Dragon Haven (Rain Wild Chronicles #2) - Page 81/201

Thymara’s head whirled. A child? Jerd was pregnant? Was there a worse time and place to be pregnant? What had she been thinking? And before she drew another breath, she wondered angrily what any of the males had been thinking. Had any of them considered that they might be fathering a child? Or, like Rapskal and Tats, had it simply been a thing she was allowing them to do, and because they could, they did? Anger washed through Thymara.

“Who is the father of Jerd’s child?”

“It doesn’t matter really, does it? I’ll claim it, and that will be that.”

“I think you go about claiming too many things already. You may have appointed yourself king or leader, Greft, but I have not. I’ll tell you bluntly, I don’t accept your authority over me. And I am certainly not going to ‘choose’ one of the ‘males’ simply to stop the others from quarreling. If they are stupid enough to fight one another over something that is not theirs to claim, then let them.”

She nearly stood up and walked away. But her watch was not over, and the fire was her responsibility. She looked at him flatly. “Go away. Leave me alone.”

He shook his head. “You may wish it to be that simple, but it isn’t. Wake up, Thymara. If you don’t choose a protector and if I don’t enforce your choice of one, who is going to protect you? We are alone out here, now more than ever. There are four females and seven males. Jerd is with me. Sylve has chosen Harrikin. If you think—”

“Four females? I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Are you including Alise in your crazy plans?”

“She’s here and she’s female, so she’s included. That choice isn’t mine; it’s simply the reality of what is. I’ll let her adjust for a time before I speak with her about it. The reality is this, Thymara. We are all marooned here together. Just as the original Rain Wild settlers did, we will have to learn to make our homes here. This is where our children will be born and grow up. We, right now, this little huddle of sleeping people, are the seeds from which a new settlement will grow.”

“You’re insane.”

“I am not. The difference between us is that you are very young, and you think that ‘the rules’ mean something when there is no law and punishment to back them up. They don’t. If you don’t choose someone and make that choice plain, then someone will choose you. Or several someones. And you’ll either end up going to whoever battles his way to the right to claim you or being used by several men. I’d sooner not see the outcome of that.”

“I choose no one.”

He stood slowly, shaking his head. “I don’t think that’s an option for you, Thymara.” He turned away from her and then turned back. He spoke disdainfully. “Perhaps Tats is the best match for you. You can probably make him wait and lead him about by the nose until it suits your fancy to come to his bed. But he isn’t what I would choose for you and I’ll tell you why, plainly. He’s too tall; if he gives you a child, it will be too large for you to birth easily. I know you’ve said you won’t listen to my advice, but I suggest that you look at Nortel. He is one of us in ways that Tats can never be, and he’s more compatible in size. You don’t have to be with him forever. It’s possible that eventually you’ll take a different mate, or possibly several in your lifetime.”

He took a step away, then halted and looked back at her again. For a moment, his gaze seemed almost sympathetic. “Don’t think this is something I’m imposing on you. I simply happen to see people and situations for what they are. While the rest of you were singing songs and telling stories about the fire, I was talking with Jess. There was a man with book education and ideas. I’m sorry he’s gone. He opened my eyes to a lot of things, including how the greater world works. I know you think that I’m overbearing, Thymara. The truth is, I want us all to survive. I can’t force you to do this. I can only point out to you that, right now, you have the opportunity to make a choice. Wait too long, even a few days more, and that choice may be taken from you. Once men have fought over you and one has claimed you, it will be too late for anyone to assert you have the right to choose your own mate. Then you’ll have to live with what you have.”

“You are monstrous!” she cried in a low voice.

“Life is monstrous,” he replied imperturbably. “I was trying to make it less so for you. To make you aware that you should choose while you still can.”

He moved quietly and gracefully across the shifting logs. She watched him reenter the shelter. All peace had gone out of her night. Did Jerd know the sorts of things he said about her? He’d preferred her. That thought sent a shiver down her spine, and not of the pleasant kind. She recalled now that she had initially found him attractive. It had been flattering to have an older man pay attention to her. But even then, she recalled, he had been talking of “changing the rules.” Somehow his claim of honoring the Rain Wild traditions that women could determine their own futures rang false to her.