cruel. They starved and beat us if we disobeyed or spoke. The overdose of serum that Bvork gave me erased my memories and every night I prayed that my family would find me.” I turned from the window to watch my father’s reaction. His eyes had closed and his face had turned pale; the only movement was the bobbing of his adam’s apple as he turned his head away so he wouldn’t hear what I said next. But even though he was my father I knew it was time he heard it; he couldn’t ignore it, and because I loved my father I would have to hurt him with the truth.
“I prayed that you would find me.” My anger started to disappear when I looked at my father’s stricken face. I knew he had searched desperately for me. “But no one came for any of us. Each night I would be hauled away to the Raven’s experimental lab and tortured, pricked, probed and subjected to a terrible machine. The Septori used their power and this machine to change me. I didn’t know what they were trying to do. I had no clue it had worked until after I escaped. Father, I’m no more a Denai than you are, but I’m definitely not human anymore. I can do things similar to a Denai, but the way I do it is wrong, twisted, inhuman. I steal where the Denai borrow. So if you think the Denai are inhuman beasts then I can only speculate at what you think I must be.” The tears that I had been holding back, started to burn at the corner of my eyes and run down my face.
“I had no idea,” Bearen whispered, his voice breaking and choking on the words. “I’m ashamed of myself and my clan for not being able to save you. But I had no idea what they did to you; I was too scared to know, for fear of hearing these very words. I thought maybe if I ignored it we could pretend that nothing happened. Pretend that I didn’t fail at saving my daughter, being there for her when she needed me most.” Bearen’s voice tapered off into nothingness and I heard soft sobs coming from behind me. Turning, I saw that Siobhan had righted my stool and was crying softly into her apron.
“Father, I survived, but my cell mate Cammie didn’t. She died in that prison along with countless other children that didn’t have to. And more are going to die, because the Raven and the Septori are still out there. One of the prisoners, Tym, was murdered during our escape.”
“Then let the Denai hunt for the Septori and this Raven; if he is a rogue Denai, then he is their problem, not ours.” Bearen defended. It was always hard to win an argument with Bearen, because he was so stubborn, but so was I.
“It’s not their problem, it’s everyone’s problem. Human and Denai alike were kidnapped. It was specifically because of my Sinnendor blood that the Raven wanted me.” I grasped my head to cease the sudden pounding that started again. Though they happened less often. Usually they were a sign when Kael was near; a side effect of our shared bond. Sure enough, a knock at my father’s bedroom door came and I wasn’t in the least bit surprised to see that it was Kael.