Someone was on a killing spree, and it wasn’t Carden.
I’d deal with this. I’d help him. I needed to think. First things first. I couldn’t call attention to myself. I needed to act normal. I’d go about my usual business and come up with a plan. What day was it? I’d go to class.
Wednesday. Combat Medicine day.
But Judge was the teacher and he was dead. Knowing the vamps, though, they’d have another teacher installed in there immediately, as though Judge had never existed.
Combat Medicine, then. I headed that way, knowing I’d need every ounce of discipline to sit in the classroom and act like I was paying attention as every girl stared at me. As Carden festered in a cell somewhere. As I pretended not to care.
Masha was leaning against the door to the sciences building as I entered. “Wonderful news,” she said, smiling brightly.
“Fabulous news,” I replied, grinning a little wildly. Was I having a psychotic break? I felt sort of giddy and unhinged. Kind of nuts. I’d worked myself into a lather as I’d walked across the quad. Whoever did this was going down. I’d take them down.
By the strange expression on Masha’s face, my manic reply had confused and freaked her out a little. Good. I’d take her down, too.
And the thing was, in my heart of hearts, this intense, self-effacing focus felt saner than I’d ever been.
Ronan was at the front of the class—of course. He was the likeliest temporary replacement for Judge. Seeing him standing there, though, alone and holding himself so stiffly, I felt a pang.
“Sorry,” I whispered as I passed him on the way to my seat. And I was. Ronan and Judge had been close. He’d lost so many people—more than I had. I couldn’t fathom it. Couldn’t fathom why he stuck around. But like all of us, he had his reasons.
But then I messed up and heard myself add, “Carden didn’t do it.” It’d sounded more vehement than I’d intended.
Ronan only looked at me with flat, dead eyes.
I took my seat.
I couldn’t think about Ronan just then. I felt bad, but if I were to do any good, I needed to numb myself.
I needed a plan. Investigating Trinity’s death had been a dead end. All I’d discovered was that there were two men on the island, probably vampires, who may or may not have been German and who might or might not be involved. Their words ran in a loop in my head. Is he in control? They grow reckless.
I didn’t know what to do with that. As I sat, waiting for class to start, I made a mental list of what I did know.
Alcántara was behind Carden’s arrest, which meant he wanted Carden dead. That probably also meant the whole Directorate wanted Carden dead. But why?
Acari Kate had seen something on that cliff top the day she fell, and something about that whole episode nagged at me.
Carden was imprisoned somewhere. My guess was the castle on the hill. Which led me to…
The Trainees. They knew stuff we didn’t.
My eyes went to Josh, settling in the seat next to me. He knew stuff that I didn’t.
I watched him, waiting for him to look over. I didn’t feel like talking, though, and he must’ve sensed that. When he finally did look at me, instead of his usual giddaying, he simply said, “Judge.”
Judge had been a good guy. We’d miss him. We were scared, and something about teachers getting killed made things feel out of control, but we couldn’t safely say any of that. For a moment, though, our eyes stayed connected, and we shared all that.
I held his gaze for an extra, pregnant moment before agreeing, “Judge.”
“There are many ways to die,” Ronan said, calling the class to order.
“Oh great,” I muttered, sinking low in my seat. A lecture on death and the many possible flavors of my inevitable demise was just what I needed. Not.
First Amanda, now Judge. But there Ronan stood, essaying on blood loss. It was just like him to power through grief by slamming into it head-on. Discussing exsanguination. Pinching veins, compressing arteries. The jugular. The carotid.
I thought of Carden, and my fear for him was a physical pain. I grazed my fingertips over my neck, feeling for those veins, remembering how I’d longed for Carden to kiss me just there. To taste me.
How was he? How long could he last without feeding?
I shoved my fist against my mouth, keeping my emotions in check. Carden could’ve claimed me as an alibi. He couldn’t have killed Tracer Judge if he’d been kissing me in a cave at the time of the murder. But here I was, still skipping around, going about my business, which meant he didn’t tell. He was protecting me.
I’d protect him, too. I might’ve been reckless, but I wasn’t stupid—I knew I couldn’t do it alone.
But who could I trust? I considered the options.
Mei-Ling. She’d seemed eager enough to play Nancy Drew when we’d talked in our room. The girl had hidden depths—not to mention some not-so-hidden resentments at being kidnapped and forcibly brought here.
