He turned away, groaning. “It’s not necessary.”
“Not necessary? Not necessary.” I grabbed his arm and made him turn back to me. “David, we need to study my powers. We—”
“Mike is doing fine with what he’s got going on in the training hall. I’ve seen his notes.”
“His notes! So you've seen how every time he put me in that cage, every time he makes me shoot things, I practically go into a coma for the next eight hours in excruciating pain! And you think this is okay?”
“Like he says, you just need to exercise it.”
“Are you kidding me? David.” I stopped, taking a few deep breaths. “It starts hearts.” I held up my hand. “What if it can turn a vampire back to a human?”
“I don’t know if I believe in that anymore, Ara.”
My eyes welled with hot tears. “But what if I do?”
He sighed, taking both my arms. “My love, there are more important things to worry about now.”
“But—”
“I don't want to hear any more. Look—” He kissed my forehead, swiping a cold tear from my cheek. “Maybe once this business with Drake is put to rest, I’ll approve a research division. Okay? But not now. Not while we have so many other things to focus on.”
“But it wouldn’t be a problem for you. This is on Jason—it’s his project. He won't get in your way,” I said, hopeful.
“It’s not open for discussion.”
“But…” I followed him across the room. “If you're worried about he and I being alone, you can put a guard on me. I—”
“Ara, please. I'm trying to pack. Can you…” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “We’ll discuss this when I return from Elysium on Monday.”
“No, we won't.” I spun away. “You’re just brushing it off, like you always do.”
He appeared behind me, his fingers grasping my arm. “Let’s get something monumentally clear here, my dear, sweet girl. I brush nothing off. And, yeah, maybe I'm hesitant to discuss this with you, because there's nothing to discuss. I won't approve a lab for Jason as a guise for him to spend time alone with you.”
“That's not what it is. Do you have no faith in him at all?”
“Not when it comes to you.”
“Yet you trust Arthur,” I said spitefully.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
I wanted to say that if he was worried about anyone trying to have sex with me, it should be his uncle, not Jason, but I was pretty sure that would result in Arthur’s death. And as I looked up into his troubled eyes, the exhaustion of everything came down on top of me. My lip quivered. “I can't do this anymore, David.”
“What, my love?” He pulled me close, my nice, loving David returning.
“I'm sorry. I know you don't want Jason and I to hang out, but he's trying to find a way to make my pain stop.”
“It’s not going to stop, Ara. He’s putting ideas into your head.”
“Is he? Or is it that you don’t want me to have any friends?”
“How can you say something like that?” He pulled away. “I’m not that sort of man, Ara, you know that.”
“Do I?”
“Ara, please?” His tone broke at the same time as his heart.
“David,” I said, exhaling. “Jason is my only real friend. He's the only one in this whole place who has my back, no matter what I do wrong.”
“What do you mean? What about me?”
“No. You're lying to me all the time. I can't trust anything you say.”
“Lying?” The skin on his forehead moved downward, bunching into a frown. “Ara, what makes you think I'm lying to you?”
“So many things.” I shook my head, laughing to myself.
“My love, please. Talk to me.”
“Well, for one, you told me I descended from Evangeline's bloodline, and now you tell me she died as a child, and you told me—”
“Hold on.” He put a finger up. “When I told you that story, I believed it to be correct. All I had learned came from Lilithian History books in our library. I told you what I knew to be the truth.”
“Really?”
“Yes.” He brushed my hair off my face. “And these aren’t the only half-truths we’ve all been told. You have to trust me, Ara. I did not tell you those stories to steer you in the wrong direction. If anything, ask Arthur why he never told you the truth. Ask him, or any other High Vampire Councillor, why they never corrected myself or any other vampire.”
“And, you see? That’s just it. Everyone keeps the truth so buried no one even knows what's true anymore. I mean, I came here believing Drake took revenge on all Lilithians because Lilith wanted to kill him, and now I'm told it’s because Lilith killed Anandene.”
“No. Anandene left Drake—betrayed him. She ran off with one of the council leaders.”
“That's not what Arthur told me.”
David looked down at his clasped hands, frowning. “What else did he tell you?”
“He told me not to discuss this with anyone.”
His lip tugged on one side, making his whole face softer with that smile. “You can tell me. I'm your husband.”
I nodded. “I know. That’s kind of why I'm telling you. I just…” I wandered over and sat on the box at the end of our bed. “I'm getting lost in this web of lies, David, and I don't really know who to trust.”
“Trust me.” He offered his hand. I took it.
“I'm trying.”
“Ara, trying isn’t good enough. What reason on God’s good earth would you have not to trust the one person in the world who always has your best interests at heart?”
“Because that one person is also willing to do things I don’t necessarily agree with in order to protect me.”
He placed his other hand over mine. “And I will do that whether you trust me with your truths or not. Nothing will change that.”
I allowed a small smile.
“Now, tell me what you know about Anandene.”
“Arthur told me that she cast a spell using the Stone of Truth, and it brought a curse on the lands—many people died. Lilith had to slay Anandene on the Stone to end the curse. Drake offered his life up, but Lilith tricked him, captured him and imprisoned him until Anandene was dead. There was nothing he could do to save her.”
David swallowed, lowering his hands to his knees as he walked backward and sat on the box. “He never told me that.”
“Who?”
“Drake.”
“He told you things?”
He nodded, his thoughts lost in some other place. “That’s . . . that’s really awful.”
I nodded. “Yep. And, so, that’s why he killed Lilith, not because he wanted the throne.”
“That makes so much more sense.” David nodded again. “There are so many lies layered over the top of lies. I can hardly see the truth under it all.”
“Do you think Arthur was lying about that story?”
He shook his head. “No. That’s the first time I've heard anything of it, which means it’s probably true.”
“So, then, what do you think about Drake wanting our child dead?”
He swiped a hand down his face, sighing, then slid his butt across the box and flopped back on the bed. “I don't care about that part of the story, Ara. The fact is that he’ll never even get half a chance to contemplate the idea of possibly making a plan to kill our child. I won't let that happen.”
I moved over and sat right by his waist, running my finger along the belt-line of his jeans. “And, what are you going to do about it?”
“I don't know.”
“Kill him with the Dagger of Yahanna?”
He sat up on his elbow. “How do you know about that?”
I shrugged. “I'm not as dumb as I look.”
“Arthur told you?”
I nodded.
“Why would he do that?” he said to himself, flopping back on the bed again.
“He…” I divided truths in my head and carefully chose which ones to share. “He wanted to prepare me for the fact that you were going to die.”
His chest stopped lifting, his body becoming immensely still, only his throat moving as he obviously swallowed all the grief he was holding but would never share.
“David?”
“Mm?”
“Why didn't you tell me about the dagger?”
He sighed and rolled up on his elbow, placing his hand firmly over mine. “I didn't want to break your heart. We fought so hard to be together, and you—” He squeezed my hand. “You wanted to die after you were tortured. And that was only because you thought I was dead. So, what would happen to you if you had to be here, alone, ruling, doing things you didn't believe you were capable of, if you also had the burden of losing me?”
My eyes watered.
“I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Ara. I am. I wanted to, and that’s why I stayed away. In fact, I laid here—” He pointed to the pillows. “I came to you one night, laid here for hours telling you everything, and in that one perfect moment, as I stroked your cheek, you smiled, and for the first time ever in my life, I felt like everything would be okay.”
I laid a hand gently to his cheek. “It will.”
“No.” He pulled away. “It won’t. It can’t be, and that single moment I let myself believe it would caused more pain than I ever knew existed, because I was forced to realise then that I’d never feel like that again.”
“But it doesn't have to be that way, David.” I grabbed his hand and held it tight. “You don't have to kill Drake.”
“Yes, I do. He will come for you, Ara. He will come for our baby one day, and I can't—” He shook his head, searching for words. “I can't live with that fear. I need you safe. I need our people safe.”
“I won't lose you,” I said, and it was non-negotiable.
He looked at me, seeing my thoughts, seeing my strengths, but none of what I felt seemed to matter to him at all. “You will, Ara. There is no choice. It takes the hand of a king to use that dagger, and I am the only king.”
“There are hundreds of people who would take that role and kill Drake, David. It doesn't have to be you.”
“I am the only rightful king,” his voice grew louder.
“There are ways around it,” I said sternly.
And his body shifted, his shoulders going back as he saw the words in my mind: king by right of heir. “No.”
“Why?” I stood up as he appeared across the room by the fireplace.