Emma. I trusted Emma with my life. But…
Yasuo? I trusted him, too. But lately there was something missing. I sensed he’d give his life to help Em, but friendship wasn’t sophomore geometry. There was no Yas trusts Emma, Emma trusts me, therefore I trust Yas. Trust wasn’t transitive.
Josh. Odd that he was in the running, because I sure hadn’t trusted him at first. I glanced over at him. He’d helped me before, sticking his neck out to save me from hazing. Might he help me again?
He felt me looking and caught my eye. And yet again, rather than shoot me one of his signature doofy boy nods, there was something somber and supportive waiting for me in his gaze.
Josh, then.
Making like I was taking notes, I scribbled on a page of my notebook, tore it out, and passed it to him.
His eyes practically bugged out of his head as he snatched it up before anyone could see. Not a lot of in-class notes were passed on the Isle of Night.
“What the fuck?” he mouthed to me, then stole a quick look at the scrap.
I’d written: “We need to talk.”
He gave me an incredulous duh look and mouthed back, “Later.”
I tore another bit of paper, writing, “I want to know about the castle on the hill.”
He crammed it in his pocket. “Not now,” he mouthed impatiently.
I carefully ripped another tiny scrap, coughing to cover up the sound. Passing notes was a pretty stupid risk to take, but I was obsessed. And what was the worst that could happen—they’d lock me up with Carden? Though I knew instantly that wasn’t the worst punishment. Maybe, deep down, I felt okay taking the chance because it was Ronan up there at the front of the class—and wouldn’t he just blow a gasket to know I thought that way?
Either way, I needed to find out where Carden was being held, and the mystery began at the vampires’ keep. “Promise you’ll tell me about it,” I wrote.
Josh kept the paper and shoved it in his pocket. “Stop,” he whispered, not even looking at me.
I needed to get him to promise. I wrote on a new slip of paper, “No.”
He scribbled, “STOP IT,” flashed it at me, and shoved the paper into his pocket.
Ronan’s back was turned, listing on the board the body’s myriad pressure points. The topic was super-cool, and I regretted not paying attention. But Ronan might’ve been divulging the secret to the Vulcan nerve pinch for all I cared, and I wouldn’t lose my focus.
I tried again, flashing Josh the corner of my notebook. “I lost something. Is it in the castle?”
He looked at me then, and this time his anger was gone. Instead he wore a tired, feeling sort of expression. He’d known what—or rather, whom—I’d meant. With a sigh, he wrote back, “You’re going to get us in trouble.”
I gave him a hint of a smile, knowing I had him. “Pretty handwriting for a boy. Now…CASTLE?”
Josh watched, making sure Ronan wasn’t about to turn around, and he scrawled in his notebook, “We’ll talk later. Not like you to not pay attention, nerdbot. So stop.”
Ronan turned to face us, and I felt my cheeks go bright red. I had been just about to flash Josh my notebook. I stared blindly at the board, trying my best to appear completely engrossed. When Ronan turned around again, I quickly flashed what I’d written to Josh. “Don’t split your infinitives. I won’t stop till you promise.”
Josh scribbled something, flashed it quickly, then flipped to another page. “Fine. I promise. Now STOP.”
I practically jumped on him the moment class ended. I glanced around to ensure nobody was in earshot, making it a point not to catch Ronan’s eye. We were among the last out the door, but still, I knew to be discreet and slowly said, “So…I need you to help me find something…”
Find Carden.
He gave me a quiet nod. So he would help. “Let’s get out of here.”
I was relieved, but I also felt a little thrown, too. I’d expected jokes and evasions. “Aren’t you going to make a joke? No that’s what she said?”
“We have all day,” he said with a reluctant grin. “There. That’s what she said.”
His humor didn’t annoy me. If anything, it broke the tension. I patted his shoulder. “There’s the Josh I know.”
We made our way down the path to the dining hall, and out in the open, we were able to speak a little more freely. “I just have a few questions for you.”
He laughed. “So I gathered.” When I didn’t speak, he said, “So? Shoot.”
I was still getting used to the concept of friends, and his openness and willingness to help made me wary. “What’s the catch?”
“No catch. I assume this is about Master McCloud. You’ve got a thing for him, right?”
I stopped short. “How did you know?”
He shrugged.
“Seriously,” I pressed. Had other people guessed, too? “What gave it away?”
“I’ve seen you. Don’t worry,” he added quickly. “I don’t think other people would’ve noticed. Me, though…I see all, D.”